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Hey *****, ***** pretty rough right now but probably better than the last time I wrote one of these stupid things. We moved out of dad's house a year and half ago and moved into our current place with Rani, her bf and mom almost a year ago. I'm dating raine and I really don't want to but I'm too afraid of being alone so I won't break up with them. Isn't that sad?I'm 18 years old and I have no friends. Me and Rani haven't been close since she started dating Dylan by now she probably moved in with him. I think that's what hurts the worst in all of this is that I'm alone. Yea I've been alone but idk this time it's just different. Like I know people care about me still and that I'm just like this bc I'm depressed but idk. This is just rough, I would rather be back at Dad's. But if we were there we wouldn't be starting T in hopefully 4 days. Holly ****. I'm starting ******* T in 4 days. I can't wait for this, I don't know what I would do if I didn't know I was starting this soon. I've been waiting for this for so long and I can't just give up right before I can truly be myself. Am I hoping this will help my depression and anxiety ****? Yes. But I know it won't cure it. It's just something to give me hope which I need alot of right now. Anyways I'm also hopefully getting a job soon which will be interesting but it will most likely be with mom's best friend so you know it will be easy. The cats are doing great, Mary Jane is gonna be 1 next month, Fatty will be 2 soon and Bebe is already 2. My gauges are at 22mm and I have both sides of my nose pierced, second holes, and industrial(rip). I also got a few tats. Not sure what else to say bc I don't want to say anything else depressing so peace dude. I hope things are good for us.
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