A letter from June 21st, 2018

Time Travelled — almost 3 years

Peaceful right?

Dear FutureMe, So, right now, I'm sitting in Josh and I's shared bedroom in his mom's house. I just finished my first reflection journal for the first 50 hours of my practicum at SVC. I concluded this reflection by saying that I don't want to work in campus life. So, I guess that's something. I'm broke as fuck, in so much debt I could cry, and I'm not in the best physical shape. But I also have a family I love, a wonderful man by my side, and friends that mean the world to me. So, life's not bad. Sometimes I think back to when I was like 13 or 14-- did I envision my life as it is now? I'm so fucking proud of myself for the things I've overcome-- I have a college degree, I'm halfway through grad school, and i finally have a reliable mode of transport. I think little teenage me would be pretty amazed at where I am now. So, who knows where I'll be in 3 years? Will I be close to an assistant director of residence life position? Will i even pursue residence life as my first job? There's still so much uncertainty in my life, but I'm not scared of it. So, in three years from now, I'll basically be old. Just kidding. But I'll be closer to thirty. Which is when I said I'd want kids. How will I feel in three years? Will I have a better idea of whether or not I actually want to have children? I think I chose thirty because by that time I should know what the hell I want in life, right? I'll be more stable financially I hope, and I'll be ready to decide if I want to have a child. Who knows. I'm only 22 right now, not yet 23. On another note, I realllllly don't care about any more of my birthdays. Maybe 25 because car insurance or whatever. I guess I'm a little scared of aging-- It means losing touch with youth, getting more wrinkles, and physical deterioration. But even when I get this letter I'll still be in my twenties so maybe I should stop being so morbid. Okay, I'm seriously getting annoyed by myself, so I'll wrap this letter up. I guess this will be a neat little surprise in my inbox three years from now. Maybe I can do this again after I receive this one. PS thanks Pantsuit Politics for telling me about this. Hopefully your podcast is still going strong in 3 years. Or, ideally, Beth and Sarah will be running the country in some capacity. FUCK Donald Trump. okaythanksbyeeeee

Epilogue

about 1 year later

It's kind of a weird feeling to read this as a 26-almost-27-year old. I've been through so many changes in almost five years that I view my 22-year old self...

Evïna sa so + esugs npcmidae evfi lwil laolgb uoy i o!wn eysra hatt do ot a. .
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Serwthaeet hgih twih ma ym olrgen on lrpos:ie ooshcl i sohj. Uro ym hhwic fo hl,osco gienb ade-m- eahv ihosilrnetap ddciede uldco fylialn bste ohtb i ot eary ltsa i end us fo eht draeagut ni pu fro iscdoien dneed. Ahec we ethro igthr sjtu hgrttoee eewr wte'ren ofr and yuhpnpa nbdlyrceii ew. To tbu ignod se'h eskpon ewll wno mhi reteh i i epho resay 'hvntea ni. .
.
Aarnmge msoenoe irplsoe rdarmei ym na swa bste to saw yluaatcl broefe wno a i ryeas ltawram whne emt at eh atrp rdne;if i ii: rtinen 'mi and. Gessadme dna rfom we tgnhi no __"_ hmi a scislca saw pap edcrcnoteen the gatdni srfti i a?lrat"wm. Owsv in pu ym paresh soal didwegn atht edned a. .
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Tuo taubo trsif iihsfn ym year bjo adtgeura of )!(!! ma 3 ohsocl ot fo i. Ltlsi sreia to rgiytn 'mi hte eltnrcey tsoopini csspeor that pay hatt edcptcea ntsgaiifnci si tafc a i enohart. .
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In ton tacf ahah eht up i ihnnapegp pu ddi thta ieeedrscn end htakn thuhgot atth ned ifel; doesonsg at i duwol. .
.
Sono gavinh ho im' y,hea ayn imte awy ni ksid on ellh hs'eert. 'sti a noed vahe ni ooc!meyn? od neo dna cil,dh sthi fi i. .
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Grhit olsa, my ihtgn: omenayr spat n'tdo acre asw abtou dbihstray i oen botua em. I hafl uaotb who vhea kitnh tmie i ma to ldo eth. .
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Si me gaing, tlils fo ti oywrr rtap ntiyrg uabto hsa em to hentora trap of utb racmebe htis. Dya am sidowm tihw ihcwh ftrelaug eeyvr gae i semoc orf enicereepx eilf dna. Whcih as em i i itkhn less i atth ecar twhi ownma gneruoy a srhoet ma ot dsgtleurg fo batuo sngraitt enitco enmesyiml htwa. Ot tle go rea i bit; nvseet em itpeatn ternce oyu etnipta btu ot igbne nda lilw if rin"ges ukcs hnceigat teh lliett e"slnoo llsit a eb at moer ielf. .
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See atprs oehp ni tish emesvhlset atht nca ihst eohstr arde i fo and. Wetro feiv adn yra;se e'vi tlomys utb iedcepxeren fsitr grhwto gceashn efil sah as ym i e2-drya2-lo a in satmol tavsyl fdtiifclu iestm snieemm eetrtl censi ym weer soem eovrpmdi. Tuhogth wduol lanp it my awy caem whe!(w) eonn i tou lyap fuynn nda ot adn out oen how heots ts'i teur fo oamstl dnewta feil eprnisoticd. .

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