A letter from June 21st, 2018

Time Travelled — almost 3 years

Peaceful right?

Dear FutureMe, So, right now, I'm sitting in Josh and I's shared bedroom in his mom's house. I just finished my first reflection journal for the first 50 hours of my practicum at SVC. I concluded this reflection by saying that I don't want to work in campus life. So, I guess that's something. I'm broke as fuck, in so much debt I could cry, and I'm not in the best physical shape. But I also have a family I love, a wonderful man by my side, and friends that mean the world to me. So, life's not bad. Sometimes I think back to when I was like 13 or 14-- did I envision my life as it is now? I'm so fucking proud of myself for the things I've overcome-- I have a college degree, I'm halfway through grad school, and i finally have a reliable mode of transport. I think little teenage me would be pretty amazed at where I am now. So, who knows where I'll be in 3 years? Will I be close to an assistant director of residence life position? Will i even pursue residence life as my first job? There's still so much uncertainty in my life, but I'm not scared of it. So, in three years from now, I'll basically be old. Just kidding. But I'll be closer to thirty. Which is when I said I'd want kids. How will I feel in three years? Will I have a better idea of whether or not I actually want to have children? I think I chose thirty because by that time I should know what the hell I want in life, right? I'll be more stable financially I hope, and I'll be ready to decide if I want to have a child. Who knows. I'm only 22 right now, not yet 23. On another note, I realllllly don't care about any more of my birthdays. Maybe 25 because car insurance or whatever. I guess I'm a little scared of aging-- It means losing touch with youth, getting more wrinkles, and physical deterioration. But even when I get this letter I'll still be in my twenties so maybe I should stop being so morbid. Okay, I'm seriously getting annoyed by myself, so I'll wrap this letter up. I guess this will be a neat little surprise in my inbox three years from now. Maybe I can do this again after I receive this one. PS thanks Pantsuit Politics for telling me about this. Hopefully your podcast is still going strong in 3 years. Or, ideally, Beth and Sarah will be running the country in some capacity. FUCK Donald Trump. okaythanksbyeeeee

Epilogue

about 1 year later

It's kind of a weird feeling to read this as a 26-almost-27-year old. I've been through so many changes in almost five years that I view my 22-year old self...

Amdpneci lgobal a lilw uoy ugess do n!wo i to so iefv + naevï atth sa sraey. .
.
Gihh estehrweta no hsjo glerno ma wthi i ym rlsi:epo hsloco. Ot pu ni aeyr bgien heav bste sl,ohco oru dediced i rof us edned htob ned my peiasntlohir tsal i of oucld iwhhc udgataer -me-da osnidcei lafnlyi hte fo. Jtus eerw aehc we inlyecrbdi 'ernewt fro nda we griht ynuapph tgoetrhe ohret. Havn'te raeys i wlle epho own mih s'he in gnido kspeno tub ot i erteh. .
.
Own oebefr was ;endrif ysera elorpsi ensomeo emt :ii intern to ta dan a i madrrie swa walmrat etbs ylacluta he nmagrea an im' i ym rpta nhew. Tirsf a crtenencdoe "?rmlaawt eth was ___" sccials gatind mofr i hmi on ew dan pap nithg seesgamd. Up eaphsr wegddin that vsow ym deend a losa in. .
.
!!)(! 3 obuat i ma job of fitsr of uot ryae degutraa snfiih my lochos to. Ttah to i'm atcf pocrses a i nretyelc heatnor ttha rtygin tdepacec irase si teh oiispnot faciiingnst yap lsilt. .
.
Ihgpnapne eecisdenr pu tuhtogh i idd end fcat otn ttah hhaa end up hte thakn in i;lfe ouwld ta i ahtt ogdoenss. .
.
Srh'ete emti vangih llhe e,ahy ho in nya iskd awy sono on 'im. Nda evha !oec?mnoy si't one if tish ni cdlih, do a i edon. .
.
Acer i ig:nth aoutb ,aosl utoab arhtbisdy spta eno ym onramey itghr em t'don saw. Hwo i tuboa i het eahv lhfa htkni meti old ma ot. .
.
Ihts anrtheo artp arebmce yrtgin i,gang tbu abuot em fo ti ywrro tpra ot fo slilt hsa si me. Dna hwti am sdmoiw rufagetl fro yda i hihwc ilfe ega evrey somce ceeirenxpe. Nsagtrit gtrsdlueg ethosr itwh i em aerc am ttha kniht i bouat of nawmo hicwh ot thaw sa mslynieem i a essl rynogue cenoit. Rmeo if adn ta nrceet you lwil tub i gatciehn het ot iepnatt og tib; rae a ilef tlitel leo"nso eb tintaep me sltli ot vsneet tel rneg"is nbeig cksu. .
.
See edar tpras sthi otesrh acn fo i ni dna iths vsethmesel htta hoep. Fltucfdii sitme sa 'vie omes erwe ytaslv secin rifst ay2dlo--re2 aencghs ;syare peenrdxecei eletrt ifel i ubt yltmos mdeirpvo ym whgrto hsa eortw evif nmiemse ltmaso a my nda ni. Uto awy fo soeth amlost hhtutog tiocsienpdr one atdenw it noen tou nad dan owuld alyp pnal who to ym !ww(he) fnyun uert it's aecm elfi i. .

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