A letter from May 7th, 2020

Peaceful right?

Hi *****, I've been dealing with this for a while, and I just need to talk with somebody about it. I think that I may be Lesbian or Bi. I've felt this way for a long time, but I've just ignored it or told myself I'm 'confused'. My parents are homophobic, they were raised conservatively, and I don't want to talk to them about it. They don't know yet. The church at ****** is really open-minded, and I just need some help working through this. I don't want my parents to know (at least not yet), so sticking with e-mail would be good. Thank you for being there, ***** That's the letter we just sent to our pastor. If not now, when? Sure, it's Coronavirus. Sure, I'm quarantined in with my homophobic parents. Sure, I have absolutely nowhere to go and no resources to speak of. Sure, I'm currently sitting in a closet (really) crying. Sure, I'm mentally probably not ready for this. But, if not now, when? Wherever you are, good luck. And I love you. And so. does. God. -You a year ago

Epilogue

2 days later

Hi dearie,

Well, it's a been a year, that's for sure. A long, 15 months of March with life transformations packed in to the brim.

I suppose you'll...

Watn putaed na. . . I,eeddn ,am eb i leuasnpax u,ereq ipescfci ot. Sa naoehrt out shnotm taht fguire inraynbon or 4 ot 5 dan thuhog ,well took. A name ,wno ievg luatac nad isftr rnegde htta upoonnsr i ewn me mdrnceebenuu mtei ehav srhfe, euarihop etgnlsi adn eht o,en a ewn orf.
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Hte rsumem aws. . . Het too dan flla ,gnlo was. Rteunr the trniw,e nda dna eacm ehtn ivle rof to wthi itme ym rtpnaes to. . . D'dint i. Ntnotsca mrof of herti adn nrifcat caem allcs uot a ot i shur of and eftl acnpi etnh mteh, feielr, ekew tmeh no end a. Ot genadsntinsrdmui dna peed em ee,dp eptxce nda alsrufe. Ot hreti kcstu eivl oesm reutnr heter, iwht depns ,os eemmbsr ndtaise to dna hsntmo utocfgfiasn mlfyai n,ypmcao td'idn ithw i oundf. Volyle nad ebne it's.
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Aedhncg troeh aym cytrlees aevh ctpxeeed sa veah tnshig t,oo oyu. Di,)mn my rtfefso out(hgh si esetw do oevl saw arpt fo asnrpet hncrasiit a im' i royu whta rtshade rpacetpaie nto ogd's rof whchi ni a ym peke to aitihncrs rmnoaey. Eebn eipaprh tishf,de any frmo rtdesegna nda n(eev ever enwh aehv wtah i in )phpay i tath fidn eilhw many ,eb nda m,ylefs ,saec hwo ot lislt m'i vaeh ngtish edvdoelep, i nad oogtlhhyru nhta nto sued.
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Ni wsya hte oems m'i rteuu,f rof oulfeph. Ohep adn tbuao and oasl saoixnu fo a as naetlp oewlh eht the sispmticeis. Einsgfr seroc,sd rgit?h.
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Cakb oev,l to engsind and c,aecpetcna my ader ,ouy lniadovati.

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