A letter from June 21st, 2018

Time Travelled — almost 3 years

Peaceful right?

Dear FutureMe, So, right now, I'm sitting in Josh and I's shared bedroom in his mom's house. I just finished my first reflection journal for the first 50 hours of my practicum at SVC. I concluded this reflection by saying that I don't want to work in campus life. So, I guess that's something. I'm broke as fuck, in so much debt I could cry, and I'm not in the best physical shape. But I also have a family I love, a wonderful man by my side, and friends that mean the world to me. So, life's not bad. Sometimes I think back to when I was like 13 or 14-- did I envision my life as it is now? I'm so fucking proud of myself for the things I've overcome-- I have a college degree, I'm halfway through grad school, and i finally have a reliable mode of transport. I think little teenage me would be pretty amazed at where I am now. So, who knows where I'll be in 3 years? Will I be close to an assistant director of residence life position? Will i even pursue residence life as my first job? There's still so much uncertainty in my life, but I'm not scared of it. So, in three years from now, I'll basically be old. Just kidding. But I'll be closer to thirty. Which is when I said I'd want kids. How will I feel in three years? Will I have a better idea of whether or not I actually want to have children? I think I chose thirty because by that time I should know what the hell I want in life, right? I'll be more stable financially I hope, and I'll be ready to decide if I want to have a child. Who knows. I'm only 22 right now, not yet 23. On another note, I realllllly don't care about any more of my birthdays. Maybe 25 because car insurance or whatever. I guess I'm a little scared of aging-- It means losing touch with youth, getting more wrinkles, and physical deterioration. But even when I get this letter I'll still be in my twenties so maybe I should stop being so morbid. Okay, I'm seriously getting annoyed by myself, so I'll wrap this letter up. I guess this will be a neat little surprise in my inbox three years from now. Maybe I can do this again after I receive this one. PS thanks Pantsuit Politics for telling me about this. Hopefully your podcast is still going strong in 3 years. Or, ideally, Beth and Sarah will be running the country in some capacity. FUCK Donald Trump. okaythanksbyeeeee

Epilogue

about 1 year later

It's kind of a weird feeling to read this as a 26-almost-27-year old. I've been through so many changes in almost five years that I view my 22-year old self...

+ yuo as to lgobal a cmpniead uessg fevi i o!nw erysa ïenav illw so do atth. .
.
Whetaetres thiw shjo :soprile ym i hhgi oscolh am on enorgl. My edn ot i orf tauadreg us isoplnietahr eht tsla ruo ncisoeid ryae tbho sc,lhoo ehva steb i neded nfayill of fo gnieb dicedde in lcuod up hwhic -eadm-. Weer ew tusj rtgih yicdnlerib yhppnau tohre we haec ethgtoer dna ertwne' for. Ot peho ni tah'env ellw eerht pnoske hmi 'hes won gndoi rasye i i but. .
.
Seomone an i stbe asw ehwn rieramd ta rapt i ersipol n;drife mte rboefe grmnaae a resay tuayllca im' wramtla he etninr adn ii: own ot my asw. A lmaartw?" on i we hmi nedcncoeret saw nigtda __"_ sislacc form adgssmee ngtih ppa sirft and teh. Osla swvo in dgewind ahtt deden hrpsea a pu my. .
.
Rifts choslo of ugdrtaea yare 3 uot isfhin am ot otbau i fo ym job (!!)!. Apy csnftangiii 'mi is ncteyrel oheantr tilsl i tcaf to sprcseo iryntg iersa notpisio acedetpc a hatt eth htat. .
.
The in sdrceniee hutghto i ahha up nde ton htnak oldwu dne at that pu sngdoeos idd ifel; ftac naeignpph ttha i. .
.
Yaw noso eeshr't in teim hell ya,eh nya ho sidk no m'i inhvag. I fi do done shti eon veha cihdl, a o!emo?ncy nad in tis'. .
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Rtydbsaih i me ym meryona uotba eno aspt thgri swa ntgi:h 'ntod ouatb ecra sao,l. Am etim odl to hte afhl i i obtau avhe nhitk who. .
.
Fo rwory me it tub shti listl si me mrecabe arpt nrytig ash ot of tpar nraetho buoat ,angig. Hwit yad yever age orf ilfe i mocse wchhi rgfualet ma mwisdo ercpxeiene and. Awth tubao oincte gsnairtt of esls rsutdgelg atth acer emisyenlm me i ihcwh am sa omnwa hiktn i ot tehrso htiw a ouygnre i. Moer elitlt i wlli enapitt era tneipat og tel me retnce teenvs ltsil be to bnige ouy enictagh oeo"nls ot suck ifel ta ers"nig adn if het tbi; tbu a. .
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Sotrhe i dna artsp of ihst nca thta opeh rdae ni hseslevemt ees this. Trteel tirsf asmotl -2rlyo2-ade ni my fvei avylts secni toerw smtie myslto i iciudflft re;say eerw sgeahcn adn exnreceiedp nemsmie ifel my sa sha ervmdiop a seom 'vei troghw ubt. Lapn ruet maec who oen of i'ts somalt dna ti lduow my tsohe htuhogt i fnuny plya dna ywa nweatd out tou nneo )eh(!ww lfei sdonpiitrce ot. .

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