A letter from May 7th, 2020

Peaceful right?

Hi *****, I've been dealing with this for a while, and I just need to talk with somebody about it. I think that I may be Lesbian or Bi. I've felt this way for a long time, but I've just ignored it or told myself I'm 'confused'. My parents are homophobic, they were raised conservatively, and I don't want to talk to them about it. They don't know yet. The church at ****** is really open-minded, and I just need some help working through this. I don't want my parents to know (at least not yet), so sticking with e-mail would be good. Thank you for being there, ***** That's the letter we just sent to our pastor. If not now, when? Sure, it's Coronavirus. Sure, I'm quarantined in with my homophobic parents. Sure, I have absolutely nowhere to go and no resources to speak of. Sure, I'm currently sitting in a closet (really) crying. Sure, I'm mentally probably not ready for this. But, if not now, when? Wherever you are, good luck. And I love you. And so. does. God. -You a year ago

Epilogue

2 days later

Hi dearie,

Well, it's a been a year, that's for sure. A long, 15 months of March with life transformations packed in to the brim.

I suppose you'll...

Tanw edtpau an. . . Uqer,e eb i ot dedni,e pccefsii xeslaaupn ,am. Htat mothns nroyabnin to tnhaoer took or 4 efrugi tuo ,llew as 5 htgouh adn. Teh uosnonpr em eno, eivg runebdcnueme aemn a i taht tgenlsi time uhirpaeo adn ewn a dan for wen vhea fhrs,e rtifs gnrede o,wn lauact.
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The mermus asw. . . Teh oto dan asw lalf go,nl. Rasnpte rof meit teh dna mcea iwth my dna ot ilev ot wti,ren rreutn ehnt. . . I nditd'. Wkee i tlef osntantc canip a fo a usrh omfr nhte dan riteh on th,me lclsa meca to ,rfeeil fo edn uto emht dan atrfnic. Insegnsmtriduadn eepd usalref dan nda ot ,deep xecpet me. Re,hte hwti nofud cifatngfuos tkcsu erurtn editnas ,os nda np,mocya teirh ot msbreem ivle mtsnoh di'ndt to miyfal smoe dpsne htiw i. Enbe i'st lovyel adn.
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Sletcyre ctexdeep mya vhae otreh uoy tgnshi hvae hcnadeg to,o as. Do whhic twsee of a twah yoru tarp aetsrpn for voel nomraye my 'sgdo iatsihrnc si aws catieeprap di,)mn to tciharins in my dhstaer huthgo( not tfsefor ekpe i'm i a. Elededp,vo nay ot fomr heiprap i slilt ymna hnew thsing glooyrhhut dna enev( i phyp)a sdeu thta rvee in eb, nda i tahw lwhei tnah ec,as el,fmys been ethds,fi ton nda eangdetsr ahev ahev m'i how dfni.
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Swya ni r,uufet orf oems mi' teh plfohue. Sa oeph sola teh nda of osaniux dan lehow eth alepnt spcissimtie uaotb a. Gfneris tig?rh cso,reds.
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,aateccenpc elvo, raed acbk ym dna andvloiait ot endnsig ,yuo.

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