A letter from May 7th, 2020

Peaceful right?

Hi *****, I've been dealing with this for a while, and I just need to talk with somebody about it. I think that I may be Lesbian or Bi. I've felt this way for a long time, but I've just ignored it or told myself I'm 'confused'. My parents are homophobic, they were raised conservatively, and I don't want to talk to them about it. They don't know yet. The church at ****** is really open-minded, and I just need some help working through this. I don't want my parents to know (at least not yet), so sticking with e-mail would be good. Thank you for being there, ***** That's the letter we just sent to our pastor. If not now, when? Sure, it's Coronavirus. Sure, I'm quarantined in with my homophobic parents. Sure, I have absolutely nowhere to go and no resources to speak of. Sure, I'm currently sitting in a closet (really) crying. Sure, I'm mentally probably not ready for this. But, if not now, when? Wherever you are, good luck. And I love you. And so. does. God. -You a year ago

Epilogue

2 days later

Hi dearie,

Well, it's a been a year, that's for sure. A long, 15 months of March with life transformations packed in to the brim.

I suppose you'll...

Wtan an deutap. . . Ot ,diened eb seaaunxpl i uerq,e cifipsec ,ma. Or nbynoirna onrehta hmntso adn hatt ouhgth tou ktoo w,ell to 4 eirfug 5 sa. Heav nmae a nwe oerihapu dan wo,n orf itrfs geednr tiem unnoorsp dan eth ttha gvei em gsieltn i eno, ,refhs caltau a wne eunubermcdne.
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Asw urmems teh. . . Flal dna saw too the ogn,l. Then ym twhi orf ot mite dan ot adn eptrnsa t,weinr utenrr het eliv eamc. . . Ind'td i. Nda of a on ,ehmt ned i of etfl pinac eekw ofrm thne ehmt rtcnaif ncatotns amec to thire a out surh lscla adn efreli,. Eecxtp ot sningramsdeiudtn and deep em ,pdee eulfrsa and. Lfimay tdn'di ednsp eivl osem ihwt so, shmotn ot her,et enasitd mresmeb i apyc,mno ctkus wthi nruetr ierht nfdou fuicnofsagt adn ot. Neeb nda sit' lyveol.
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,oot mya lstycere tceepdex avhe evah shntig threo uoy hdcgnae as. Yornaem u(hhotg fo a my aticnhisr for enasrpt eepk to irpcepaate love tpar chhiw is in iianctrsh trheasd my wsa athw mi)n,d i tesew ont yruo gsd'o a od m'i tseorff. Ohtlrhouyg haev difst,he asc,e bnee edpdevo,le eb, pap)hy feys,ml nda yna dues idfn litls m'i i i omfr wnhe dna ont ymna atwh tnegdsare eevr sngith ot ahtt how and elhwi ntha i veha ev(en riehppa ni.
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Omse rfo uhfloep 'im in uefrt,u wsya eht. Axnsiou dna abtuo of dna salo eht pssmitcsiie nlepta leowh a het sa epoh. S,dcoers nrgsfei iht?gr.
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Sending my dna to akbc iaoditnlav uy,o lveo, drea ,patnccceea.

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