A letter from May 7th, 2020

Peaceful right?

Hi *****, I've been dealing with this for a while, and I just need to talk with somebody about it. I think that I may be Lesbian or Bi. I've felt this way for a long time, but I've just ignored it or told myself I'm 'confused'. My parents are homophobic, they were raised conservatively, and I don't want to talk to them about it. They don't know yet. The church at ****** is really open-minded, and I just need some help working through this. I don't want my parents to know (at least not yet), so sticking with e-mail would be good. Thank you for being there, ***** That's the letter we just sent to our pastor. If not now, when? Sure, it's Coronavirus. Sure, I'm quarantined in with my homophobic parents. Sure, I have absolutely nowhere to go and no resources to speak of. Sure, I'm currently sitting in a closet (really) crying. Sure, I'm mentally probably not ready for this. But, if not now, when? Wherever you are, good luck. And I love you. And so. does. God. -You a year ago

Epilogue

2 days later

Hi dearie,

Well, it's a been a year, that's for sure. A long, 15 months of March with life transformations packed in to the brim.

I suppose you'll...

Eatpud tanw an. . . M,a nee,idd usaxnplea be eeruq, ot i cpeicsif. To uto smhont 5 thta sa onrheta uhogth nraiboynn well, nad 4 fugrie otko or. Veah wen iftsr eth rh,esf caluat i etim glnitse dna me a nrspunoo gvie dna rfo rhoapeui munrucbeeden a wne noe, enma egdenr n,ow tath.
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Rusmme aws het. . . Oto het and aws lo,ng afll. Eimt to n,wrtie evil hte dna dna tnrreu ym rfo twhi ot arpsetn nhet eacm. . . I ndtid'. Eftl emth cosanttn nteh irlfee, ot a nacpi fo fo i adn ewek mhte, husr dne fomr adn otu llcas on a erthi cfnriat ecam. Cteepx and adn peed, depe asflreu tgnnnsisarudmdei to em. Oems ot dna sitofugfcan i lmiyaf pndse veli so, ndt'id erutrn e,ther mresbme trhei nyp,mcoa wthi aniedst hitw mothns to stcuk donfu. 'sit vlyeol eenb dan.
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Ghcande ouy t,oo yam eavh esertylc have thore nstihg sa xtpeedce. Go'sd aerymno to fo levo ym enatrsp 'im )dm,in i ehtards for fforste ym is eepk aws isirtchna a rtpa what h(ohutg setwe ryou a shicitrna ton cwihh eatcpepira in do. Reve hliew dgretnase lilst en(ve dfin nbee i ni ,tifedhs nay aecs, otlhhruoyg anht from im' adn l,dovpdeee vhae that fyml,se nda ,be nstgih nhwe whta veah adn i hwo phap)y sedu i myna iappher otn ot.
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Rtufeu, ni wasy teh olufhep orf 'im esom. Eth naoixus dan teh a heowl heop tsecisipism nad tbuao talpne saol fo sa. ?itghr c,odsers finresg.
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Nda ot dlvaoniait ,vleo bkac innsged my caccee,atpn o,yu dera.

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