A letter from Jun 14, 2024

Dear FutureMe, How are you? Better than how Im feeling now I hope. I write this down for you hoping you could see it in a year, and realize how you grew as a person. I'm here laying on my bed, sad, broken and feeling a little bit of disappointment in myself. I looked up unto myself, not seeing my worth, my talent, and my emotional health in a good state. For days, I only saw a broken person. I've always heard such disappointments from our mother, the way she always tell me that Ill be nothing, dreamless, and talentless, that I couldnt amount to anything... It left only tears upon my eyes. I tried forcing myself to be a better person for her, for my brother and to everyone, but I didnt have any progress as of recent, even my own talent vanishes from me. College, pau... What do you think about? Are we still both too afraid to mingle with people? Too afraid that we'll always be humiliated? Are we still too weak to face growth and improvement? What are we, exactly...? I graduated 12th year now, I could only think, what was my next step in this lifetime? Was it to stay at home and practice my talent? Or to go out with people, learn and experience the life of a normal person, like I couldnt experience. Pau... So much has happened, I met this person, Leia. Shes honestly one of the best. She was our breathing space, our strength, our inspiration, our ally, and the only person who understood us. I hope.. You'll still love her and choose only her, no one else. Pau, I hope you carry out all the burden to yourself, learn how to compress your emotions, learn how to move on your own, learn how to be independent. Learn to love yourself, learn to always love the things that you do, rekindle your passion, youe talent. And love youe family, and... Leia. I hope youre more handsome na, I really hope that you continued to improve on yourself, and maybe.. soon enough, I might see a glowup. I love you, and I love our girl, our family.