A letter from Oct 2nd, 2021

Peaceful right?

Dear FutureMe, I am so proud of you at how far you have come in the last 10 years. From where you were at the age of 20. Having a baby, in an unhealthy relationship that was abusive, to unable to finish school because your priorities weren’t straight like you thought. To a lot of partying and living. You made a lot of great memories but hid a lot of pain. Right before turning 30 you wanted a healthier version of you. You took your mental health serious and put in work for yourself. Continuous therapy, dealing with your depression/anxiety, letting go of friendships & relationships that are not serving you. Creating an atmosphere that is healthy for you and your babies. Being more present for your babies. For your 30’s you have set the Intentions of peace, love, and happiness. To be a better version of yourself. You have left a relationship, which has been painful, but to make the Intensions you set for yourself to be true. You have realized life is too short to be Unhappy. & all through your 20’s you were Unhappy. The best version and happiest version of yourself will reflect in your boys. They too will be the best versions of themselves. I hope you have kept your goals in vision and keep knocking each one off of your list. Because you are capable of anything you set your mind too. You are strong, resilient, admirable, a leader, a loving mother, and a wonderful friend. Hold on to the people who fill up your cup when needed and don’t forget to keep filling theirs up as well. 💜 Love always, Me. You have grown so much from 20 until 30. Keep growing & glowing!

Epilogue

over 3 years later

Dear Me,

I need you to pause for a moment and really take in how far you’ve come because I know you don’t give yourself enough credit.

Life didn’t get...

Oephd once uyo eikl it lodwu eiaesr cgmlayali. Ni ft,ca eihreva w,asy it otg in mayn. Tkal ontd’ iwtehg kdni dan of tou het uyve’o omst asctke,bs plpeoe botau abrarhtke,e atht ninfucs,oo ntaomiole rrecaid odlu. You aer ehre and ety illst. Ytgrni ltsli. Ehnw bete,rt eenv trhsu lltis it igoscnho.
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Hsti eoahtnr ptsa otin tifuluaeb efiv rlowd sey,ra elif teh oubtgrh ni oyu. Rthee rea a thomer of ouy nwo. To evo,l hrete umahsn fro nda uoy titell euidgcan kolo how aytesf,. Efle epedtsi eoms zlrieea thme who days, uoy are than oyu you ivgngi rome.
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- yuo ienrdcible heontmsgi atdugdear ddi ouy. Ocen in yuo sfinedih ,2502 tlfe htaw ipmlsoiesb. Oyu ohw onw aew eb ot nsevrio ahd fo otsp o?ga in esh of taht ulwdo seyar ouy tynevihger.
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Neev aanig threa eelav been sah trhof ritehlasponi eth dna uyro uhhotg a oyu ledpul ni uoy kacb has atth sdetet amde to ciohec nad ely,pde. Ts’awn hatt sseenwak a. Wsa tsgrhent ttha a. Was atht gotwrh. Neev ntiauercn letf you it and ,ulsyrefo nehw oshngcoi ahtt was rgitfnyier.
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Elfe nkow tslo onw trihg uyo i.
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Elef wokn yaeh,v eiosatl,d rfo nhsiogw yfloesur ekil oyu yruo as i of nda teh tno evionrs kdsi estb ’uryeo pu. Nkwo ttah ldouc you eref hpnape lenagih i tehion-rvg eawk uolcd dan uoy up lfee dna stju hswi how,le ,payhp.
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Ont ash’tt woskr ubt ohw tshi. And emna ru’eoy sten’do gnaifli hatt.
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Oyu oen esqura rae abkc at nto.
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Oonsmee wno aer sha ohw ouy tlsoo. Rasensewa. Exeeircnpe. Odnsuirabe. Yuor yb ,oaymern uyo niebg etyh dtyso—pu your otn dc,o sdeeo,rnsip mhet iaang lfee ildbnyl yrou vene exynait, rea ulod fi lnorcedtlo ruoy igtrh ozciegenr onw.
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Nilhgea lnie is a tthrsiga ton. Messy it’s. Oopsl it. Ti susepa. It asttersr. Uoy igtnehvrey, osmetmsie nudone yu’oev tub nad eslfe ekli it ’vehant.
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Oyu lsilt rotgs,n ouy erwot reinleist that uabto econ omnaw rae.
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Ouyr’e lauctl,ya emor that tnah won.
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Own lfal dan artpa ti secbuae ggino uoy nowk ekli hatw ltsli to fseel keep.
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Ton rae a uoyr rusaivvl eifl gudblienir fo you aclpe mrof rth,ut.
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Uroy ot aleldow etim era ekat you.
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Emas dna ot lawdelo are uelfpho meti das lefe ta you hte.
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Ot out ti lla loaewdl aveh are figedru yte tno uyo.
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Hsit: hatw easrtmt si.
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Ntyrig uyo aer.
Iogcohns are ebtert ouy.
Eehr stlil aer uyo.
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Tath is adn of mnthosegi to dpruo be.
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A tecrepf svrione ende idsk ’dnto ruoy oyu fo.
Heyt eon ende a lare.
Oen ilhaneg a.
A eon ggiowrn.
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Ayxclte who si oyu era atth adn.
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Ngoig epek.
No syda enve the etuiq.
Eavhy eevn yasd het no.
Ton nigakm eikl you vnee oresgpsr uero’y hnwe eelf.
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Cebuaes uoy rae.
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Neo fele nda so ckba yuo rtingtas sfeyluro lliw uchm iperd ittgsin te-h eht at d,ay of ve—aondr yuo oen shti olko ni lwil npssomiaco kownnn,u onvreis.
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Yuo ear slto nto.
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In gncibome aer yuo hte fo deildm.
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Hiwt eolv,.
💜 me.

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