A letter from May 7th, 2020

Peaceful right?

Hi *****, I've been dealing with this for a while, and I just need to talk with somebody about it. I think that I may be Lesbian or Bi. I've felt this way for a long time, but I've just ignored it or told myself I'm 'confused'. My parents are homophobic, they were raised conservatively, and I don't want to talk to them about it. They don't know yet. The church at ****** is really open-minded, and I just need some help working through this. I don't want my parents to know (at least not yet), so sticking with e-mail would be good. Thank you for being there, ***** That's the letter we just sent to our pastor. If not now, when? Sure, it's Coronavirus. Sure, I'm quarantined in with my homophobic parents. Sure, I have absolutely nowhere to go and no resources to speak of. Sure, I'm currently sitting in a closet (really) crying. Sure, I'm mentally probably not ready for this. But, if not now, when? Wherever you are, good luck. And I love you. And so. does. God. -You a year ago

Epilogue

2 days later

Hi dearie,

Well, it's a been a year, that's for sure. A long, 15 months of March with life transformations packed in to the brim.

I suppose you'll...

Epdatu na tanw. . . I eicifcsp ,ma edn,ide alsenapux q,erue ot be. Sa okto htguoh brnyoinan 5 retoahn to erfgiu atth nad elwl, ohtnms otu ro 4. Dna edengr a acluta htta a wne veha dmunebneeucr ,own nad n,eo srnuopon mnea new teh eimt fstri ngstlie rof me i uriapoeh ,srehf evig.
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Eth umrsem asw. . . Llfa too asw nog,l eht nda. Rof adn teh to veli wtih nad mtei tiewrn, my ot nrertu htne ecam astenrp. . . I ndti'd. I fetl a kwee rfom neth nad anscontt cipan erei,lf maec to no fo mh,te of uto den nriatcf lcasl ithre rush adn a hmte. Ee,pd depe dan me and isdedismgratunnn esufarl eectxp ot. Ktucs snepd iwth cpyan,om ihrte dnfou i oems dna ,so ,three htnmos tociffungsa eutrrn rmsmbee ihwt ot iymfla itdn'd leiv snaited to. 'tis dna lvolye nbee.
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Etrho sa sinhgt gnheadc t,oo oyu vahe eahv etrlyesc eeecxdtp amy. Sanerpt oelv intchrasi of a do a htu(goh ruyo to in swa i prat areppiceta eepk ogds' tfrseof hwat nto yamreno ym ym tewes )md,in ofr hiwch tiahircns mi' is hasdter. Yan and slilt (vene i ni adn tahw whne ttah i deus wlhie to ynma ec,as hwo avhe ppyh)a ndfi i e,b vhae guhhrtyolo htan tfed,his otn rvee 'mi ofrm dnaretseg fmesl,y tngshi nad epdveel,od arhiepp been.
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Puhofle fru,ute yswa the for mose in 'mi. Butao sa teh adn lewoh teh hope a osla dan fo aneplt etsiispmisc nsuaoxi. Th?igr scdoser, sfgneir.
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Adre dan yuo, ym ca,aecnpetc ot noiialavdt insdeng bkac oe,vl.

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