A letter from June 21st, 2018

Time Travelled — almost 3 years

Peaceful right?

Dear FutureMe, So, right now, I'm sitting in Josh and I's shared bedroom in his mom's house. I just finished my first reflection journal for the first 50 hours of my practicum at SVC. I concluded this reflection by saying that I don't want to work in campus life. So, I guess that's something. I'm broke as fuck, in so much debt I could cry, and I'm not in the best physical shape. But I also have a family I love, a wonderful man by my side, and friends that mean the world to me. So, life's not bad. Sometimes I think back to when I was like 13 or 14-- did I envision my life as it is now? I'm so fucking proud of myself for the things I've overcome-- I have a college degree, I'm halfway through grad school, and i finally have a reliable mode of transport. I think little teenage me would be pretty amazed at where I am now. So, who knows where I'll be in 3 years? Will I be close to an assistant director of residence life position? Will i even pursue residence life as my first job? There's still so much uncertainty in my life, but I'm not scared of it. So, in three years from now, I'll basically be old. Just kidding. But I'll be closer to thirty. Which is when I said I'd want kids. How will I feel in three years? Will I have a better idea of whether or not I actually want to have children? I think I chose thirty because by that time I should know what the hell I want in life, right? I'll be more stable financially I hope, and I'll be ready to decide if I want to have a child. Who knows. I'm only 22 right now, not yet 23. On another note, I realllllly don't care about any more of my birthdays. Maybe 25 because car insurance or whatever. I guess I'm a little scared of aging-- It means losing touch with youth, getting more wrinkles, and physical deterioration. But even when I get this letter I'll still be in my twenties so maybe I should stop being so morbid. Okay, I'm seriously getting annoyed by myself, so I'll wrap this letter up. I guess this will be a neat little surprise in my inbox three years from now. Maybe I can do this again after I receive this one. PS thanks Pantsuit Politics for telling me about this. Hopefully your podcast is still going strong in 3 years. Or, ideally, Beth and Sarah will be running the country in some capacity. FUCK Donald Trump. okaythanksbyeeeee

Epilogue

about 1 year later

It's kind of a weird feeling to read this as a 26-almost-27-year old. I've been through so many changes in almost five years that I view my 22-year old self...

A wno! meaincdp to gusse lilw os efiv + eysra ttha do eanvï yuo as i baglol. .
.
Am rteewshaet sjoh los:iepr clohso high my i on groenl thiw. Of dm--ae cihwh to us fo soinlrpitahe vaeh dnieocis eingb ned pu i tasl teh ratugdea htob ddeiedc ohl,cos linafyl lduoc oru i in arye ym eednd bets rof. Toerh hrgit adn 'tewenr for chae nhappuy icnrdybeli we usjt ewre we gehrttoe. Lewl i pohe but ni 'seh ihm poensk igdno won i ot sayre ve'atnh ehrte. .
.
Ym i met tniner hewn aawrmlt won etbs gmnarae aws adn i a eebrfo spierlo an aysre i'm :ii tarp at e;fdnir to he atluacyl osmenoe irramed aws. Hte lrat?"wma wsa ngaidt ndcorecente we siacslc ppa _"__ a on ormf i hmi sgesdmea igthn nda tirsf. Loas ngdwied thta eeddn in ym wvso pshera up a. .
.
Otu raey boaut rfits !!)!( i hiisfn job socolh 3 am fo rtauedag fo ot ym. Tignry a acft pya hatt inospiot i ot sllti sesrpoc i'm ectacpde nifsiactnig saire aneroht eclntrye is the htat. .
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Nktha end ngepnpiah in uhtghot i that eth i pu pu nceisreed ddi end nto tcaf at sgesodno ahtt aahh ;leif doulw. .
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Nay he'etrs ehy,a im' iemt ni oh sono ayw no ngahiv sdik elhl. I t'si a chil,d ehav neod neo dan od oo!nym?ec ni fi ihts. .
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Arce aslo, otuba dthisrbay do'tn ermnoya me tin:gh wsa ghtri noe my tbauo ptas i. Vhae i ma thkin tmie dol woh ahfl otuab to teh i. .
.
Fo ahs trpa uaotb btu fo rateohn si ryrwo isht ratp stlli cmeebar ginryt ga,ngi it em me ot. Nad cseom veeyr rutfegal am gae ofr eieexcrnep hhwic whti isdwom ayd efil i. Ygoeunr tsglredug sa emsmiynle i wthi a eoncit em i hhcwi oubat htta nhtik eohrst raec tangrtis i aonwm wtha to esls am of. To ouy inctgeha envtes tanetip titlel dan "rnseig if tiptane a uskc ecnetr eilf ubt ta itlls liwl giben remo em i to etl be s"leono bi;t go era het. .
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Ihts of ni poeh ratsp see sehemeltsv i cna thta sthi arde and stheor. Dovrpemi asltvy etrwo eltetr stfir ncsei gorwht rwee ni lotmsy aotmls ym items ae;ysr ash ra2-d-yo2le crnxideeepe ifve enghcsa ubt as elif a semo i v'ie ym and tlffuicid menisem. Oltasm (w)weh! nseitidprco tou ym way and meca ndaewt s'it nad out hhogttu uert dolwu of woh neo i ti fnuyn file enno to etsho lnpa lapy. .

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