A letter from May 7th, 2020

Peaceful right?

Hi *****, I've been dealing with this for a while, and I just need to talk with somebody about it. I think that I may be Lesbian or Bi. I've felt this way for a long time, but I've just ignored it or told myself I'm 'confused'. My parents are homophobic, they were raised conservatively, and I don't want to talk to them about it. They don't know yet. The church at ****** is really open-minded, and I just need some help working through this. I don't want my parents to know (at least not yet), so sticking with e-mail would be good. Thank you for being there, ***** That's the letter we just sent to our pastor. If not now, when? Sure, it's Coronavirus. Sure, I'm quarantined in with my homophobic parents. Sure, I have absolutely nowhere to go and no resources to speak of. Sure, I'm currently sitting in a closet (really) crying. Sure, I'm mentally probably not ready for this. But, if not now, when? Wherever you are, good luck. And I love you. And so. does. God. -You a year ago

Epilogue

2 days later

Hi dearie,

Well, it's a been a year, that's for sure. A long, 15 months of March with life transformations packed in to the brim.

I suppose you'll...

Na tnaw epdaut. . . A,m be dn,eied ot pelunxsaa cfisepic i euq,re. Rfigue rbyiaonnn nerohat onmsht tou sa ot thgohu 4 ro nad took lew,l 5 that. Ahev vgie ewn hfse,r aemn ewn a teh eno, fsrti i ietm a me utacal for adn ingstle cedrbunmueen osonurnp htta adn eedrgn rhepioau no,w.
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Eth wsa mursem. . . Lfla teh too swa adn o,nlg. Eth elvi ot rnruet nhet nda ,eitrnw my nda hwti aspnter fro to meca meit. . . I tid'nd. Irlee,f a hetn of m,eht ipanc tlef otu i nda amce to cllsa rmof wkee etmh dne nda no shru fo tnnaotsc a their itcrfan. Adn ot ndnrtissdnueagmi epde, uesafrl me tepxec nda peed. And nmhsto to epsdn ,oympacn hiret wtih eet,rh ifcgtafnuos s,o ivel sbmeerm tdid'n tsuck to smeo rutner i saientd liymaf twhi onufd. Llevyo been and tis'.
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Ohret may vhea ehagcdn hisngt sa lcryseet veha oo,t ectpexde ouy. Rtap ryuo wsete i to a in saw hrsntaiic oryamne naertps 'im in,md) (uthhgo ym etarhsd fo a my is otn peek rof tawh levo atprpaceie ds'og fftoesr hntsariic ciwhh do. Hvea tno ntha hiperpa ndfi tihfsde, dna e(evn nda to i dgrasenet and tath i itlsl i p)ahpy amyn thwa urholohgyt veha tihsng wenh m'i seud eben iwhle mrfo be, sce,a sm,efly eldodpv,ee ni yna owh vree.
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Im' ofr the soem syaw hlpouef ni uturfe,. Of snxaiuo oasl hte as a uboat mspisisetci oelwh tealnp adn dna the ehop. Se,osdrc ?trgih efrsnig.
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Ader bcak caapcee,nct my v,leo to dgisenn nad u,oy vilntdoaia.

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