A letter from April 22nd, 2015

Dear FutureMe, School today was super ******. I didn't tie my hair up and it was frizzy and gross. I wore my tight green pants that made my butt look nice. Accounting sucks balls and I didn't understand the tutorial, and my tooth is a little sore. As of today, I've been taking noni-juice for just over a month, no-poo for just over a week, and have been taking vitamins for... around three-four months? I wish you could tell me if they worked for you; would really help. I've applied for my second semester, and have decided to do German ONLY because I wasn't able to do population health - pandemics and *****, remember? Sounded really interesting and fun? Yeah. Hopefully that went okay? Deine Augen sind wie Sterne? (-50 if you no longer remember what that means. Hint: German Flirting, Duolingo.) Also, what did you end up doing with the nest egg that grandad left you? Did you invest it? Do you still have some left? Yesterday Bashir told me I wouldn't be able to name one of the babies Laurence, which is my favourite name, due to conditions of his religion, i.e. only Arabic names. I am a little sad, but it is okay - don't think it will have made a difference? Forever I've had a list of names that I loved, and have always been thinking about middle names, i.e. my grandad's name as a middle name. But they all went out the window, and I will (assume) be naming my kids with names that mean nothing to me. But I respect him and the religion, even though I am an atheist. YOU WILL NOT HAVE LOST THIS RESPECT, YOU HEAR ME. And I love him so much. So so much. I hope by the time you read this, you have a cat (named either Pickle, Gherkin, or Salem), straight teeth, are living with Bashir, nice hair and body, and finally, happiness. (maybe babies?). I hope you have managed to get rid of your depression, too. Found a nice job that gives you decent money and you enjoy? ******* betting my life that this accounting/marketing degree pans out nicely for me. Your dad was being an non-supportive ******* over the weekend, I hope you haven't forgotten and haven't asked him for ****. Not that he isn't your dad, but having his new family has changed him. He has to put money into his new kids, (3 and 8) while he's 50. Great plan, dad. Would love for you to tell me how he's going with his money-hungry wife and franchise up north. Her expensive taste probably ate away at them, didn't it? Are they back down in Auckland now? They probably are. "Oh, Graham, let's go to the Crab shack and get scallops after we go to Gucci." And tell mum you love her, and that she looks pretty today. She has worked very hard for you, and although you got a job and have recently been able to do little things, and spoil her every now and then, I hope you've bumped it up a notch. She is why you are who you are. If you've made it this far, congratulations, Renee - you've succeeded :) Be grateful, and never regret. Live. Much love, Your 19-year old self.