A letter from January 17th, 2020

Dear FutureMe, january 17th, 2020 , you were 15 years old , couple of months till 16! been a ride , but a bad one. I am , (and you were ), remembering things from long forgotten, memories small , but i think they were important. But mostly lots of wrong,bad, regretful decision. I am now studying for my math exam , i am now living a life i don’t want , but i have hope. I am trying to forgive my past self , for not being thoughtful and being idiotic, missing all the opportunities. Right now i am hoping in you , to be better , 5 years ain’t that much. Right now i am not happy, i am mostly sad , my hygiene is bad , selfcare non existant , self love vanished , some people , have no hobbies or talent (can’t eveb ride a bike lmao) but a lot of intrests , but nothing to feel proud of. Family is financially bad , i am not going out a lot ,and i am addicted to my phone , not social medias i am not popular , but other things. i am not happy , and i don’t wanna feel that i never will And i am putting my hope in you , i hope you have went and made progress and achievements, you are healthier , go to the gym , took martial arts classes , and became good at guitar , and drawing (the only thing i speculate i have some kind of talent at), go out more , less phones , more dreamy than ever, and made a couple of friends , good ones, maybe some girls ;). And most importantly, love yourself , i feel like i am **** right now , and uglier than ever, with that hair and that face, i hope you got over it , and care about you. And please, stay away from the bad **** , stay away from the bad people, don’t start a fight but end one ,have confidence even if you got hit.i have faith in you, faith is what keeps me going I am hoping , i don’t want to fail See you on your 20th bday Riding a bike