A letter from May 12th, 2020

Dear Future me, Hey. It's you. I'm currently 14 years old and experiencing the Covid-19 pandemic. This is honestly kind of overwhelming to write because I don't even know what to say to myself 5 years into the future. I mean, a lot can change in a year so just imagine what would change in 5. By this point I would have probably graduated high school. That is, if I haven't dropped out. I mean you never know. I can be unpredictable. Anyway, are you going to college? Do you know what you want to do yet? I really truly hope you read this letter. I want you to remember what you want at 14. I want to move to somewhere I would really want to live. I want to live with people I love, and I want to do what I love. What makes me happy. I really hope that you are living the life you have always wanted to. You're probably 19 by this point. I hope you haven't decided to settle for an average life. Seriously. I know I probably sound really stupid. But have you fallen in love yet? Have you had a serious relationship yet? I wonder how my family is. I wonder how I look at 19. I should probably tell you about my life now. I think it's fun to compare myself to the past. I'll give you a little day in the life of 14 year old Skylar. Well, first of all I don't wake up until 3pm. Quarantine has completely rid me of any form of motivation so when I wake up I just eat and go on my phone for hours. Then I watch something until I fall asleep until around 6am. And then the cycle repeats. It's lonely. God, I would literally do anything to be back in school. Since Elearning began I lost the motivation to do my school work. I'm genuinely concerned I am going to fail the 8th grade. How sad would that be. I mean it's literally an entire quarter of work missing and school ends at the end of this month. I also start high school this coming school year. I am not prepared in the slightest. I don't know how worried I should be. I am especially afraid of the first day. I don't know my way around the school, I literally have like 3 close friends right now and I might not even have any by the time school starts. I guess it won't really matter in the end, but right now it kind of does. Right now my closest friends are Zach, Gia, and Jazlyn. Of course there is Darby and Bella but I haven't heard from Bella in a good while and Darby is just doing her own thing. I think that when I get to high school I will fit in with a whole new crowd. Who knows, by the time I'm 19 I could be completely rebranded. I wonder what I look like. Who my friends are, or were. There is a five year difference between us. That is five years worth of experiences, friends, boyfriends or girlfriends, and who knows what else. I wonder what the effect corona virus ended up having in the long run. Are things different? 2020 has been a very... extreme year. That is the best word I can use to describe it. It is full of new beginnings, just everything new. 2020 is the craziest year I have ever experienced. I wonder what the future holds though. I hope it's better than this trash dump of a year. I wonder if you are still friends with Darby. I always knew it was unrealistic for me to stay friends with the people I had in my life in middle school, it's just impossible. But with Darby I always felt like she would stay in my life one way or another. I hope we haven't drifted to much. But I wouldn't be too surprised. Change happens. Have you advanced spiritually? I hope you are still working on yourself and haven't forgotten your aspirations. I also hope you are doing well in general. Family wise, I have gotten really close with my mom lately. She's like my best friend. Sometimes she tells me things I wish I didn't know though. My brother is 11 and still as annoying as always. Sometimes we get so bored, that we bond. It's strange haha. My dad ( Bryan ) is in and out. I rarely see him, I am going to his house this week though so that he can help me catch up on school which I am VERY VERY behind on. Anyways, I am so tired because it is 3am and I am also running out of things to say. I have a terrible headache from staring at this computer so long so I am gonna end this here. I hope 2025 is better than whatever the **** I am experiencing now. - May 12, 2020. 3:30am.