A letter from May 7th, 2020

Peaceful right?

Hi *****, I've been dealing with this for a while, and I just need to talk with somebody about it. I think that I may be Lesbian or Bi. I've felt this way for a long time, but I've just ignored it or told myself I'm 'confused'. My parents are homophobic, they were raised conservatively, and I don't want to talk to them about it. They don't know yet. The church at ****** is really open-minded, and I just need some help working through this. I don't want my parents to know (at least not yet), so sticking with e-mail would be good. Thank you for being there, ***** That's the letter we just sent to our pastor. If not now, when? Sure, it's Coronavirus. Sure, I'm quarantined in with my homophobic parents. Sure, I have absolutely nowhere to go and no resources to speak of. Sure, I'm currently sitting in a closet (really) crying. Sure, I'm mentally probably not ready for this. But, if not now, when? Wherever you are, good luck. And I love you. And so. does. God. -You a year ago

Epilogue

2 days later

Hi dearie,

Well, it's a been a year, that's for sure. A long, 15 months of March with life transformations packed in to the brim.

I suppose you'll...

An wnta ptuade. . . I ,ienedd eb seciipcf snalpueax ot ,am urq,ee. Uto ro 4 to egiufr as tnaoerh ookt taht tmnhso adn hgtohu annniobyr l,elw 5. ,hrfse a dnrgee dan eht nad nunopros nwe taht me frsti amne ,eon vahe huopaier eigv tluaca orf ow,n umrduencbnee wen nsleigt i a etim.
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Asw mumres eht. . . Oot het ,olng wsa llfa dan. The nad eliv to ofr iwth my rnuret ot rtwi,ne dna hnet teim rspaetn meca. . . I nti'dd. Ecma eler,if i of a week a otu teirh of ned csttoann m,eht nda no ot mhet icfrant adn llsca tehn apinc hurs form tefl. Lrueasf to ,eepd dna dpee em cpexte rsnsiadtdgunenim dan. Myalfi thiw din'dt ocyp,nma taiedsn rrneut ihter oems to htosnm vlei onudf ot mmersbe sgncaoftufi s,o i tihw ckuts pdsen dna eh,ert. Adn veoyll eebn sit'.
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,oot gtshin sa chgedna vahe otreh seylecrt etedxepc mya ahve uyo. Sgod' sertadh atrp fo ofr maeroyn peripaacet ruoy a my ot my dni)m, frfeost a vloe ohg(thu awht do si irachnits srptnea m'i ekep sanithrci ni ont icwhh swa esewt i. I eenb vhea dsfi,eht ton avhe woh and hewn y)ahpp and tinhsg i ayn cs,ea waht anth ot uesd adn taht im' vnee( edsrgneat llist morf fsy,eml nfdi wlieh eb, urlhogtyho in lo,eedvdpe i ynam hppraie reve.
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'mi uftu,re upolfhe hte ni rfo osme yasw. Aosl eapnlt lhwoe itciepmsiss fo eth adn a and atoub eht sa hepo anixuso. Rtg?ih frgnies cse,osdr.
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Andiavltoi ym dan u,yo sgdnein to ,actnaepcce rdea evol, ckab.

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