A letter from May 7th, 2020

Peaceful right?

Hi *****, I've been dealing with this for a while, and I just need to talk with somebody about it. I think that I may be Lesbian or Bi. I've felt this way for a long time, but I've just ignored it or told myself I'm 'confused'. My parents are homophobic, they were raised conservatively, and I don't want to talk to them about it. They don't know yet. The church at ****** is really open-minded, and I just need some help working through this. I don't want my parents to know (at least not yet), so sticking with e-mail would be good. Thank you for being there, ***** That's the letter we just sent to our pastor. If not now, when? Sure, it's Coronavirus. Sure, I'm quarantined in with my homophobic parents. Sure, I have absolutely nowhere to go and no resources to speak of. Sure, I'm currently sitting in a closet (really) crying. Sure, I'm mentally probably not ready for this. But, if not now, when? Wherever you are, good luck. And I love you. And so. does. God. -You a year ago

Epilogue

2 days later

Hi dearie,

Well, it's a been a year, that's for sure. A long, 15 months of March with life transformations packed in to the brim.

I suppose you'll...

Na tepdua nawt. . . Iesccfip a,m anuxlpase to erqe,u i ede,ndi be. Atth to and ohguht 5 out as or smohtn gireuf l,lwe koto tnroaeh 4 bnanoriyn. Rof gsnleti eo,n rdeneg a new enw aenm ievg em eth tmei ohrieaup hvea e,fshr htta i alatcu nda rbemdencnuue o,nw srfit a rnsopnuo adn.
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Remsmu asw eht. . . ,gnlo flla het wsa adn too. To dan tneh imte acme wthi rneurt dna netpasr wi,nter ym ofr hte levi to. . . Din'dt i. Aclsl kwee ttnaosnc a on fo eirht of ecam ot suhr dan ned tem,h tehn elft mrof ref,iel tmhe a anfrict i ancip otu nad. Nad dpee ot ,pede slfaeru indsmgseirnautnd me nad eextpc. Ithw dnsetia ctksu erntru yflmia ot mbrseme dna ,os eirht tihw omtnsh dspne d'ndit lvei i cyma,pon ugicffatosn fudno eosm ot ete,rh. Ebne and lvlyeo s'ti.
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Hrtoe ycleerst xdpeeect hgdcaen nthgis ,oto as hvae oyu amy aevh. Was is orf waht do rpta uohgt(h cwihh tseparn in i ym ym fo a mrnaeoy ot epke a ovel not sgo'd ruyo etesw rpapieatce adethrs esotffr rictaihns sctahinri )dnm,i mi'. Yhhtoogrlu dan efmsly, i e,b in nfdi to epparhi dna htta neeb 'mi yna s,ifthed ph)apy tlsli een(v eas,c i wath mrof dan otn sithng adnteesgr owh i hvea dep,eedlvo hvae sdeu aynm ihwel hnta erve hwne.
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Uhlpfoe meso teh in ofr e,trfuu yswa mi'. Fo leowh nad uboat elapnt a cssiitismpe osal the ohep het as oxisuan nad. ?trihg dse,ocrs frsnegi.
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Ctaapecnc,e reda bkac adn ,eovl idilovntaa ouy, engsdni my ot.

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