A letter from May 4th, 2020

Dear Future Abby, This is Gabby Lovell, your old friend from Virge. :) I think we'll still be talking at this time, I hope we are. Can you believe it's been 5 years since I wrote this letter? Gosh, I can't believe it. I haven't even lived it yet (only 16 haha) but I can't believe we'll actually be reading these one day. Crazy right? Anyways, I don't know what to say, but I know there's a lot I want to say even though I don't know it yet. First, I want to ask, how are you? Did you make it to Law School? Have you found a boyfriend (or even husband?) What's life like wherever you are? Do you miss me? Because I'm pretty sure I already miss you even though we're probs still friends haha Second, here's a flashback to one of our talks (it was 9:30 btw, not 6, my computer time is 3 hours off.) I found this one really special so I saved it. I have a feeling we'll both be cringing as our fancy college minds read our very teenager typing haha "aBBy 6:24 PM aweee, gabs. im legit gonna cry when you say your leaving 6:25 bc even though im all caught up in this, VIRGE will NEVER i mean NEVER be the same w/o you 6:25 like you make or break this club i cant even imagine it w/o you 6:25 i dont wanna rush u, if you wanna wait just lmk Gabby Lovell 6:27 PM Awww abs dang it now im gonna cry bc gosh this is like a whole era of my life ending and im afraid once i go all of these ppl im close w is gonna go too and its terrifying bc once i leave its like, i cant go back w/o looking like an idiot and im freaking terrified im making a mistake you know? <3 6:27 thank you girlie aBBy 6:27 PM watch it all just fall way downhill after you leave :joy: you are literally the glue gab Gabby Lovell 6:28 PM ikkkk like.... i just cant stay, like sometimes you know but u have doubts but u know that you gotta do something and i gotta do this, as long as my guidance counselor doesn't say i need extra curriculums still... then... welp im stuck XD but, i think im leaving and its gonna break my heart is a million pieces but... like i need to 6:28 <3 AWWW DANG IT ABBY IMMA RLY CRY 6:29 that means so much and im so happy i made the club, like i would've never thought aBBy 6:30 PM awe, don’t cry. bigger and better things are ahead of you, it has to end sometime and the way i see it, i think you should live out your last senior year to the fullest <3 you won’t regret it. dont tie yourself to the computer because you deserve so much more. dont be afraid of whats out there for you, i know this club means a lot but we will ALWAYS be your friends, and you will never grow distance from us because of this slack. look at sara! she left and we’re still friends with her <3 you need to leave for you, for your health and freedom. trust me, you wont regret it 6:30 i knowww, let me do all the cryng for you 6:30 go live, be a teenager 6:30 you legit make this club 6:31 but dont worry about it! its just a club with a bunch of files, its the people that make it special and most of them left, and the ones still around are still here. you wont lose us and you especially wont lose me, thats a promise Gabby Lovell 6:31 PM Im saving that bc that means the world and i can never say how much it means but tysm <3 im literally crying just tysm, that means everything 6:32 Thank you, like really abs, Ill always be your friend too, i promise, and it means so much well always be close aBBy 6:33 PM aweeee. you mean the world to us <3 and thats not gonna change, regardless of a silly club. 6:34 thank youuuuu, i hope we will always stay this close. we’ve been friends for a long time now, and i dont think much will change 6:34 especially since everything is online anyways 6:35 it really does <3 and if im being honest idt i would have made it through that year where i had no friends, no life, no sport, and was in depression without you. when i met you it was like a miracle and you pulled me out of a hard time, i can never appreciate you more gabs <3 Gabby Lovell 6:37 PM <3 idek what to say, that means so much abby and i had no clue i helped you so much, thank you so so much and im so happy i could be there for you, literally the same, like you have no clue how much youve done for me and how happy i get everytime we talk, ive literally found my true best friend and its so amazing 6:37 Well always be best friends and i never knew good, real ppl existed until i met you and i just, youll never know how much i care about and love you girlie, you've always been there for me and have been honest with me and i cant thank you enough for everything 6:38 literally, thank you, for everything aBBy 6:40 PM same and just talking to someone and being such good friends was enough, i feel the exact same way and im so glad we found each other aweee, same. my mom always told me friends would come and go, because they would move away and you’d lose touch, but i honestly consider you more of family at this point because we have legit never really met in person and we’re still this close. thats what i call something special. im so glad, thank you Gabby Lovell 6:43 PM <3 me too girlie awwwwww, i know, everybody says after HS, you wont have past friends but i think our friendship is true enough that it will probs get stronger after that <3 and same abby, you literally are like a sister to me and its so special aBBy 6:43 PM i agree! it’ll be crazy when we’re both in college or w.e and we’ll be dming each other from other parts of the country 6:43 same here 6:44 maybe finally, sOMEDAY we’ll get to meet in person 6:44 i swear this kind of relationship is crazy cuz we have never actually met 6:44 its like one that you’d find in the news lol Gabby Lovell 6:44 PM <3 honestly, how cool will that be? and planning meet up times where we talk about all of our crazy college stories and stuff and then be bridesmaids at each others weddings, how awesome is that gonna be? 6:45 I KNOW like my parents are all worried im friendless rn bc of no dance and i just keep thinking i never had much of a friendship w the girls there, like i have real friends and a real best friend online and our bond is way deeper than any of theirs 6:45 literally, our story could legit be a book one day 6:45 i cant wait for us to meet when we get older 6:46 like go out shopping or to the beach or smth aBBy 6:46 PM I KNOWWW, im just thinking about this now. its gonna be so crazy, like insannneee, you can def count on a bridesmaid girly :joy: its gonna be cray cray 6:46 :joy: 6:46 same though ________________________________________ New 6:46 i talk to you about stuff that i have NEVER told anyone 6:46 like legit no one 6:47 ack my mom 6:47 shes coming for me 6:47 i hear the footsteps" How most of our convos ended, one of our moms running to unplug the wifi hahaha. I loved that conversation soooo much. I just loved it though because it was so real and special to me. Like it really showed how close we are and how much we bonded and like we met for two seconds at club awards but otherwise, we never really met and we're this close? How special and amazing is that <3 So I saved this, because it shows how good of a friend you are and how supportive and kind you've always been to me. It also shows how our late night talks go and how special they used to be (hopefully they still are <3) Third, jeez Abs I guess I can start by saying what an amazing friend you are. Like, I read our conversation last night (you were supporting me when I decided to not rejoin Virge but had doubts) and you actually made me cry. Everybody has different expectations of me and what I should do but whatever I do and whatever idiotic things I've done, I always can lean on you and get advice and support. You've always been there for me through everything, and I don't know how I can ever thank you enough for it. Thank you doesn't seem like a strong enough expression for what I want to say to you. You changed my life Abby. Literally changed my life. I never had a friend like you, ever. Nobody I could lean on and pour my heart out to. Nobody to be there when I'm broken or cover me when I'm sick or help me fix problems I can't fix on my own. You're my best friend, and our friendship means everything to me right now, (and I think when we read these letters, it will then too.) I remember so many nights we'd stay up way later than usual telling each other about our lives. Going on and on about how things with boys are/have been and how we can't wait to grow up and move out and see th world. How one day we'll meet in person and go and do something fun. How the sicknesses and problems we face will heal with time (remember when I went through that year of angioedema and my skin kept randomly swelling? It was terrifying and I broke down constaly over that, but you were always there to help me through it and you gave me hope I didn't have.) I remember nights we'd just stayed up late talking about absolutely nothing or sharing life tips or crying to each other about losing a friend or idiot boys or how much of a pain the Virge sponsors are (I hope you survived that and I'm sorry again for leaving you. I hope future me was selfless enough to help you and stay by your side even though I didn't stay in the club.) But really Abby, I look back and I just smile because of all these memories we shared together. You gave me the life I never had, a life with a best friend. You were there for me through literally everything and I don't know what I would have done without you. You changed me in the best of ways, you gave me freedom to be myself, and because of you, I've found myself. I have a future ahead of me. I have a career I'm reaching towards. I could have never of done anything that I did without you. Gosh, I would've probably died from an anxiety attack or something without you there those late nights to tell me it's okay. You have no clue what you've done for me and how many days I went from tears to smiling because of the way you supported me. I know I'm rambling, and you're probably busy studying law or having fun with college friends to read this but I wanted you to know. I wanted you to know that even if we don't stay close (I think we will) that you changed my life, Abby. You made me a better me. You've never let me down and I love you more than words can describe. You're my best friend and I will always always always care about you. You have no clue everything you've done and I really wish you the best Abby, I really do. When you told me about your dreams, I could see it. I knew deep down you were becoming something amazing in life. You're awesome, you're sooooo smart, and your heart has always been in the right places. You're a great person, you're so kind and your heart is pure gold. You'll never know how much I care about you and I hope the way we talk now never ends. I hope we can meet irl and do fun things and call/slack for hours on end in the future. I hope we can be bridesmaids at each others weddings and go to one anothers baby showers and as we grow up, we never lose this love and awesomeness we had as teens. Just saying, we're pretty cool right now haha. Literally, you have the best fashion sense out of everyone I know. Seriously. Another thing I wanted to tell you is dang girl, you're beautiful. If for some reason a man is idiotic enough to leave you and break your heart, forget about him. I hope I can be there to dry your tears but if not, don't forget about how strong and brave and beautiful and amazing you are. There are millions of guys out there who will love you and treat you well, don't let one jerk steal those opportunities away. Any man would be so happy to have you and if he left you, he's the biggest idiot in the world and he has no heart to leave you like that. Wait for the right guy, he's out there for you Abby. If you found him already, yay!!! I'm so happy for you and I hope he treats you well girlie. You deserve the most amazing person and I hope he's the one. I hope he does all of the stuff you've wanted and you can start a beautiful life together <3 You deserve that and so much more. Never lose hope Abby and always find time to breathe. When you get this, you're probably going to be about 20 and it seems like a stressful time, so just breathe and live life okay? Be young while you can, do something reasonably crazy (ya know, nothing too crazy haha, you're smart enough to know that tho), go to the beach, have fun with friends, live life okay? You can work and have fun. Please do that reasonably okay? Don't overwork yourself. Don't overdo your body. Don't stress or feel anxious. It will all work out in the end girlie, I promise. And if you're going through a hard time, have hope that it will get better because I promise it will. Look at how much you've been through and you've gotten through it. Don't let one hard time stop you, you have such a beautiful future ahead of you and whatever difficulty you face, you can overcome like you have before. Life doesn't stay hard forever and whatever you're going through it changes. Life changes, and it'll all work out for the best. Keep holding on and never let go of happiness Abs. It'll be okay, I promise. Never hesitate to reach out to me, even if we aren't close anymore at this time. I love you girlie and even if we drift apart, I will always be there for you. Also, flipping through my files, I was trying to find like another convo or something we shared, but I actually found this poem. We were talking late one night and I can't remember what happened, but I had a really hard time with something and you helped me through it <3 and then I remember we started talking about boys and we stayed up until like midnight talking and it was amazing, and during our convo I wrote this poem (this is probably really cheesy reading as a mature 20 yo haha) but I always found I special because it took me back to those memories "You’re a best friend, you’re a true friend You’re the type to last until the very end You help me breathe during anxiety attacks And I love our late nights with caps in Slack Telling me I’m actually worth something Even when I feel like I’m really nothing Laughing out loud and getting in messes Video chatting and picking out dresses Encouraging you to talk to the boy you like You telling me I’ll find the right one with time Dealing with drama and staying up all night Crying with me and saying it’ll be alright I’ll never leave you and you’ll never leave me You give me the hope and faith I need to breathe I don’t know how I’d make it through life Without my best friend right by my side. (To my best friend, Abigail Muller, thanks for everything <3)" Well, I hope you're doing well Abs and I really hope we're still in touch and super close. I love you soooooo much and I hope your future looks amazing. I hope all is well and that life just keeps getting better for you <3 I'll never forget you Abs and I can't wait to see what you become. Here's to surviving chat feuds, virge sponsors, sucky boys, sibling problems, health issues, anxiety, dark times, school, corona virus, major hurricanes, and everything else we've made it through together. We somehow survived it all girlie, we can get through whatever else lies ahead! Thanks for being with me every step of the way, I hope we can keep walking together as the years go by. <3 Thank you for everything! Stay safe and be strong, it'll all be okay <3 I love ya girlie <3 -Gabby Lovell (Just in case you lost these or smth, 239-203-4206 and gablovell@yahoo.com or gabbylovell63@gmail.com)