A letter from January 2nd, 2021

happy birthday 18 year old me, hey babes how are you? if im correct your a senior right now and probably going to graduate soon. im writing this to you right now and to be completely honest i think you'll remember this and be waiting for it in the beginning of 2025. honestly im really excited for this year and im hoping it goes well. as you know or i would hope you know.. im 13 as im writing this. and well i only have like less than two years to think about if i want my quinceañera and how i want it and blah blah blah. but anyways enough about me for now. who are your friends right now? is there anything really important that has happened between right now and the current date your reading this? if so, what are those things? do you have anything planned for today? maybe hang out with some friends or family? have a party? i dont know. but what college are you thinking of going to right now? im sorry these questions are boring i dont even know what to type because im bored and whatever. dads talking to me right now. but uhhhhhhhhh yeah i dont know what to say. ill go search up what to say right now hahah. okay.. first set, what do you look like right now? are you pretty? have you finally decided to pick a style you feel comfortable in? what do you act like? how do you dress? next set, what do you like doing now? i mean i still like painting and drawing and being with my parents, although technically im sitting at the kitchen island and dads playing his fifa2020 that danny got him and moms watching youtube next to him. but uhhh sorry i got off track, um. what are your current habbits? i crack my joints a lot, snack a lot, complain about how i look, swearing, and drink coffee, and as you can see using "um" and those type of words a lot. i do have good habbits i guess? i mean i use manners. sorry i had to stop typing to snap valerie back and search up good habbits lol. but uhhhhh anyways next, i dont even know what to say. but actually now that im talking to valerie, are you still friends with her? but right uh anyways, the questions.. how do you feel about yourself and your place in the world? are you comfortable with your personality? are you still obsessed with atla and tlok and mlb? my funko pops actually came in today haha. uh, are you still comfortable with your ********* and pro-nouns? im bi and i go by she/her but what about you now? are you finally out? are you proud of who you are? are you still really close with our family? im currently really close with them and everything and i hate when they yell at me but we're besties. anyways, friendships now. im gonna read a list of people that im close with or just friends with right now. valerie, shes my bestfriend, savannah, we're super close, kylee, kind of close, yahir, eh i mean were okay, juliet, we're kind of close i guess, kaya, we're kind of drifting but i guess we're still close in a way. who are you close with now? do you have a s/o *wink wink*. next set.. how does your home look like right now? what about the outside world? is it better or worse? what does a typical day look like for you? ugh im getting annoyed of typing so imma copy and paste things from a website. “Am I choosing the right major?” “Did I ever learn to take care of my body?” “Will I always overthink everything?” “When will I stop drinking so much?” “Will I ever not need to call mom every time I have a bad day?” “Will I ever really grow up?” “When do boys turn into men?” “Do I regret the nights I can’t remember with the people I won’t forget?” “Is cereal really not a food group?” “Will I ever see a comma in my bank account?” “Will I really start a life with my soulmate?” “Was college really worth all of the money?” “Do I have more faith in my dreams than my fears?” “Will I ever have a career?” “Have I been settling?” “Are my friends still number one?” "Has life been about the journey?" “Have I seen the world and did I let it shape me?” “Can I stop worrying that I’ll be a failure yet?” Most of all... “Am I happy?” anyways im back. ive been really good and whatever. i hope your okay since i dont even wanna live sometimes. i love you, hope you read this.. goodbye