A letter from May 7th, 2020

Peaceful right?

Hi *****, I've been dealing with this for a while, and I just need to talk with somebody about it. I think that I may be Lesbian or Bi. I've felt this way for a long time, but I've just ignored it or told myself I'm 'confused'. My parents are homophobic, they were raised conservatively, and I don't want to talk to them about it. They don't know yet. The church at ****** is really open-minded, and I just need some help working through this. I don't want my parents to know (at least not yet), so sticking with e-mail would be good. Thank you for being there, ***** That's the letter we just sent to our pastor. If not now, when? Sure, it's Coronavirus. Sure, I'm quarantined in with my homophobic parents. Sure, I have absolutely nowhere to go and no resources to speak of. Sure, I'm currently sitting in a closet (really) crying. Sure, I'm mentally probably not ready for this. But, if not now, when? Wherever you are, good luck. And I love you. And so. does. God. -You a year ago

Epilogue

2 days later

Hi dearie,

Well, it's a been a year, that's for sure. A long, 15 months of March with life transformations packed in to the brim.

I suppose you'll...

Edutap an twna. . . Eb a,m ei,dden xaelupnas to i icsfpiec qr,uee. Ot ro bnrianoyn 5 oathenr otok rgufie as taht thgohu ,lelw 4 tuo dna months. Ewn istfr i ,oen embeundruenc runnposo veah taht rof uaalct name ,sfrhe em oihapuer a elsignt dan eergnd a onw, new emti dan teh vige.
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Het aws rmusem. . . Gnol, flla saw hte adn oot. Mcea vlie tperans thne to nad rfo teh en,trwi trenru imet my ot nad iwht. . . Ddtn'i i. Sacll telf a rcfiatn dna tem,h ot keew paicn rhsu fo on tehn i aemc rofm tmhe ire,lef out fo a erhti ttcaonns ned nda. Edep aengnrmndidusits dan pexcte ot rfslaue pd,ee me adn. Sbemmer 'ddnit rtneru fylmia hwit vlei iwht idetsan csuitofngfa pcymao,n to hirte tcsku fduon to i dnesp e,hter so, esmo thnosm adn. Nda its' oyevll neeb.
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Rleeytcs ouy petexcde reoth hgndeac amy vahe hstngi as hvae ,oot. Rnsithcai od ym ronmaey si (ohtuhg etrsdah a neprats swa rtap oelv ihsiarnct oertffs stewe i to in chwih mi' of not sgo'd orf eapatcpire a epke my dn)i,m waht uroy. Heppair i ylmse,f mnay nad to nya fdin atth (veen i hvae wlhei ,csea tahn ,dpoeleevd nad eben eavh veer woh uesd gluoyhthor tihnsg wtah nto ,be fshie,td hnew m'i i hapyp) mofr nda gtnresdae llist in.
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I'm in orf oesm the ueftr,u wsya oelpufh. Oanixsu dan eth a sa hte ptlena uaobt fo csmesipitsi eoph dan osla hwleo. Siegnrf htg?ir ,rsscdoe.
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My iensdgn oivnatadil l,veo cbak cact,penaec dna drae to uy,o.

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