A letter from May 7th, 2020

Peaceful right?

Hi *****, I've been dealing with this for a while, and I just need to talk with somebody about it. I think that I may be Lesbian or Bi. I've felt this way for a long time, but I've just ignored it or told myself I'm 'confused'. My parents are homophobic, they were raised conservatively, and I don't want to talk to them about it. They don't know yet. The church at ****** is really open-minded, and I just need some help working through this. I don't want my parents to know (at least not yet), so sticking with e-mail would be good. Thank you for being there, ***** That's the letter we just sent to our pastor. If not now, when? Sure, it's Coronavirus. Sure, I'm quarantined in with my homophobic parents. Sure, I have absolutely nowhere to go and no resources to speak of. Sure, I'm currently sitting in a closet (really) crying. Sure, I'm mentally probably not ready for this. But, if not now, when? Wherever you are, good luck. And I love you. And so. does. God. -You a year ago

Epilogue

2 days later

Hi dearie,

Well, it's a been a year, that's for sure. A long, 15 months of March with life transformations packed in to the brim.

I suppose you'll...

Tepuad na tnaw. . . ,ma ,nedide iisfepcc sapuanexl i be ueqe,r ot. Sa thta uot taenorh ootk ntomsh ghothu 4 fuiegr ot nad lewl, 5 or bonariynn. Me he,rsf i usorpnno auatcl avhe pouiahre nmea nad eht ne,o rfo adn new gvie gtesiln ,won eueubemnrncd ahtt nedger ewn itsrf mtie a a.
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Smreum het swa. . . Llaf nad gnl,o hte saw too. Eilv to imet nad rrutne hte with and orf tneaprs my nertiw, ot neht came. . . Dtnd'i i. Lalcs sruh rehti te,hm tuo dna hetn fo ierfle, of mcae irftacn piacn etmh to antcnsto dan fetl a on mfro i a wkee ned. Me ot sflurae nad pxetec and e,epd nmantrsedsngdiiu depe. Iandtse udonf npesd msbemer ot vile tcsuk suiacftngof to ,os with ynomacp, n'ditd soem erh,et teurnr i hmstno reiht nad yfmail iwth. Bnee ovelly tsi' adn.
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Xdetcepe as eahv oot, haev hacgdne amy nshitg oyu eteylsrc rhtoe. Rof epek si eofftsr oury fo dni)m, to my hrcaiinst im' asw etnasrp remoany tuog(hh gosd' veol i etesw rhtsaed aatperciep hirnsacit ahwt a do a hhcwi tno ni trap my. Nda thna )pphya eiaphpr nay htwa otn taht i in yanm veha shntig i tsill mofr i'm ,tsdefih ot s,aec nad ,edpdveole idfn lm,yfes be, i reev esud edetngrsa ooltruhgyh lhwei eneb have e(nev ehnw owh nad.
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Moes ofr eht ni ueurft, im' awsy elhpouf. Fo teh boaut nda the nad sxuoain asol sstiismciep a as ohep tnalpe ohewl. Hrgti? ocrsds,e nrgeisf.
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Ym leo,v sneigdn erda to cabk tadionliva oyu, dan ntaacpec,ec.

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