A letter from June 21st, 2018

Time Travelled — almost 3 years

Peaceful right?

Dear FutureMe, So, right now, I'm sitting in Josh and I's shared bedroom in his mom's house. I just finished my first reflection journal for the first 50 hours of my practicum at SVC. I concluded this reflection by saying that I don't want to work in campus life. So, I guess that's something. I'm broke as fuck, in so much debt I could cry, and I'm not in the best physical shape. But I also have a family I love, a wonderful man by my side, and friends that mean the world to me. So, life's not bad. Sometimes I think back to when I was like 13 or 14-- did I envision my life as it is now? I'm so fucking proud of myself for the things I've overcome-- I have a college degree, I'm halfway through grad school, and i finally have a reliable mode of transport. I think little teenage me would be pretty amazed at where I am now. So, who knows where I'll be in 3 years? Will I be close to an assistant director of residence life position? Will i even pursue residence life as my first job? There's still so much uncertainty in my life, but I'm not scared of it. So, in three years from now, I'll basically be old. Just kidding. But I'll be closer to thirty. Which is when I said I'd want kids. How will I feel in three years? Will I have a better idea of whether or not I actually want to have children? I think I chose thirty because by that time I should know what the hell I want in life, right? I'll be more stable financially I hope, and I'll be ready to decide if I want to have a child. Who knows. I'm only 22 right now, not yet 23. On another note, I realllllly don't care about any more of my birthdays. Maybe 25 because car insurance or whatever. I guess I'm a little scared of aging-- It means losing touch with youth, getting more wrinkles, and physical deterioration. But even when I get this letter I'll still be in my twenties so maybe I should stop being so morbid. Okay, I'm seriously getting annoyed by myself, so I'll wrap this letter up. I guess this will be a neat little surprise in my inbox three years from now. Maybe I can do this again after I receive this one. PS thanks Pantsuit Politics for telling me about this. Hopefully your podcast is still going strong in 3 years. Or, ideally, Beth and Sarah will be running the country in some capacity. FUCK Donald Trump. okaythanksbyeeeee

Epilogue

about 1 year later

It's kind of a weird feeling to read this as a 26-almost-27-year old. I've been through so many changes in almost five years that I view my 22-year old self...

N!wo do sa + sesgu ttha ot oglbal evaïn oyu a vife os i llwi mencadip eryas. .
.
Golnre my ma :iperols olhsoc shjo no high wretheeast wthi i. Reay eriinahlospt to eedcdid my thbo duclo inbeg for su fo i our dgraetua wihch pu the lyfnlia sloohc, edend d-ma-e aveh ltas fo i ni edcisnio estb edn. For adn we egtthreo we ewer roeht gtrih jstu ertn'we hcea eyribdlnci nappyuh. Nidgo ysrae hope won ether ubt onkesp to in s'he well i 'ahetnv mhi i. .
.
Tem to m'i a i he tayaullc nad ;drfein ptar asw ehwn nraegma my i at ipolsre dmeiarr stbe i:i rtenni was ayres eofrbe now na meonoes raatmlw. Imh i lassicc we was a on siftr the ama"twlr? rmfo gmdseeas endorcnecte adn intgh atingd ___" pap. Ginedwd in hesrpa osal ddene ym hatt pu wosv a. .
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Raey ot sifinh ym ma fo 3 taobu trfsi hlcsoo of job out i ()!!! reaagtud. Epsorsc m'i hte ersia afct llsti eccetdpa a trniyg ot spoitoin pay teronah si atth leycrten hatt i asigntifnci. .
.
Idd nde i ni ludow ahtt atth pu eth ahha nathk noegdsso atfc edn erdniecse i up i;lef gnepanhip ogutthh ton at. .
.
Hlle strhee' yna no nviahg ni ho wya i'm meit sdik osno ,ehay. Ce!omnoy? fi eon i ih,cld eahv do ni ti's done a and hist. .
.
Taps abuto gnht:i crea my myanero toaub aws irbasydth one od'tn em sa,ol i rithg. Eitm i old teh i alfh ktnhi am tauob who ahve ot. .
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G,igan iytgrn patr emcaber fo ehtnora me owryr ot it tshi em but si arpt lsilt btauo of sha. Augfetlr htwi for ma gae hchiw i dya and eervy ielf wismdo ecoms eeicnprxee. Ot ciwhh thwi tneioc eroths a khnit sa urdstelgg toabu nwmoa me i ahtt of i erygnuo tawh atrtisgn am cear semilyenm i slse. ;bit a life the uyo etl kusc nda me ta tslil era utb itltel i ibneg egi"srn fi eb tncere roem ot tcnhgeai to teinatp olo"nes og tvesne lwil titepna. .
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Ethsselmve nac i of ees dan drae atth in htsi isht hroste ehop pstra. I my owhtrg ni hcgensa file as;yre evfi eieenxperdc e'vi mmsneie o-yradl2-2e ysavtl rftsi nad worte as fclitfuid eerw etism edomirvp a etetrl my altmso niesc osem ash soytml but. Owh wya nda alyp fo rtue out ehots oldwu ti moslta and i (e)!wwh tuo nneo tugthoh ti's disptcienro ym oen to lefi emca npal awtden ufynn. .

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