A letter from November 4th, 2020

Dear future Mila, how are you?? I hope you're well. Today seems to be a much better day than usual, so I won't be too pessimistic. Most of this letter is going to be me asking you questions about how things are now and telling you what I hope you've accomplished. So here we go! How are things with you and Cristian?? I really hope things are even better than what it's like for me because I really love him like crazy and want to marry him someday... I know... cheesy right? But it's true! I hope you and Cristian are together and thriving. Speaking of which, how's Nova doing?? I hope she hasn't died yet because of that sunburn I gave her like two weeks after mommy gave her to me. If Nova died, I hope you got another plant and took better care of it. Also... my condolences to you <3. I hope you're okay... I really do. I want you to be much happier than me, and I want you to have more friends to go to when you're sad, and your family close to you so you can visit them when you need to feel warm. About the time you receive this, you're about to graduate college or you have already graduated. I can't do math, so I hope you're much better at it than I am. I hope you got into Amherst! If you didn't, that's okay, but I really hope you took advantage of your college experience and lived life to the fullest (while still being responsible). You better have gotten a job by now (hopefully working with animals somewhere)! I'm still 17, so I'm waiting to turn 18 to apply at the Amazon job mommy works at. By the way, how are mommy and daddy?? I really hope you've been helping them out a lot and making sure they're okay. Lately school has been stressing me out a bit. AP chem feels impossible, and I have no time for myself or my family anymore. It's still the beginning of November, but I'm already freaking out about the AP exam that I'm really hoping and praying you passed with at LEAST a 4 (hopefully 5 though). Are you still as hard on yourself as I am?? Honestly, I hope not. It kind of sucks trying to be "perfect" all the time... I hope you've taken a chill pill and decided not to worry too much about things. Hey... are you still attending therapy?? If you're not, I hope you're still thinking about it and the things Dr. Lauren and I went through because they're really important and have helped me by miles. Mila, I hope by this time you have stopped obsessing over how you look. Right now, I feel pretty ugly. I've been wanting to do my eyebrows since 10 billion years ago, but I have decided to wait for Christmas so I'm just gonna have to look like a man troll for some time. I also need to wax my mustache, but I've been too scared, because the wax is kind of iffy... sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. I keep saying I want lip fillers and a nose job in the future, but I hope you've learned to love yourself enough to the point where you think opposite of me. If not... I'm really sorry if I failed you... you won't disappoint me if you get work done on your face, but I just really don't want you to. Just know you're beautiful and gorgeous, and I love you! Are you still friends with Ariana from Mr. Nguyen's math class?! Probably not... but HOPEFULLY! I've been asking too many questions... Let me tell you about MY day or week. Today mommy bought me a doughnut. I wanted the white icing, but so did Gui. Mommy made me choose top or bottom, and I chose bottom. I won the doughnut I wanted, but because I wanted to be nice, I still chose the strawberry icing doughnut and it was just as delicious! It's still 10:30am, so not much has happened to me today. I am hoping to complete my schoolwork pretty early so that I can go outside for a bit today and stay with mommy and Matheus. Matheus has been a REAL pain. He's been crying for attention, and wants to grab everything. I'm sure he's much better now that he's six though. Oh! That just rmeinded me! Has Gui found his airpods?? I really hope COVID-19 is over and that nothing is too horrible. This coronavirus has not been fun at ALL. I only saw Cristian like 4 times in the span of 8 months. Crazy... right? Gui has been annoying as well, but you already know that's just in his nature. I hope you guys have gotten closer though. Also, I hope you've been helping him with high school and college applications. Yesterday was election day and no one knows who's president. Honestly I don't really care too much, but I reaaaally hope it's Biden. I wonder who's president now... hopefully a woman! Anyway... I don't know what else to say. I just hope that you're happy, achieved the many goals I have, stopped worrying, and that you're enjoying your best life. Take care, Mila... I love you... stay safe and don't forget to smile ;) Best, 17 year old Mila <333