A letter from Dec 26, 2024

Dear FutureMe, i’m scared for the place you maybe in. i’m scared you’re still sucked into to the same vicious cycle. drinking, smoking, pills. i can’t be sober, regardless of the method. she is ******* me. i’m better in a lot of ways, as you know. but not that. and i just hope and pray you get out. last time i did this i was holding on, but im not anymore, and i just hope we made it out. i am tired of the never ending heart break, im tired of feeling like a child. i used to hold onto “things get better”, but i don’t believe it. 4 years and the only progress i have made is how i handle my pain. and all she does is add to it, why do i hurt myself more? i just want you to be better than me, than yourself. please be better. we are dying at this point in our timeline