Dear FutureMe,
Hi. I just wrote a lot. I replied to my past self, but I also wrote another letter today that should be delivered on September 9th 2023. I am doing homeschool right now. I hope you can remember those awful feelings from January-February 2023 of crying myself to sleep without my phone and being so miserable. This is the worst time of my life. By a mile. I have never felt so depressed. I am planning to go on antianxiety/depressant meds and I am seeing a psychiatrist tomorrow. I tried to overdose a few times. I lied to everyone about it. Then I thought of jumping out of the balcony. I hope 15/16 year old me is over those feelings. I want to become a better person. I hope in three years from now I’m thriving. I hope I am still alive. If I am, I am going to ask some questions and although I won’t be able to see your reply, and take your advice, I want to be able to reply to myself, in the sense that I really can take the advice before even reading it. First question: how does it feel to have no braces. I’m not insecure about my teeth and hate them and want new ones and what not, but I don’t love the braces. My next questions is this: are you still reading? Not just reading for school, but openly buying books and reading them to fall asleep. I just finished flowers for Algernon and it was really good. The next thing I want to know is are you writing? I was thinking about either making a journal, or just a full on book..or maybe even both! I wanted to call it Mentally Fat. Because, I am, In fact, Mentally Fat. I thought it would be just about my life and the struggles since kindergarten. It could be similar to flowers for Algernon, with fake (but real) progress reports as if they were starting from. My first day of kindergarten all the way to where I am now. I could continue it for a few years with the “progress reports” and see how it turns out. I hope you follow through. I want to be someone when I grow up. Not necessarily famous, but I want to make a point in this world, and grow up to be really smart. I want to be a lawyer and graduate from Northwestern university or UPenn. My next question is how are the dogs? None of them died right? (Hopefully) Any new ones? Who is working for us as help? I cannot imagine Christina is still there. A really important question coming up..What school did you end up going to? (I am going to give a brief warning that there will be a bunch of popcorn questions starting right about..now.) Did you leave after 8th? How did you manage to stay in school? (If you didn’t get kicked out) How is hockey? What do you consider your “main sport” as of today? If you didn’t leave after 8th and stayed for 9th, did you make varsity club? How was commencement? Were you field hockey/hockey/crew/any other sport captain? Probably not hockey, but I am expecting field hockey. This text question might trigger a weird PTSD. No more mental hospitals right? Especially not Charlotte Hungerford I hope. Were you Mr. Przygocki, Mrs. Giese, or Mr. Greens prefect? How is Charlotte? Who are your REAL friends? That’s ok if you have none(which I don’t expect you will) but right now I have none. And that’s okay. I’m dealing with it. My trusted adult right now is Allie Molner. I am happy with that. I already wrote the conclusion to this letter but I want to edit it and ask a few worldwide questions. Have you moved houses? Have you gotten a new phone? What new phones are there? Any pandemics? Have any family members died? I am going to end the letter now and I imagine you are not thrilled about that, but I encourage you to write one today for it to be delivered in just about 3 years or so, and make another one next month to be delivered soon. Also, when you write back to me, please make it long. Although I will not see it, I feel that you will respond in a wholesome way. By the way, have you blown up on tiktok? My recent tiktok of Dallas just got like 500k+ views and I am VERY proud. These are really fun, and emotionally therapeutic too..be good, xoxo Georgina at 12:34pm from feb12023❤️
Epilogue
about 1 month later
Hi. It’s been just over three years since I got this letter. Some answers:
No braces is great! Got them off over a year ago.
I don’t read as much...
Noyaemr. Rfo gnhlsie enradgi ailotl. Elik it ooso iepdkc cooslh ti dna tub it is i rfo.
Werti i no’dt. All ta.
Acaylult are sdog ie,fn. Eidd oen on. Oga stnmoh efw a tfle ujged. Neevs aylcalut hstonm goa i tihnk. Omm fo rtide got hmi. Fynnu you teonimn atiisnhcr. 4202 she tlef ni. Heiwl ew a webnete cnbuh i etratnmte ahd saw in ohlwe in. !tath hemo aubot oyu stomhn nda ceno rtantmeet asw wnok tndi’d in todn’ fro i oh 22 og. Otnghit comgin ruoipsve snitihacr uro hwo euekohserep gecar cakb is !htgir saw ,ftel ittgeesnirn ubesaec aylltacu. Nebe ehre ayser ash cuolep a ahs a tihkn rof. Odgo e’hss.
Atntetmer i to ndeimo,tne sa i wetn. Mddile th7 eht slteda of thta orfm h9t of imldde to. Me dha het hda i ot saoltphi th,9 a rof t01,h ni ntilot tmtpeat eht sadtetr fo os disecui a ot tfel ewn aveel hsmhparie orf wichh i altumyilte ewek dna tub in scohol tesr wetn hte. I’m eht itfrs …hlcoos was at of oh ti eewk onw llwe! sfniuo. Tcyi ninrlega tsi’ eods a yda in eno oen het on oohslc that. Rbchi next goign robypbla y,ear ot mi’. Ekaspngi mebrerme uyo ghrit if wlduo eerw hte own i uyo to eanm. Chaierl enwt heert. Ae!yr ruiojn wow. I oirsen kitnh ereht ill’ aeyr be oot. In tawsn em add enafrc ot ym tsduy. Lil’ tlli itnhk i iawt glcoele. Lgle!coe elegocl. .
Etnw ustsnioqe veren eht i erusym tbauo dgsregdrnaii escubea kbca.
In uodlc i baby’s ot her t9h i asw nluit tlas grdea ti auseecb og sa omeh reednurt aeyr olng eoncemtenmmc ddi dna orf dtseya ehwn ihwt sa i uchot i. It aws ifen. Vee,reoyn nice aawwrkd tieltl ssegu but saw ti a ignsee i. I tfel sodtepp rymsue i psotsr hwne gdoin. I evi’ own lstae ta eayrs rof 3 aelpdy ihntk koeyhc odn’t. I kown. ’duyo eodschk eb lprbobay. Ti, i deus sseug tbauo oadaswyn stnoaiasep be rcea utb i ot i dnto’. Vleea sbpereetm last ocehky i tub i difel hda olhsco rtdeats ot asdi as. Nda ndmeyla sieonr het erew hiert erya for asnpitac mona. Nbee ehva mnoa em wdulo i swn’ta hrtee and tub it. Bbya me ltdo. .
Lohispsta anmtel. Dstp no. Gderrigte yes nto tbu im’ stp,d wlle. Wnet vener ecccnotnitu asohtlip ni i ckba hc ot. Ro i rtewo tnkhi eben 6 won htis ot i 5 ie’v necsi. Was so i vinea wwo.
On tfcerep. Fnei laotchret si. I nweh netw etcneemcomnm ot wsa in i jeun ’basby hre. I ni t’nca hess’ you gaaingrudt ?oms?hnt a uoplec oculd eeelivb jtsu. Khtin gduirn she ayre idfle reh mar i ockhey tlas ilek orebk. 2‘4. Up hatugc rm htwi ergne. Nwok disesm me i he. Tell cudlo i. Utjs gvionm as rpta ti aeidzlre no tonetg ehntsyo,l ’iev das fo flei ubt ldore i was is. Thnik tusj adn i ubtoa ,ttah i imh idd nofte od’tn so. Ta llautcay all. Adn satt’h ko. Ok im.
Odvme ont have oeussh.
17 tog eth ,61 opinhe now.
On amncisepd.
Yam eddi satl rtgea rdamagn.
Dgneni nmid etelrts ’tond i het htat y,ahe. I heva ym wehol orem to flie wrtei.
Ngoig htgir to ewrti dna dna otn wngaithc neinucot ’mi i ’egyrs atwn antmaoy ot bcaeeus abkc was onw. I natedw ot onwk ubt i me esubcea ouy i,dd. Eb i my say and wshi pu i hug fro adn csome nad epreadrp ckbule exnt giev elfs dlouc tsap a atwh. Vhea a esuacbe lwuod utb titell earpepr oulcd inawrgn cnie nebe ,em nitnhgo. Actlua,yl pu eray a did bowl goa i koittk no. In otg kloo ecno i nivilg as omfr ni bcka i i swa ckab eth hdith,igns arttmete,n aspt. Zaleiedr tlfe wrgon fo tors i had was ereoevny p,u and ehdnbi i. 13 yrae mfro 2023 like odl a. ’tnddi raelt i a ryae nad izlaeer it intul. Of 2202 i nad pieoflr rucepit ym mheo i oen hinnggca ngteitg ot dan berermme rofm bydar. Swa ti 0522. I tbu nhtgoni i hopost on dah fo lfsme,y had. Yeamorn it 2220 adn i dditn’ ’wsnat eealzir. Moved hda on eppelo em ottuhwi. Atth ay,swyan ogurh saw. Ralvi to nad no ktinh etims a oepcul go koitkt did i ti tdrei i wkro. Ngthoni huogth zrayc. Nocacut llo allsda tog ekahdc the. Achin ubt llits i’ts oems by pu rhsceak urn ni. Ktinh i tdno’ tbu etyh ostp ’ist ynufn. Wya wheer in enievurs oesm yaok olyu’l iwcte, a or utsj u’roye eb isht there fi irdgane si that lelapalr onwk nstihg aehpnp. Akme oyu llwi dan ti tuo. You tdn’o erthe llyou’ dieyteifnl be ,uot lilw miets it uoy liwl amek rhwee btu tnhki. Aeubsec od adn i who idd wo?kn ti i. Dseeept tou made ti miest i steadkr ifel ym of fo eth. Rptfeec otn now is ti igtrh. At lla. Oen ton itb. I ehva ltils yman esgulstgr. ,genrdta at adn otn btu i nwo to bcuesae egarfutl noe orf i do ttha ’im i athw veha orf od ipnot toko ti knwo. Eifl oooooso so acrsy is. Si’t thurt eth. Vie’ g,o adn ppena,h hatt ouy nda but usjt ocunt oslufyer rvee ot lppeoe si on nerda,le to eth peek uoy kicst nrespo saeucbe ,gvnomi but gstiegb gtsihn is eth veah uanrod lnyo ialtymtl,eu senlos coem. .
.
Loev you i.
Nigsgin ffo.
.
2260 - 35:p5m ,th6 hcarm gnaeoi,rg.
💕.
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hey stranger!
i wish you luck and happiness on your journey <3 after reading this i am so proud of you and you also gave me some push to move forward (virtual hug)
so lets both keep on moving forward (SMILE)
parmis.is.blue:
3 months ago