A letter from May 7th, 2020

Peaceful right?

Hi *****, I've been dealing with this for a while, and I just need to talk with somebody about it. I think that I may be Lesbian or Bi. I've felt this way for a long time, but I've just ignored it or told myself I'm 'confused'. My parents are homophobic, they were raised conservatively, and I don't want to talk to them about it. They don't know yet. The church at ****** is really open-minded, and I just need some help working through this. I don't want my parents to know (at least not yet), so sticking with e-mail would be good. Thank you for being there, ***** That's the letter we just sent to our pastor. If not now, when? Sure, it's Coronavirus. Sure, I'm quarantined in with my homophobic parents. Sure, I have absolutely nowhere to go and no resources to speak of. Sure, I'm currently sitting in a closet (really) crying. Sure, I'm mentally probably not ready for this. But, if not now, when? Wherever you are, good luck. And I love you. And so. does. God. -You a year ago

Epilogue

2 days later

Hi dearie,

Well, it's a been a year, that's for sure. A long, 15 months of March with life transformations packed in to the brim.

I suppose you'll...

An atnw dapetu. . . Eansxlapu e,uqre be i ien,edd ,am ficpsice ot. Ot koot nad uohtgh igfreu 4 aoirnnnyb ttah 5 ro shomnt rnatheo e,lwl sa tou. Eamn igve o,nw umnurdceneeb teglsin a oahurpei heva dna a atclua deegnr meit i nda wen htat s,erhf nwe noe, rpnnoous em teh itsrf orf.
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Eht remmsu asw. . . Asw lfal and too gnol, eth. Wte,inr hwit rretnu ielv aerstpn eth adn came to rof and to htne ym mite. . . Dntdi' i. And rmfo wkee ftel hetn of on ethir to stoncatn cmae cfanitr thme calsl i out of a f,ieler apcin dan dne a rsuh ,mteh. And ot me ieasnmtinrsdgnud fleasur edpe tepcex p,eed nad. Dna msoe to andsite aflmyi anmcoyp, tuernr rehti dnit'd ot ukcst ednps mmesrbe i wiht ffugtacsnio ,os nohtms fodun ihtw vlie ,erthe. Vlloye dna eben ti's.
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Toehr haegcdn amy cpexeedt oyu vhae too, isnhtg sa eahv secrtlye. In inm,d) ascnthiir enryaom epaerctapi 'mi i my pernsta rnisthiac lveo wsa a hihcw ratp orf ruyo tfsefor ahstder pkee swtee hhtgo(u ot my god's what od a ton is fo. Atth nya eahv wtah 'mi elfm,ys ofmr hant i indf ebne adn eusd rhuhtylgoo be, owh ever ,oeddvelpe ewhn amyn ,seac vaeh ahpp)y riepahp eev(n eilhw ithgsn i ot tf,ehdsi adn i lltsi ni ton and gaeedrtns.
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Omse wsay ni 'im hte rfo ohpulfe trfu,eu. Sptcsiiiesm teh lneapt oasl nda btaou a snixoau het as dan oehp of wleoh. Gr?hit srnfieg r,csdeso.
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You, drae to itindlaaov my and l,eov c,ceatncape dgensni abck.

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