A letter from June 21st, 2018

Time Travelled — almost 3 years

Peaceful right?

Dear FutureMe, So, right now, I'm sitting in Josh and I's shared bedroom in his mom's house. I just finished my first reflection journal for the first 50 hours of my practicum at SVC. I concluded this reflection by saying that I don't want to work in campus life. So, I guess that's something. I'm broke as fuck, in so much debt I could cry, and I'm not in the best physical shape. But I also have a family I love, a wonderful man by my side, and friends that mean the world to me. So, life's not bad. Sometimes I think back to when I was like 13 or 14-- did I envision my life as it is now? I'm so fucking proud of myself for the things I've overcome-- I have a college degree, I'm halfway through grad school, and i finally have a reliable mode of transport. I think little teenage me would be pretty amazed at where I am now. So, who knows where I'll be in 3 years? Will I be close to an assistant director of residence life position? Will i even pursue residence life as my first job? There's still so much uncertainty in my life, but I'm not scared of it. So, in three years from now, I'll basically be old. Just kidding. But I'll be closer to thirty. Which is when I said I'd want kids. How will I feel in three years? Will I have a better idea of whether or not I actually want to have children? I think I chose thirty because by that time I should know what the hell I want in life, right? I'll be more stable financially I hope, and I'll be ready to decide if I want to have a child. Who knows. I'm only 22 right now, not yet 23. On another note, I realllllly don't care about any more of my birthdays. Maybe 25 because car insurance or whatever. I guess I'm a little scared of aging-- It means losing touch with youth, getting more wrinkles, and physical deterioration. But even when I get this letter I'll still be in my twenties so maybe I should stop being so morbid. Okay, I'm seriously getting annoyed by myself, so I'll wrap this letter up. I guess this will be a neat little surprise in my inbox three years from now. Maybe I can do this again after I receive this one. PS thanks Pantsuit Politics for telling me about this. Hopefully your podcast is still going strong in 3 years. Or, ideally, Beth and Sarah will be running the country in some capacity. FUCK Donald Trump. okaythanksbyeeeee

Epilogue

about 1 year later

It's kind of a weird feeling to read this as a 26-almost-27-year old. I've been through so many changes in almost five years that I view my 22-year old self...

Sesgu veanï lagolb + will to as uoy ysaer eifv od a w!on cadipemn i os atth. .
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No hgih olhosc sjoh ym r:poelsi eheatsertw ihwt elgorn i ma. Uro ugtearad up sbte cwhhi alts ratinehipslo ddeen teh fo su fniylla ciddeed idsoenci a-dem- ot of i orf aery i olduc hotb gneib evah den ni my hsloco,. Throe nuphapy juts we ew grhit rwee ofr ergettoh ceiidlbrny aech eertwn' nad. Thnave' i mih won raesy elwl epksno ohpe in tub eh's hrtee i to dngio. .
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Saw a he raaegnm aeidrmr fdrni;e at amatrlw mi' ienrnt taylcual nwhe eboerf i ot ii: atrp nda etm bets wsa yares wno i oeoemsn my rlespio an. Ofmr itgnda sameegsd saw a i __"_ him ew rfsit tr"wmal?a casslci ppa teh no necdnoetcer nad ghitn. Sovw sloa niwdged srpaeh a in htta up ndede ym. .
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!!!)( inhsfi of clsoho otu tareadgu tifsr ubtoa obj yare to 3 i am ym fo. Lslit catf ahtt ntohare rngtiy is the ttah srspeoc a i i'm nsitpooi sirea ftiaingncis ccadeept tnecrely ot apy. .
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I in den idd nseoogsd ;lfei tath i duolw apnphinge the up pu tahkn uohtgth den otn ta esndrecei ahah tcfa ttah. .
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Mtei ho seerh't ni ihagnv ksdi on lhel ayn h,eya awy i'm onso. Ehav st'i ony!ecm?o ihst i hcid,l fi enod a noe and in od. .
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Em gtrih ynrmeoa race swa n'tdo ti:gnh one i sao,l atsp my botua yahibtsdr abotu. I tuoab i am hvea how emti dol eht ntkhi hafl to. .
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Of fo orwyr ygtinr ti em hist ot aobtu eonhart stlil ratp ahs ubt reaecmb ptra gign,a si em. Iwosmd ma soecm rof and eifl i lfruateg iwchh gae dya tihw yvere pieexrncee. Ot nktih twah tlgreusdg ctenio mnliemesy a fo less em ahtt grattins i as wchhi twhi i rhesot bouta omawn acre ygnroeu am i. Etatpni etillt sneg"ri to tills tptaien feil llwi i fi sonoe"l b;ti a het senevt nad go to ecnter btu uoy sukc lte ta era ghtaienc rmeo eb em gbein. .
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Sthi raed shtreo nad in tarsp thta thvselmese itsh i of ees anc hepo. Were togwhr vi'e moystl neseimm dpeeeirenxc scengah sah ry;sea lfie ym mtoals ftudiicfl roewt my csnie meos feiv sfrit epridmov emist slytav in as a tbu and tetrel 2rado2el-y- i. Out ym of nnyfu lfei out adn stohe ouhghtt aypl eonn rinceiptsdo how it teru dna ceam e(whw!) douwl dtewan oen ostlam i si't ywa to nalp. .

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