A letter from Jul 03, 2024

Dear ******, I know you've hurt me. I know I've hurt you. I'm sorry if just breaking off the relationship for a year hurt you a lot. You told me that you didn't really have anyone else. But what you did really put me off, and as I said at that time "put the final nail on the coffin" or the likes of that. We were both disgusting to eachother. Yet I still miss you. It has only been a month yet I want to get back into this or that awful relationship. We both knew eachother too well. All we did was argue and disagree. For me, I always saw you as a competition. I always want to be better than you. Have all the things you have when I even have more than you. I feel disgusting, I only miss you because I want to compare myself to you and make you and myself miserable. Because that's the only thing I'm good at. But you don't know how much it hurts to be this way. You said you hated spoiled children no matter what, I didn't really tell you then that I was a spoiled child, or if you already knew. But to be true to you I hate myself a lot for being one. you said to me that you wanted to fix me, frankly it felt disgusting to me that you said that to me. Something also tells me we are very similar when you said that. But right now, I dont know how to feel about it. I think that all we ever did was love the hatred we had between us. Right now I'm the system for minors with mental health issues. I hope that the help I'll get there will help me be a better person for you. we'll meet again in a year or so. As you wanted. I hope you're doing better than me I wonder if you miss me, or if you'll get over me. Sincerly, your friend Ms.Buggy