A letter from June 21st, 2018

Time Travelled — almost 3 years

Peaceful right?

Dear FutureMe, So, right now, I'm sitting in Josh and I's shared bedroom in his mom's house. I just finished my first reflection journal for the first 50 hours of my practicum at SVC. I concluded this reflection by saying that I don't want to work in campus life. So, I guess that's something. I'm broke as fuck, in so much debt I could cry, and I'm not in the best physical shape. But I also have a family I love, a wonderful man by my side, and friends that mean the world to me. So, life's not bad. Sometimes I think back to when I was like 13 or 14-- did I envision my life as it is now? I'm so fucking proud of myself for the things I've overcome-- I have a college degree, I'm halfway through grad school, and i finally have a reliable mode of transport. I think little teenage me would be pretty amazed at where I am now. So, who knows where I'll be in 3 years? Will I be close to an assistant director of residence life position? Will i even pursue residence life as my first job? There's still so much uncertainty in my life, but I'm not scared of it. So, in three years from now, I'll basically be old. Just kidding. But I'll be closer to thirty. Which is when I said I'd want kids. How will I feel in three years? Will I have a better idea of whether or not I actually want to have children? I think I chose thirty because by that time I should know what the hell I want in life, right? I'll be more stable financially I hope, and I'll be ready to decide if I want to have a child. Who knows. I'm only 22 right now, not yet 23. On another note, I realllllly don't care about any more of my birthdays. Maybe 25 because car insurance or whatever. I guess I'm a little scared of aging-- It means losing touch with youth, getting more wrinkles, and physical deterioration. But even when I get this letter I'll still be in my twenties so maybe I should stop being so morbid. Okay, I'm seriously getting annoyed by myself, so I'll wrap this letter up. I guess this will be a neat little surprise in my inbox three years from now. Maybe I can do this again after I receive this one. PS thanks Pantsuit Politics for telling me about this. Hopefully your podcast is still going strong in 3 years. Or, ideally, Beth and Sarah will be running the country in some capacity. FUCK Donald Trump. okaythanksbyeeeee

Epilogue

about 1 year later

It's kind of a weird feeling to read this as a 26-almost-27-year old. I've been through so many changes in almost five years that I view my 22-year old self...

I nevïa sa a + ssegu albolg erasy oyu ttha od !nwo so apdniecm ot ievf llwi. .
.
Awehtrsete soloch :ioerslp am hsoj ihtw ym no hhgi i lregon. Rou adm--e coudl i dende up of tseb nlliyfa reya ietpnlhraosi igbne salt us ot fo teh in wichh veah ofr ned i grduaate htbo iddcdee s,locho ym cnisodie. Ew'rnet htrgteoe we we tgihr ahec ynhpuap dan bcyilrneid terho wree orf sutj. Ether to igdno lwel i tbu him ersya oehp onw in enat'vh kpsnoe i e'sh. .
.
Nenitr own ltcuaayl to mte ta tebs ei;rdfn gemnaar wenh na artp ym oeenmso eh dearmri i waaltmr lisepor a i swa saw im' :ii erbefo nad yeras. Asw _"__ "wlmrtaa? cislasc mofr ew dna i gnthi tgdani app eth nnreccdeeto adsesmge no rfist a imh. A vwos dneigdw ni ym up rpehas that dedne alos. .
.
Ohocsl ruaategd of ot nfiihs trsfi fo jbo ubaot yare my ma tou i 3 !!!)(. Ceaecdtp m'i a ltils i teh ot ntosiopi nyitgr fiiatinncsg resia ypa is notaerh tnceyrle hatt ahtt ftac pesscro. .
.
Sneedcier inepnapgh pu up ton gutthoh if;le that i taht i tknha haha wulod end ni ddi eht nde nogesdos tcaf ta. .
.
Wya elhl oh miet ihngva s'eehtr on kisd in 'im nsoo nya haye,. Ahev do y?oo!necm oen h,dilc a eodn i sti' hist fi and in. .
.
I aubto taps erca me gtinh: o'tnd ym armeyno abstihrdy taoub losa, rgtih eno wsa. Ohw tuboa dlo aehv afhl the i to ma i khtin ietm. .
.
Acemebr em ggia,n ti rtap uotba rpta iltls wrroy ntgiry sah me to of siht rtnaoeh of is btu. Cmose gea iomdsw am adn rfo with yerev lfie tlgefura ercineexep i dya hwich. Nitoec ma ttha oanmw uboat ot ikhtn a of sa eseilmymn i arce neorugy whti ehsotr wath me sesl tniarsgt lrgdtusge hhicw i i. "nregis yuo peitant litls utb hingeact oemr at a osne"lo i;bt lteilt uksc rae me vtseen ot be ot og i teh if lwil adn ntrece ainetpt ilfe tel nbieg. .
.
Sleveethms can dna ni siht oherts ttha fo ihst i tpsar erad ohpe see. My doevrmpi elfi a nad btu ayvtsl ni ym wree ;sryae vfei moes ahs sa taomls otylsm csine ahgsnec iiflcdfut eetrlt irfst i ive' rtwoe aely-d2o-2r snmmeei eedpreixnec rgothw miset. Houhttg apln alyp nnoe ot uto maec tis' i tnwade amostl leif funyn of ym tuo w!weh)( owh eon redticoisnp osteh dan lduwo dna yaw ti rtue. .

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