A letter from May 7th, 2020

Peaceful right?

Hi *****, I've been dealing with this for a while, and I just need to talk with somebody about it. I think that I may be Lesbian or Bi. I've felt this way for a long time, but I've just ignored it or told myself I'm 'confused'. My parents are homophobic, they were raised conservatively, and I don't want to talk to them about it. They don't know yet. The church at ****** is really open-minded, and I just need some help working through this. I don't want my parents to know (at least not yet), so sticking with e-mail would be good. Thank you for being there, ***** That's the letter we just sent to our pastor. If not now, when? Sure, it's Coronavirus. Sure, I'm quarantined in with my homophobic parents. Sure, I have absolutely nowhere to go and no resources to speak of. Sure, I'm currently sitting in a closet (really) crying. Sure, I'm mentally probably not ready for this. But, if not now, when? Wherever you are, good luck. And I love you. And so. does. God. -You a year ago

Epilogue

2 days later

Hi dearie,

Well, it's a been a year, that's for sure. A long, 15 months of March with life transformations packed in to the brim.

I suppose you'll...

An twan ptduae. . . M,a fsciipec to be i uqer,e eplanausx ,dneied. As 5 tuo le,wl oheatnr 4 to ahtt ghutoh ookt nroinynba ro tnmhso nda eiurgf. Vhea dan ,neo a eumenrenudbc acltua a gnrdee rof ltgines no,w em the ewn i adn thta neam ipheaour ,hsfer rnposuno wne give emit irsft.
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Swa esmrmu the. . . Allf ,ongl aws too dna het. My ot eimt lvei eht srptnae for nad hiwt tenrru and ,niretw ot emac tneh. . . T'didn i. Heirt tneh and srhu a dne fo out ntcsaont nad mcae on a mhte pnaic ot frmo ifancrt i of kewe ,ifreel tfle casll ht,em. Tcepex dan rasflue to me mdiiduenrgasntns ,peed adn eped. Densp tihw seom kutsc i foudn nad treurn to id'tnd eliv stonmh ,amnopcy saniedt os, ilamyf ot rth,ee eihrt hitw eemmrsb untficsafog. 'tsi dna voeyll nebe.
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To,o yma uyo veha eecpxetd vaeh sginth ycelsrte nadchge oerth sa. Tno is in ym a fro atwh ot keep a nim,d) i'm osg'd oelv i arpt chhiw (uhhgot my ernptas draseth do ewset prcetpaeai wsa of anhtcisri astinhicr emranoy frstefo uryo. Ot (neve gitsnh i litls m,yslfe athn dna ehav thaw nad hrapipe esud dan e,sac ph)ypa eneb ont aveh elvdeep,do nya b,e hwo i gtnasrdee i whne hhyoltorgu tath ni mi' amny veer mfro h,eidstf ifdn eiwlh.
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Ofr ni osem eth uretuf, yaws eoufplh mi'. Nad eth adn osaunix tesisipmsic btauo ntpale elwho eth sa a of epoh lsoa. Nersfgi sc,deros ?tirhg.
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Ot nsdegin aactcncpe,e dare dan o,vel odilaantiv akbc o,uy ym.

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