A letter from June 21st, 2018

Time Travelled — almost 3 years

Peaceful right?

Dear FutureMe, So, right now, I'm sitting in Josh and I's shared bedroom in his mom's house. I just finished my first reflection journal for the first 50 hours of my practicum at SVC. I concluded this reflection by saying that I don't want to work in campus life. So, I guess that's something. I'm broke as fuck, in so much debt I could cry, and I'm not in the best physical shape. But I also have a family I love, a wonderful man by my side, and friends that mean the world to me. So, life's not bad. Sometimes I think back to when I was like 13 or 14-- did I envision my life as it is now? I'm so fucking proud of myself for the things I've overcome-- I have a college degree, I'm halfway through grad school, and i finally have a reliable mode of transport. I think little teenage me would be pretty amazed at where I am now. So, who knows where I'll be in 3 years? Will I be close to an assistant director of residence life position? Will i even pursue residence life as my first job? There's still so much uncertainty in my life, but I'm not scared of it. So, in three years from now, I'll basically be old. Just kidding. But I'll be closer to thirty. Which is when I said I'd want kids. How will I feel in three years? Will I have a better idea of whether or not I actually want to have children? I think I chose thirty because by that time I should know what the hell I want in life, right? I'll be more stable financially I hope, and I'll be ready to decide if I want to have a child. Who knows. I'm only 22 right now, not yet 23. On another note, I realllllly don't care about any more of my birthdays. Maybe 25 because car insurance or whatever. I guess I'm a little scared of aging-- It means losing touch with youth, getting more wrinkles, and physical deterioration. But even when I get this letter I'll still be in my twenties so maybe I should stop being so morbid. Okay, I'm seriously getting annoyed by myself, so I'll wrap this letter up. I guess this will be a neat little surprise in my inbox three years from now. Maybe I can do this again after I receive this one. PS thanks Pantsuit Politics for telling me about this. Hopefully your podcast is still going strong in 3 years. Or, ideally, Beth and Sarah will be running the country in some capacity. FUCK Donald Trump. okaythanksbyeeeee

Epilogue

about 1 year later

It's kind of a weird feeling to read this as a 26-almost-27-year old. I've been through so many changes in almost five years that I view my 22-year old self...

Vefi as + od sgsue lwli glloab you own! i ïvean ot that a so reyas depmainc. .
.
Opel:isr i hhgi hsoj loscoh elorgn twih rtsetawehe am ym on. Aery alyflin nde ym rou for i to tbho fo ed-am- i oducl of su in eaugdrta deden hwchi niegb ehav dnsiieoc pu einrloithpsa ebst tals hte eicdded lo,hcos. Htreo adn hrtig cldnebiyir ew nwreet' eewr uayppnh ofr sjtu we goethtre ceah. In ubt lelw sarye oenpsk hse' i nogid imh three to te'avhn now i poeh. .
.
Dna aws i prta swa nwhe ;eindfr ii: enomseo rbfeeo to etm prleios m'i ta airderm sbte an i ym ltulyaac aargenm won rnteni a rmaltwa eh rseay. We was nda ngith ascsilc wmtaa"l?r ginatd i mhi on _"__ a ncdtoerenec mfor pap itfrs smgadsee the. Oswv edden ahtt a ehrpas nwdgied ni laos my up. .
.
)!!!( 3 ym uto ot sftir shlooc of of fhniis arey butao i ergudata ojb ma. Ot isltl ayp taht oessrpc is eaisr tfac cdecatpe a atht m'i iinoptos i eht ynelectr inrytg ahrntoe nintagcifsi. .
.
Ephaipnng i not up ahtt odnesosg ta fatc wodul ecdsienre htta eif;l hte khtan ni i up thuohgt hhaa den ddi den. .
.
He,ya i'm oh mite noso tesre'h in on sidk ngiavh hlel yan awy. Fi a nda i do sthi ,hldci dnoe ocmyon?e! in one eavh it's. .
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Aubot sihtadrby tabou swa atps i ym sla,o 'ondt :night itghr me noe reca neyomra. Ot dlo ma ikhtn how ahev i tobau het mtie flha i. .
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Eathnor em ni,gga ot btu rwroy gnriyt is me sah ratp hsit ti slilt mecrbae of outba atpr of. Eiercexnep i gae ervey fgratlue nad yda ma iwth diwmso ifel emsoc ofr ichwh. I htat ecnito i streho wonma a gelsdtgru em fo reca esls ma iwhhc htaw whti ureygno semmileny thkni tstrngia outab ot sa i. At iehtcang oerm vtsnee i em eth ot era ecnrte go lwil begin if olosne" tb;i uyo tatpnie and etl kusc slitl ilttle anieptt eb utb sg"rnei a eifl to. .
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Htat hlemtesesv i nad trspa roesht ared ese cna fo in hits oeph hits. Voemrpdi sah a l-de2ayr2-o ysltav togwhr in rweto ufliifcdt but tsymlo leif aghcesn sifrt ettrle feiv ym i mties icesn eosm rewe mtosla imnmsee ;ysear xendeepceri as dan 'ive ym. Tuo to lwduo ohtes ylpa sti' dan of adn anwdet my nneo lfei it slotma uot cpternosdii owh nfyun i uhhotgt amce treu one alpn wya !w)eh(w. .

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