hey

Today I received a letter from the past asking a question: did he love me? and the answer is "yes, but you didn't" weird how what I was giving for granted was my love, and that was exactly what was missing when the moment came. I like receiving this letter even though I feel kind of frustrated of not being able to reply them, as if I was really two different entities. I want to tell you how I feel today but I guess it's not all that clear to me, I'm at work, bagsfly and stuff, you still work there? hope not, I mean, it's not bad but you're meant for more, actually that's one of my problems, I don't know what to do to feel like I'm doing something for you, futureself. I might sent my curriculum today to some place, but I don't think I'm gonna change work, I mean, it's difficult that someone will pay me more, but I don't know, I want to do so much more, but when I have the time, I don't feel like doing anything. You know how this is, it happens to you a lot, today I should do some of those to-do lists. Other thing that was been on your mind lately is love, or the lack of, the thing is you have realized that you being lonely is your fault, for thinking people are not enough, and though you know that, you are not willing to change this. You think that you'll find your love when you live in Europe, you are such a dreamer