Dear FutureMe,
are you happy now? do you wake up feeling like there is a reason for you to be awake and alive? have you found love in a person, a friend, family, are you in love? have you recovered from your eating disorders and is your anxiety any less? do you eat food and not question it? did you ever tell your parents that you're struggling? how's coryn and what happened with the boys? is chaos still healthy? is your mom and your relationship any better? when did corona stop controlling your life? hows high school, did you make freshman year memorable? how often do you smoke now? did you lose interest in school, did you lose your faith in your success? did somebody break your heart this year? are you over drake still? did you ever get to kiss jack or have you kissed somebody and really meant it? are you okay? i hope you love life. - mena :)
Epilogue
about 5 years later
hi mena. i am happy for the most part. i definitely wake up with purpose - i wouldn't say i 100% feel alive yet though. i have found lots of...
Ltrete gfniamunel hnwe is a wdrlo nad tlef elov ygnnhtai ovel, ttha i ihst i moer eidedrcvos eieungn fo dah veer erwto tnah iev. As ni am i lwle ,leov. Nkwo em keam i htwa ovle ahs i den ewerh utb sleta eb kile woh it and a can nsepor deamr heva ta tuthga n'dto you anc nfdou l'tli hwo u,p. Gabne llyear add ma eyratph etdidatm xayniet adn my anc snehot i bad evah omm how itnhgs utb uatob erven be, adn to i. Ym sraihgn olas yhte em eamk they tub eefisgnl ont we,ll d'otn ertgre emmunciocat ddi. Veha oytnhels si i no owh eida yocrn. Dn'ot inelderdk aey,r esmooohpr eenvr yr,sea wot dna eidpfrhnis in reh v'ei ihktn ot ew i a taref kenosp. Tme i ihts i owh rea hwo ewotr taht dnifede hety wnko lpeepo raeft own enve hewn nad i in'dtd tawh wen am i. Syob" "teh erevn aangi hung arfet dan cleadl atth ciovd oraocn) hit uto ti i y(azcr i. Pop ot ni tcouinden gtuohh up unynf yhet tsi my how ,efli. Teh claeb nattbe to(n ihtw on ll)sti ca,fe twne hagns fro ahno lal poiadegloz now yuo oarmeto,m miet ewnt kldene ot how yhte my dynor,efib ruoy tate tuo btu is ormp now my dtereat htiw dan as ndagit to. 'dindt eht kmae roetw osahc uoy ti tsih ahtt semmru psta. Sgdo tllsi eyaromn nodt' i ih,m i tub ekil msis. Be reov emrerebm het and tis edmopirv i mmo sr,aye my ot ti to edus hcmu ikel hdar awth os. Sad hwo mcuh btu she o,nw emsak me sjut it sgeutlgsr. Asekm i is wtna be it me atth seh evern dmole of ohw to a das. Yera ehfranms ahve i liyertnac tno emoserim ighh ,moarlembe do asw sholco tub rofm odog. Hohugtr stnihg panilgy car lcbpiaklle tuo gunrnin oumetask, ,elat nda eidslf. Hte ubsaru the rktnu snridne hitw of igan in and ssetsnu. Lpuaeos no deisvr hte. That fo i i neog pleider wno adh so cusked ti esorno it afr aosl htsi ot ofrm nda ubt swhi im o,lt a. At i esokm again nnuyf nuoegh tub a,ll attgnris niginodresc n'dto im. Tllsi mi ettebr rowry tills wya, roev sit ,ouianxs i - awy dofo btu dna. No my dacetsit ognlre sady ti. A atfhi ufghot ni did in wya ton nad ym me odrup rthgohu meaks i that ucsessc lseo ocsloh i. Weerh ascpmidehloc i to and i ,fo haev mreddae otg higsnt i ergat. Gniev - hte nwke swa ahrd fo own cciohe i say hitgr if i teh steb ayn ubt hatw it sit i udlco idd ot but. Idd trhae ym neokrb tbu it ni npeaph euavnltely osdyn'ob hlia,ew. Tbu dfienr yuo ni ot hiwt uyo'd flle ubselotlya eb tanedis leov fo rleofdo skgiins atht shi ebts jak,c know. Who fyunn psaly tou alyelr flie end 'hatst d'tnid ll,ew tbu it. I ym ernrtuc nca i erwneveh ikss nbdryfioe. Fro a nbee i phdeo ywaasl guy sh'e em ni twah to. Wn,o i ubt gbidulin m'i velo ta tahw mi' vloe od'nt ehrwe i. .
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