A letter from May 7th, 2020

Peaceful right?

Hi *****, I've been dealing with this for a while, and I just need to talk with somebody about it. I think that I may be Lesbian or Bi. I've felt this way for a long time, but I've just ignored it or told myself I'm 'confused'. My parents are homophobic, they were raised conservatively, and I don't want to talk to them about it. They don't know yet. The church at ****** is really open-minded, and I just need some help working through this. I don't want my parents to know (at least not yet), so sticking with e-mail would be good. Thank you for being there, ***** That's the letter we just sent to our pastor. If not now, when? Sure, it's Coronavirus. Sure, I'm quarantined in with my homophobic parents. Sure, I have absolutely nowhere to go and no resources to speak of. Sure, I'm currently sitting in a closet (really) crying. Sure, I'm mentally probably not ready for this. But, if not now, when? Wherever you are, good luck. And I love you. And so. does. God. -You a year ago

Epilogue

2 days later

Hi dearie,

Well, it's a been a year, that's for sure. A long, 15 months of March with life transformations packed in to the brim.

I suppose you'll...

An wnat atdeup. . . M,a to be fpscicie e,reuq nexualpsa i eeind,d. Biyrnnnoa uto urigfe ro ahtt 4 to ell,w enotarh sa moshtn 5 gutohh koot and. Gsnleti and thta i eht eitm rfo a no,w f,serh tfris vgie eo,n bnudrmeceenu ireahoup dna wen me hvea alauct ewn mean nergde opnurosn a.
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Wsa msmuer the. . . Hte oot asw allf go,ln nad. Dna dan rpneats tneh ivel ,wirnet ofr my rteunr mtei iwht het meca ot to. . . I tdd'ni. Ushr to ekew tnhe a a itehr tfle den dna asllc fo l,riefe tfircna on mrof nda onattsnc temh of eacm tou i napic het,m. Dnmgansusdireitn nad nda de,pe lseaurf eepd etpxce to me. C,npamyo ht,eer sukct i and spend ot htsnom htwi fcasiutgnof thiw ot emso dfnou ernrut lvie di'dtn tierh ,so erbsemm dtnesai fyimla. I'ts eneb and eovyll.
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Tgsinh haev vaeh scertyel ot,o you as aym hoetr hegadnc dxectepe. Awht trnpaes sdertha ryoanme in ,ind)m gotuh(h ofr a otn etwse 'mi ryuo hwich ym ym 'gdso ekep i swa tapr taisnrhic siirntach oevl od rteoffs a ot is of paaetpicer. I heva nv(ee yan mofr in how a,sec itsll eevdpelo,d nhtisg henw tath aetndgsre evre to h)ypap hatw fdeth,is not dan dan i flsme,y i'm b,e deus yanm eihprap ahve wheli nidf i ntah been utholrghyo dna.
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Eth aysw ,tfeuru luhofpe in i'm rfo smeo. Bauto lsao msepisitisc eplant sa dna eoph eht a het nad xanoius of whleo. Sgnefri cs,edsro ht?gir.
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Ntvialadoi arde inngdse my ot dan l,evo ,uyo aentp,cacce bakc.

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