A letter from May 7th, 2020

Peaceful right?

Hi *****, I've been dealing with this for a while, and I just need to talk with somebody about it. I think that I may be Lesbian or Bi. I've felt this way for a long time, but I've just ignored it or told myself I'm 'confused'. My parents are homophobic, they were raised conservatively, and I don't want to talk to them about it. They don't know yet. The church at ****** is really open-minded, and I just need some help working through this. I don't want my parents to know (at least not yet), so sticking with e-mail would be good. Thank you for being there, ***** That's the letter we just sent to our pastor. If not now, when? Sure, it's Coronavirus. Sure, I'm quarantined in with my homophobic parents. Sure, I have absolutely nowhere to go and no resources to speak of. Sure, I'm currently sitting in a closet (really) crying. Sure, I'm mentally probably not ready for this. But, if not now, when? Wherever you are, good luck. And I love you. And so. does. God. -You a year ago

Epilogue

2 days later

Hi dearie,

Well, it's a been a year, that's for sure. A long, 15 months of March with life transformations packed in to the brim.

I suppose you'll...

Wnat uedapt na. . . I pficsice m,a eb eedin,d eualpnsax qe,uer ot. Otko tou reiufg 4 mhtnos 5 adn to well, ro nerohat sa hogtuh ninyaonrb ttha. Nad naem a uuencemdnerb inesgtl a tsrif me iegv ctuala dna reegnd nwe ow,n aevh enw rfo oeiuprah i frhe,s teh that ,one oonupnsr imte.
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Was uemsrm the. . . Too eht was nad ,lnog lalf. Levi ym nad enturr rfo npteasr rtinw,e thwi cmea to enht item dan to hte. . . T'dind i. Eekw fo thme, dna caem nda rtieh cniatrf eflt rfmo ot end tcnsnaot cpnai tuo a i fo no ruhs neth ,frelei llcas a hetm. Dsrintsamniedgnu nda uarelsf xctpee em pdee, dna ot deep. Ot neturr wtih ietrh dna i tmonsh vlie reesmmb semo hiwt sftofgaiucn ot eeth,r etnsdai lyfmai nduof endps mc,aonpy t'idnd cstuk ,os. Si't bnee vylelo nda.
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Cdtxpeee yam uoy ,too sa eelstryc cgadneh eahv haev itgnsh ohert. 'mi ht(ugoh od a pcepatirae hchwi my i snhiaitcr is vleo sahterd a o'sdg thscniiar eyramno otn my mdn),i netsapr prta of ffortse ot eekp oyru for hatw eetsw saw ni. Vne(e haev in fy,mels hrlgouhtyo epo,vdleed 'mi dinf nda fh,dsite uesd i e,acs ternsegad apephir i i dan nhtisg hwo aymn nay nebe wtah be, wehli eevr thta hvea ofmr tahn ot yh)pap not itsll nad hwne.
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Hfpoule teh in fueutr, semo mi' sawy rfo. Xsuiaon a of nda dan hope as paletn salo teh eth aoubt wleho mitsceisisp. Gfsenir hrtig? d,coress.
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Kbac o,yu eard ot vndolaitai gdienns eccca,pnaet my dna ,loev.

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