A letter from May 7th, 2020

Peaceful right?

Hi *****, I've been dealing with this for a while, and I just need to talk with somebody about it. I think that I may be Lesbian or Bi. I've felt this way for a long time, but I've just ignored it or told myself I'm 'confused'. My parents are homophobic, they were raised conservatively, and I don't want to talk to them about it. They don't know yet. The church at ****** is really open-minded, and I just need some help working through this. I don't want my parents to know (at least not yet), so sticking with e-mail would be good. Thank you for being there, ***** That's the letter we just sent to our pastor. If not now, when? Sure, it's Coronavirus. Sure, I'm quarantined in with my homophobic parents. Sure, I have absolutely nowhere to go and no resources to speak of. Sure, I'm currently sitting in a closet (really) crying. Sure, I'm mentally probably not ready for this. But, if not now, when? Wherever you are, good luck. And I love you. And so. does. God. -You a year ago

Epilogue

2 days later

Hi dearie,

Well, it's a been a year, that's for sure. A long, 15 months of March with life transformations packed in to the brim.

I suppose you'll...

Na watn tdueap. . . To i sleaunpax ma, ureqe, be dedi,ne cfecisip. Shotmn onnabnryi took and utohhg ifgrue sa 5 raohnte to or out 4 tath el,lw. Reedng new eo,n i frsit eimt new ropuihae dan gvei uactla ,own beucudmennre lnitgse maen haev a a sunnropo and me teh ofr fs,erh ttha.
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Msemru was the. . . Dan n,lgo lfla oot aws eht. ,iwenrt ruetnr meac ot ofr ithw ot nad eht enth my dna nstpaer vile etim. . . I ndt'id. Em,th adn mteh of aclls eflre,i i uto npcia a emac santncto tehn ot mrof a rehti cariftn elft on dan week urhs fo den. Em teepxc easlurf to depe dna nda guimtndniesndras dp,ee. Oiautsnffgc 'ditdn stmnho aop,ycmn smeo to beremsm stcku whti rethe, ihtw udnof yflaim i to nterru epnsd and rihet ntdiaes ievl so,. Vylole dan it's eenb.
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Aym eahv htreo tinsgh veha ,too relesytc ndgcahe yuo sa etdepcex. Of sd'go ym is hohtu(g a stwee pepairctae evol uory iihctsnra m),ndi do twha ym esfftro tnaisirch rsnepat a i'm aptr dtresah nto rof to peek ni i wsa chwih aoemnry. Dna thwa nda wehil ndfi ahtt enwh eev(n py)hap iltsl vhea hluyotgohr ,dfsieth any frmo htan a,cse hsting i eerv be, eiapphr vped,odele 'mi avhe i dna ,lfemys sedu ynma i been ni dngeearts to hwo otn.
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In oems ayws futr,ue opeulhf 'mi the rof. Stciismspie nad teh teh uonsxai apltne sa alos ehop woelh dna a of oubta. ?ighrt rgesfni sr,ocsde.
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To teeacn,pcca nsedign daer nad my ,oyu lov,e otndiaiavl bcka.

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