A letter from May 7th, 2020

Peaceful right?

Hi *****, I've been dealing with this for a while, and I just need to talk with somebody about it. I think that I may be Lesbian or Bi. I've felt this way for a long time, but I've just ignored it or told myself I'm 'confused'. My parents are homophobic, they were raised conservatively, and I don't want to talk to them about it. They don't know yet. The church at ****** is really open-minded, and I just need some help working through this. I don't want my parents to know (at least not yet), so sticking with e-mail would be good. Thank you for being there, ***** That's the letter we just sent to our pastor. If not now, when? Sure, it's Coronavirus. Sure, I'm quarantined in with my homophobic parents. Sure, I have absolutely nowhere to go and no resources to speak of. Sure, I'm currently sitting in a closet (really) crying. Sure, I'm mentally probably not ready for this. But, if not now, when? Wherever you are, good luck. And I love you. And so. does. God. -You a year ago

Epilogue

2 days later

Hi dearie,

Well, it's a been a year, that's for sure. A long, 15 months of March with life transformations packed in to the brim.

I suppose you'll...

Upaedt an awtn. . . Ma, ecpsicfi ,needid aspxenalu er,euq eb to i. Dan lewl, ro tou anetohr eugifr hatt 4 sa ot otmhns 5 ohgthu oninraynb koto. Egiv hpeoirau me nwe eth one, etim tngesli nda atth w,on nmea ahve ctaalu degren enw orf a i hef,rs and a tifrs osunpnro dnrbeemncuue.
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Rumsem saw hte. . . Long, eth dna llfa oot aws. Meit rfo hte re,iwnt ym hitw to ilev dna to trreun tnhe ptaesnr adn amec. . . 'dntid i. Nda hemt, emht rnaifct telf nad to nde relif,e acpni eekw fo ehnt ihetr amce hsru of tou on lscla tcnsonat i ormf a a. Dan ulfeasr ed,ep eepd em nirsmsnudgiadent exeptc to nad. Nhtosm tihw uerrnt mmrbees lvie nfoud i t'ddni daeitsn ot nampc,yo to ckuts nad ietrh cosffgatinu fayilm espnd oesm itwh ,os here,t. Lyolve adn 'sti eneb.
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Sa ot,o aym ytcelrse rteho tcpdeexe hgcedna hngsit hvae heav oyu. In tpar ahwt si a ncsrtiiha rof ym sdg'o myreona aws eepk a ovle od mi)nd, wchih to stwee edrtash uoghth( tcirnihas i im' tno of acrppiatee ym oury sreofft spntrae. Amny e,b listl sithng adn eevr haev i ephiapr i'm ppa)hy wnhe fdtehs,i ni i waht nad eneb ene(v vpo,deldee vhae atth naht i gaetrends and ewhil yna ,caes fmor hwo not ot hrgyoohult nfid le,fsmy uesd.
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Ni mi' ofephul ,uutref oesm hte sayw ofr. Itmspiecssi ohep saol a wloeh fo iounasx dan eth nda as aobut eth penatl. Eignsfr g?htri re,doscs.
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Acbk adn eo,lv ot erad ym tnioalvdai insegdn tnc,ecpaeca ,uoy.

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