A letter from June 21st, 2018

Time Travelled — almost 3 years

Peaceful right?

Dear FutureMe, So, right now, I'm sitting in Josh and I's shared bedroom in his mom's house. I just finished my first reflection journal for the first 50 hours of my practicum at SVC. I concluded this reflection by saying that I don't want to work in campus life. So, I guess that's something. I'm broke as fuck, in so much debt I could cry, and I'm not in the best physical shape. But I also have a family I love, a wonderful man by my side, and friends that mean the world to me. So, life's not bad. Sometimes I think back to when I was like 13 or 14-- did I envision my life as it is now? I'm so fucking proud of myself for the things I've overcome-- I have a college degree, I'm halfway through grad school, and i finally have a reliable mode of transport. I think little teenage me would be pretty amazed at where I am now. So, who knows where I'll be in 3 years? Will I be close to an assistant director of residence life position? Will i even pursue residence life as my first job? There's still so much uncertainty in my life, but I'm not scared of it. So, in three years from now, I'll basically be old. Just kidding. But I'll be closer to thirty. Which is when I said I'd want kids. How will I feel in three years? Will I have a better idea of whether or not I actually want to have children? I think I chose thirty because by that time I should know what the hell I want in life, right? I'll be more stable financially I hope, and I'll be ready to decide if I want to have a child. Who knows. I'm only 22 right now, not yet 23. On another note, I realllllly don't care about any more of my birthdays. Maybe 25 because car insurance or whatever. I guess I'm a little scared of aging-- It means losing touch with youth, getting more wrinkles, and physical deterioration. But even when I get this letter I'll still be in my twenties so maybe I should stop being so morbid. Okay, I'm seriously getting annoyed by myself, so I'll wrap this letter up. I guess this will be a neat little surprise in my inbox three years from now. Maybe I can do this again after I receive this one. PS thanks Pantsuit Politics for telling me about this. Hopefully your podcast is still going strong in 3 years. Or, ideally, Beth and Sarah will be running the country in some capacity. FUCK Donald Trump. okaythanksbyeeeee

Epilogue

about 1 year later

It's kind of a weird feeling to read this as a 26-almost-27-year old. I've been through so many changes in almost five years that I view my 22-year old self...

You i atth od ievf os lliw ot lgbaol vaneï nw!o yrsae a as cminadep gessu +. .
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I am sohj ym on lgrone ihgh lsoohc hitw respoi:l aresehwtet. I nylialf soepnriailht i my aeargdtu edincios ebts vhae den wchhi slhoco, het lsta to enedd fro mea-d- fo otbh of su edddcie up being in reay luodc rou. Phyanpu oetrh oehrettg ew ofr hrtgi nrwtee' aehc ciydlbiren reew jstu nda we. I npseok e'sh rehet sreay dnogi i ni eohp ot hmi nwo nhav'te tbu lelw. .
.
Uallctya sbte wtrmlaa to an wsa 'im berfoe erntin ierdnf; eh onoemes henw my atrp ii: oeirpsl i nmgeara now syera swa tme a drmarie at i and. App saw i we a essadmge itngh sclasci nda rfom ihm tml"a?wra sitfr _"__ on tganid the rcncdotenee. In a wsov pu my perhas wgieddn ttha eednd loas. .
.
Ot oclohs out iisfnh ym tfris of )!!!( 3 am aragtued i ojb abtou aery fo. The that atht caft i ceeytnlr tslil yap a im' is to trnigy ioonitsp niaginictfs iersa eossrcp eacecdpt oartnhe. .
.
Ipegahnnp pu in i atcf thnak up idd ned dnosesog aahh het at ont atht hogttuh dneceseir wolud end i tath eil;f. .
.
Onos in hlle 'srhete skid yna on ho 'mi ngiahv temi awy ,ahye. Ce!onoym? a ehav eno fi i'st tihs adn edon i do ih,dlc ni. .
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Em oen sola, yemraon autbo asw ym dton' i caer aibhysrtd tsap ht:nig autob higrt. Hvae lod hte i baotu ma kinth to i lfha ohw item. .
.
Fo hsa of iths em ngiga, tub ot em gnityr ti si yworr aotehrn butoa rpat listl trpa bmaerce. Ihwch somec dya am efrltaug age fro nad i yeerv tiwh peeicrexen idomsw efil. Lsse wichh arec i atht neogyru intsartg athw uaotb me i am tdggslrue onamw sa cotnei tiknh i ot wthi of a srehot nymsmeeil. Etnves og tle bengi ta necter feil eth lletti ins"egr ose"lno me sltil if hgeiantc oerm b;ti but tenapit to nda be ukcs uoy i iaetptn era illw a ot. .
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Vhlmeesste acn in this of sthi ader atht adn i shorte ohpe tarps ees. ;ayrse ivfe hegnsac nad lteret tub wtero fldiiufct tmloas eemsmni ym ahs moes itesm rohwtg i sa esnic ie'v -o-rey22ald sloymt vmopdeir ym eilf lvysat tifrs erwe rxedeienepc a ni. Onen adn oseth my owh ltsamo tuhhotg tewdan etur wwh()e! i ti noe of way came ulwdo fiel to iorctdsiepn adn alpy out t'is fnyun npla tou. .

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