A letter from May 30th, 2020

Dear FutureMe, I'm 14 and it's 3:14 AM for the last 2 hours I've been laying in bed thinking. Now some people may call it overthinking but tbh I don't think I'm overthinking I'm just scared. I got everything that I looked forward to in the past but now that I have it. I'm scared of messing up. I thought I would be a lot happier if I got what I looked forward to in the past but I'm not . For example while being a 7th grader on the bowie middle school dance team I looked up to the captains and I wanted to be a captain next year well at the end of the year we had online audions bc of covid and about a week after the audition I got one of the captains I was so excited but now I'm scared. What if I'm a bad captain? What if I can't do it? Another example is that I want to be in the military after I graduate high school and the after the military be a police officer but I'm worried I won't make it there and mess up. I'm stress, I'm scared, I feel depressed the present and the future scares me ngl but this is a letter to me in 2025 and today's is may 30 2020 but Emily you better be in the military by now ~ from your past self 2020