A letter from June 26th, 2020

Dear FutureMe, if you're reading this- well done, the 2020 you is proud of how far you've came and haven't given up. So I've just been reading so many public letters, and I'll try my best to make it as much ME as I can, rather than focusing on the other letters as a template because this is the whole point, right? Sending it to yourself to remind you of how you were like. I hope you're doing well. I hope you're the living the happiest life, and are not wasting any days or chances that you're lucky to have. I hope you've kept being fit and haven't given up your exercising and eating healthier because ****, you were unhealthy haha. The past you is currently stuck in quarantine. Coronavirus has taken over the world and you're stuck. Stuck at home, stuck with your life. Just stuck. A lot has happened through this quarantine time to be quite honest. It's about to be July, and the last time I've been at college was.. Well, March 17th!! You've always wished school was over and you didn't have to go anymore, but being honest, I miss it. I miss my friends, even my course. I went from graphic design at the beginning of this academic year, to do Music!! Wtaf!! But hey guess what, in September you're doing a Business course even tho you've failed business at GCSEs lmao. Do you remember when you were properly in love for the first time? It all started as a joke, few weeks before lockdown. Your friends kept telling you how cute you two would be together? And you decided to prank them, that you do actually like each other? And then you've realised that you've fallen in love with each other? And then you were waiting for lockdown to be over so that you can meet and see what it would be like if you were together? But before lockdown ended, he decided he doesn't actually love you anymore, and you were just being used, and that he didnt need you anymore? Because he said that he only felt like he loved you because you were there for him when he was having a **** life, and now that it's getting better, he realised he doesn't have feelings for you anymore? You were heartbroken. After all the times he told you he loved you, and that you were the best thing that has happened in his life. After all the secrets you've told him, especially the fact that you don't believe in true love, and he knew it. HE FRICKING KNEW IT yet still did this to you. The fact that you overcame the feeling, went out of your comfort zone to fall for someone. And he did this. You know what was even worse? I get it, he lost feelings and I can't control them. I totally get it. But he told me to MESSAGE ANOTHER PERSON FOR AN EXPLANATION BECAUSE HE CANT BE BOTHERED TO TELL ME. Like... who does that? Especially to someone that they've once 'loved'. You're currently trying so hard to overcome this. One days you feel like you're over it, and you're doing so great, but other days you're crying over him like mad. I just hope he realises that I was too good for him and that he ruined what we could of had. He even once said 'I can't let you go, knowing that I could have done so much more but I haven't.' Lesson learnt; don't fall for someone's words unless you know they're being honest. Except.. they felt like they were. Anyway, you're currently going through a mad Catfish and the Bottlemen obsession, and exercising. You're doing amazing being healthier, you know? You've always given up very fast, but this time you've kept it going for 3 months!! Yeah, sometimes you have your cheat days, ups and downs, BUT DUDE, YOU EXERCISE AT LEAST 4 DAYS A WEEK LIKE, YOU'RE HONESTLY AMAZING. If you're back to eating unhealthy etc, please remember how good you felt when you've been loosing weight and feeling SO BLOODY GOOD IN YOUR BODY EVEN THO YOU WEREN'T PERFECT!!! And you know what, You've always hated my body and a lot about yourself, but as you're writing this, you've never felt so good about your body for so long. You're literally glowing :) You're also smiling just writing this hehe. I hope you're in love with someone forever at the moment. I hope you're living your best life and you're not scared of everything cause honestly, you were a ***** haha. Are you living in London like you were planning to do so for uni? Are you doing anything along the lines of Music Business, or just Music Industry as you were planning for the past few years? Or have you done something that includes travelling like you're dreaming of right now? If you are reading this, have you drank water today? When was the last time you've had a self care time? When was the last time you've had a whole pizza to yourself? I bet you're having one as you're reading this bless haha. Who are your friends? Are they anything like your Ferneley group? College group? How is your mum? Is she still working quite a lot? Has she bought a house and a dog? How's nan? Is she still doing gardening everyday? How is Kacper? Is he finally a paramedic? I'm proud of him you know. I really am. And of mum. Very proud. :) Has your dad had any contact with you? I doubt, he hasn't for like 10 years already haha, whatever, we don't need people like him in our life do we. Positive vibes only. :) Yesterday you woke up at 3;30am just to bike to the other side of Melton to take sunrise photos with DeeDee hahah you're mad, it was definitely worth it though :) If you're having a hard time right now, please take it easy. Everything will be fine, okay? You already have went through so much, but you're strong and you've managed it for.. 23? years? Maybe 22, I'm not quite sure hahah, maths is not my subject. I think this is everything I've wanted to tell you right now. You're probably crying whilst reading this. The past Wees is very proud of the future Wees. Please live big, fulfil your dreams and most importantly, LOVE YOURSELF BECAUSE YOU MAY NOT THINK IT RIGHT NOW, YOU ARE ABSOLUTELY AMAZING AND YOU HAVE TO LIVE FOR YOURSELF AND NOT ANYONE ELSE!! Don't waste the life you were given. if you're a stranger reading this from the public letters, hello! you're also doing amazing, you're beautiful inside and out, and you should smile more. Live your life, take every opportunity you can, and if you have no idea what do to with your life, just wing it. Don't think of future, (ironic ik, this is a future letter) but think about what you could be doing now to make you happy!!! i love you x W x