A letter from Jun 25, 2022

Dear Me, Okay, I got impatient and decided to another letter despite the last one being legit 2 mins ago. Here are my hopes for the future and maybe if I haven't done these in the next 3 years, I'll add them to a bucket list and plan them out. I hope you're in a safe, comfortable space with lots of supportive loving people, maybe even a community, who love you for you and you're not afraid to be out with them. I hope you embrace yourself fully, have taken care of yourself physically and mentally for once and have the confidence to walk outside in public, dressed the way you want, act the way you want with the people you genuinely want to keep in your life. I hope you got that awesome short haircut you've wanted for years (since Yr 9 now that I think about it. Sheesh that was more than 5 years ago...) and dyed it in every colour of the rainbow. I hope you have tons of cool ear piercings and random tattoos that make you smile and maybe some even have little stories accompanying it. I hope you've built up the courage to add your chosen name to your legal one and have begun or have already asked the people around you to call you by your chosen name. I hope mum and dad are happy and healthy and even if you haven't properly come out to them yet (failed the first time didn't it 😂) that they're more than okay with supporting your adult decisions. I hope you've had some experience with relationships and dating since as of this very moment, you have none (sad ik). I hope your brother is happy and thriving since he deserves more than everything in this world and that his confidence has not diminished. Oh my, if it's three years time, that means he's in Uni! I'm so curious about what he'll major in asldkfjskda. I hope you have continued to pursue your passions and hobbies despite the difficult schoolwork (just had to go and chose friggin biomed huh 😂) and you've successfully entered the medical field like you've always dreamed of. Don't forget your dream to volunteer at MercyShip! Speaking of hobbies, I hope you've finally started that instagram art account and produced music of your own or even covers. I hope you haven't stopped crocheting and reading. I hope you have plans on making a webtoon or even a mini comic. The one about those supergrannies with the grim reaper sound hilarious 😂 I hope you still continue playing DnD and found some people who are more than willing to play with you and aren't friggin in a whole *** different country making the setting up of a session so **** difficult can you tell I'm a little pissed? 😅 I hope you haven't given up on your creativity and still continue to fulfil your millions of little projects despite your short patience;;;;; I hope you've travelled a lot and met tons of new fun people and experienced all sorts of crazy things like sky-diving or scuba-diving or just anything really hahah this country is boring af. I really hope you've stepped outside your bubble and allowed yourself to experience people outside this tiny island nation full of a small-minded majority. I hope you still keep in touch with the IB kiddos and the individuals you know are people you really wanna keep for the rest of your life. You know who they are heheh. I hope you've learnt to love yourself and have realised how much potential and strength you have. Or well, at least, that's what the adults around me are saying ahahah... yeah one day. Gosh, I still don't feel like an adult yet despite being legal lmao. I hope you have enough love in your heart to forgive and forget. It's nauseating to think of right now but I hope that this feeling doesn't persist in the next three years. You know who I'm talking about. I hope you invest that love into people who are immensely more emotionally mature and are people who care for you like you care for them. Don't be afraid to reach out. I hope you've forgiven yourself for not knowing better til you did. I hope God has helped you heal and has led you down a wonderful path full of love and gratitude and comfort. Of safety. Of joy. Of acceptance. I hope you are now able to say you're happy with yourself. I hope you're okay with loving yourself. Cuz as we all know, without it, we won't be able to love others fully.