A letter from March 24th, 2020

Peaceful right?

Dear Future Me, i hope you're in your dream college today and everything is not in quarantine. Also hope you're able to read randomly thousands of books, watching endlessly tv-series and hear your parents how much they can't wait you to come back home to İzmir for holidays. I just checked the part i wrote now and i realize how formal it is smh.(göz deviren emoji burası) Whatever, everything is not so perfect right now, i am hoping to study more hard the rest of my last 3 months to THE exam in quarantine, make better results on denemeler and going to win an excellent university ve allah rızası için şaşırtmak my teachers be. Valla geri kalan zamanım için 12. sınıfım çöp olmuşa benziyor, mezuniyetimi bile görmeden ve balo elbisemi giymek için zayıflamadan koronadan ölebilirim ya da en kötüsü zayıflayınca bunların hiçbirini yapamayabiliriz. ALLAM LÜTFEN 2020'de EXCELLENT ÜNİVERSİTE YARABBİ. Nys. -öhöm- For now that's all i can say and i really really hope you're feeling soo beautiful and actually are, comfortable with yourself cause you showed your real potential abilities actually to yourself and so happy (cause i need to be right now), that you forget your 19th birthday because YOU ARE SO **** HAPPY TO REMEMBER. I hope i laugh at the situation i am in right now in your day, show this e-letter to my new friends or recent ones to make them laugh and be even more happy. Also, maybe you're in contact with Beyza, Rabia, İclal, Yaren and Gökçen. Maybe you're not. Maybe you met Asude again. Maybe you lost one of them. It doesn't matter, try contact and thank the rest please. Even if they don't know it well, they made your life better in so many ways you know. If you don't, know it. Because your life wasn't so easy (maybe because of your thoughts or the situations you're in) and won't be easy at 18 if you're alone. Make 19 better for yourself. Eat sushi, secretly hate it. Drink as much as you can. PLS CHANGE UR STYLE. Learn a new language. Improve yourself. Try everything you want. Don't dissapoint your 8-year-old-self like i did. Please love yourself. Don't push to crush even if things go wrong. Kendine de iyi bak, soğuktur oralar. PUT SOME CLOTHES ON LİKE YOU SAY. Burası pek soğuk olmaz, alışmışsındır. But make a snow angel for me and the 6 years you couldn't. Smell this message, i am sooo sure it'll be smell like cologne from my quarantine days. HAPPY BİRTHDAY. SANA LOTS OF DEZENFEKTAN YOLLUYORUM, METRO TUTAMAÇLARINI TUTTUKTAN SONRA KULLANIRSIN. Değerimi bil. byü.

Epilogue

almost 4 years later

Dear past me,

Somehow, in 2021, I didn't reply to this letter. I think it was waiting for me to answer it today.
The horrendous days of quarantine ended in...

Cna rlaex 20,21 uoy.
Asnterp cytaulla ew yera ecaesbu cgelo,le ot tiṡbnual vlie zri̇im teh vmoed our t'ndo ni esdttar eamnoyr, i. .
Kntkie ot yuo hsee'r teh in got h,tgni oo,os zıdlyı. Ghistn to neve in eimngia uyo it het swa pehapn tbu ton oudlw. . . . Nlueaggas trhee dgstyniu in rueyo'. Uoy nwok dan cnrfhe uyo eenradl ?waht.
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Lodu'nct ryou 'yuoer sthi on oyu utb iwht form ni ecnrfa ads ryuo a ot oprm oomr go het mord ot ongig etriw smlie cafe.
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Yan qtrenfeu as nto het vaobe attncoc with eansm ni ikhnt fo as u'oery you. Eon tsol of mthe ouy eevn. Rhigt taht :) esdsgue.
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Oyu m,drarei go otg yaner to arnfce 'ldtounc gwddnei het in reew you cbs.
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Aci̇ll paelc oecsl uin ifne, to a is sha she. Meso wot esam yuo ttah uoy steb tgo het gssue sethro yad ouy lo'tudw iun het nrfdie eht eb cahe tnio teher t'ulcdno emht but of ihwt of.
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Göençk is oogd. Hseuo she ednrte a ni uğmla. Diuesst seh tktuu heert hwti. Tub oyr,rs yuo 'dindt mtee ety imh. Osem ayd utb eocls.
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Żmrii uistesd riaab ni. Btu eoy'ur to yuo zṙmii ese uyo otcactn in erfat eealv tgo niaag loudcnt' ehr.
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Lwil yad see eon ulactayl oyu saeud. A imdn oryu etb lowb fcat lwil i gineb sthi. Ese i'tddn eesht oimngc uoy wonk i.
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Oyu i weer owkn it nda idsa nibsulṫa tbaou be uoy ldco ialgnkt igmht ewnh. 'tddnti taht sida ne,am uoy reeh nda ivbleee us i aedl eacpl nay sylalfipccei btu. An eht ot tihw zeor fnaecr atwehre hnnroter unred gnizefre. Aseubec os nfaecr in ?ft?w?? be lodc ni humc recni it's ot and.
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Nehppa ersltugsg. Sayer eth 5 yeth ni tlas phpneaed. Sobdwrnkae yamn anmy ithw btu okerwd myna too dahr, uyo frletdi peploe adh. Of yuo trheie tpriesa solt ot nda otsl edcir ubt ouy wtne. Dema so cnd'tluo otenarh fo thwi sad oyu you fdernsi tou of yuo noe ebd tgo ot mseeomts,i ubt uory eppeol salo bset nuoycrt evomd. Nwok erh uyo konw tye neve tawh aiagn? oyu dna ntod'. In s,aremd ont htsi oury tig?rh eenv in is.
Do'tn kwon sceaebu throw iutrtso ubato a ouy i to tnheoar giong 'tond onyruct veen yuo ihtnk ti as. .
Ti ouy rhotw the ,si hntig. Lyl'ou veen velo oyu rowyr ruylsfoe tn,hik nath ndot' orme. .
You d'ttdin ilek paidssiotn yuo dbelieev -el8aylsed-ro-f yoru. .
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Dehta sh,siu uoy gusse rteid i oyu vrye yu,illcbp ti. Ahtt you etnw near esucaeb sisuh to hops aetfr eht mcosdadnl' eth. .
Cteolsh eglna raetf amek seom tup acn ikthc as rela a o,uy oosn on fro as i 'lli snwo i. Oirulnayvtl uaeebcs reeh nca nodt' htwi snice it oals me bguotrh i lles >:( it teh i ncoego,l rhee llist yeth ellms.
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And 91 l,ltays aws odog. Adem deirfsn enw 91 uyo 8 ta. Uoy elki on esel oot idd eno ythe edlehp. Lecos 23 si onw, 22 ye'ruo. Erou'y ngakmi to sltil pmeorvi luelssce wen yuolerfs litls try tuoba life yoe'ur dan senirdf,. 'yollu uevoy' ostm ese reev cuhm but tel,f tthsa' splaiuleb nigth yver eht.

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