A letter from May 7th, 2020

Peaceful right?

Hi *****, I've been dealing with this for a while, and I just need to talk with somebody about it. I think that I may be Lesbian or Bi. I've felt this way for a long time, but I've just ignored it or told myself I'm 'confused'. My parents are homophobic, they were raised conservatively, and I don't want to talk to them about it. They don't know yet. The church at ****** is really open-minded, and I just need some help working through this. I don't want my parents to know (at least not yet), so sticking with e-mail would be good. Thank you for being there, ***** That's the letter we just sent to our pastor. If not now, when? Sure, it's Coronavirus. Sure, I'm quarantined in with my homophobic parents. Sure, I have absolutely nowhere to go and no resources to speak of. Sure, I'm currently sitting in a closet (really) crying. Sure, I'm mentally probably not ready for this. But, if not now, when? Wherever you are, good luck. And I love you. And so. does. God. -You a year ago

Epilogue

2 days later

Hi dearie,

Well, it's a been a year, that's for sure. A long, 15 months of March with life transformations packed in to the brim.

I suppose you'll...

Na dutepa nwta. . . I m,a cpecfiis to be aaspelxnu equre, edide,n. Took as smntoh htat l,wel nayorinnb uot 4 tghhuo ntoreah adn or ot eirgfu 5. Igev me iftsr ahve ofr nad eht enw itsngle nmae rpounsno acaltu wen nda ,sefhr a atth oe,n i eedrgn ,now eoairhpu tmei nncerumueebd a.
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Eth emumsr aws. . . Nda g,oln allf hte swa oto. Aemc trepsna to hwti to veil ,wertni and my nrtuer etim rof eht hetn adn. . . D'itdn i. To of htme hetn kewe a nipac tou ehtir ursh ciratfn ntntscao dne eacm ,ieefrl a tfle nda i clsla ormf mth,e on nad fo. And and lufaers edep eptxce dee,p dntnaedusnmrigis to em. Dndit' ,etreh fyimla i ,os tckus nrrteu hnmsot and twhi eliv sneiadt utansffogic oems despn ot ot ihrte y,cmnapo with undof rmseebm. Neeb 'sit ovyell adn.
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Sginth hcndgea sa uyo eahv aym vhae eetdepcx ,too retho steylrce. Airthnsci offsert hihcw naprste ynmraeo cnirishta my eolv ekpe part aapteepcir nm,id) of a dgos' a htrsade (ohghtu weest athw was ton my si ryuo orf 'im ni ot do i. Fdin taht )hyapp tllsi vaeh i pvdle,eode hewn nda been (vnee veha tno and c,sae m'i ohw sgthni than ynam uhrlhoygot mse,lfy wtha i eilhw to mfor reve shfetid, stegrenda ni and sued ,be eriahpp any i.
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For wysa uepolhf 'im hte ni tfer,uu mseo. Olweh fo xiunaos hoep stisicpiesm a olsa teh nad the sa btaou pntale and. Tig?rh o,redcss grfnesi.
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To ym ptaeecncac, rdea ,you ndeisgn dna aiitlvonda ovel, cabk.

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