A letter from Jun 08, 2024

ChatGPT Dear 23 year old me, I guess I gotta start this letter by wishing you a very happy birthday. I hope you did some lovely things on your birthday with people who care about you. I am gonna give you a recap of my year this year. Not long after my birthday I left for the biggest trip I have done by myself so far. I went to Santiago the Compostella. I started in st jean pied de port and walked all the way to Santiago. This was such a wonderfull experience, I met so many lovely people such as Kristina, Matt, John, Johnny, VB and Tom. I had so many meaningfull conversations on the way and it definetly gave my confidence a major boost. It is great to remember that if I can walk close to a 1000 kilometers by myself, I can do anything I put my mind to. I came back from santiago and moved into an appartment with my sister. This is so far the best place I have lived. Yes we do have struggles about who does the cleaning sometimes but I would have had those in any place I would have lived. But it is also the most amazing thing ever, we can talk for ours, do crafts together, just come home and have a quick chat, make dinner together. It feels like home. I finished up the remaining part of my studies and started figuring out what to do with the rest of my life. I decided that being a kindergarten teacher was an option I would definetly be satisfied with. I was already teaching swimming to babies, infants and todlers. To be fair this was not an easy journey because I did not study to be a kindergarten teacher so I had to learn a lot. And I definetly learned a lot from it and if I decide this is the path I want to continue walking I am sure I will still learn a lot more. I am still unsure if I am going to be a kindergarten teacher for the rest of my life yet but that is okay. Although it is a job I absolutly love doing it is also a job that is not all too sustainable. I love how these kids are so new to the world and I can help show them about the world and hopefully help them grow into amazing people. However I have also noticed over the past half year that I feel like I barely have a proper rest period. I work and then come back from work and have to first spend about an hour to destimulate since kids are overstimulating and it is a job where you always have to be turned on and aware. As I am thinking about my future I have plenty of wonderfull options that I am going to explore and hopefully you can tell me next year wich ones worked out and wich ones didn't. One of those oppurtunities is that I will teach private swimming classes, this is something quite a few people have asked me to do. I would love doing this and eventually have my own swimming school. This is something I have looked into a lot, it will not be easy but it willl most definetly be worth it. The other option I would love is starting up my own forest school. This is an idea born in denmark and finland where they teach there kids outside cause children deserve to spend more time outside and learn in a different setting then a classroom. Both of these ideas have been in my mind for quite some time now and I am working hard to realise those dreams. I know that those ideas will not happen over night and I need to put time, money and effort into them. Besides all of this I also started doing the thrive program to fix my fear of trowing up. This is somethings I am insanely proud of. I started doing this after I was sick for the first time in years again and I spend 2 whole weeks panicking. It was so bad that I went to the doctor and she told me I had to calm down and start eating again other wise my body would take very long to heal again. This truly was the worst my fear has ever been. I decided I needed to do something about this and I did. It was scary and it took 2 months of intense working on myself but it has paid of. I did not run away when a kid in class trew up, I drank alcohol for the first time ever, I went to a party (did not enjoy it tho but that wasn't because people were drunk and could trow up), I haven't spend nights worrying about maybe getting sick, I cared for my sick boyfriend. These may seem small to many but to me these are major steps wich I am insanely proud of. A summary of life lessons I have learned this year: - making mistakes is not only okay it will also lead to growth. - you can try anything you want. Best case it works out, worst case it doesn't work out but you either have an experience or a learning opportunity. - everyday is a great day to be alive. - it is okay to have a different opinion to the rest even if this is hard sometimes. - if there is a god he loves everything even me. I deserve to be loved by people and god. - surround yourself with people who know more then you and you will always learn. - giving myself a routine might feel stupid in the beginning but it does work. Things I want to achieve next year: - I want to start learning how to love myself and actively work on being kind to myself and doing things that will boost my self esteem. - I want to learn how to declutter my house and clean it. I am following a 365 days declutter challenge and I am going to complete thise challenge - next year I want to say yes to as many experiences I can and say no to people putting extra workload on my plate when it is not my job to do there work. - I want to continue building the life I want instead of hoping it would happen someday. - currently I am saving 1/3 of my salary to buy a house later. The rest goes to rent, food etc. I want to continue saving up as much as I can spare for a house some time in the future. - I want to surround myself with people who inspire me. It was a long letter but it also was a busy year with loads of learning opportunities. I will see you next year on the 8th of june and untill then I wish you all the best. Your friend Merel