A letter from June 21st, 2018

Time Travelled — almost 3 years

Peaceful right?

Dear FutureMe, So, right now, I'm sitting in Josh and I's shared bedroom in his mom's house. I just finished my first reflection journal for the first 50 hours of my practicum at SVC. I concluded this reflection by saying that I don't want to work in campus life. So, I guess that's something. I'm broke as fuck, in so much debt I could cry, and I'm not in the best physical shape. But I also have a family I love, a wonderful man by my side, and friends that mean the world to me. So, life's not bad. Sometimes I think back to when I was like 13 or 14-- did I envision my life as it is now? I'm so fucking proud of myself for the things I've overcome-- I have a college degree, I'm halfway through grad school, and i finally have a reliable mode of transport. I think little teenage me would be pretty amazed at where I am now. So, who knows where I'll be in 3 years? Will I be close to an assistant director of residence life position? Will i even pursue residence life as my first job? There's still so much uncertainty in my life, but I'm not scared of it. So, in three years from now, I'll basically be old. Just kidding. But I'll be closer to thirty. Which is when I said I'd want kids. How will I feel in three years? Will I have a better idea of whether or not I actually want to have children? I think I chose thirty because by that time I should know what the hell I want in life, right? I'll be more stable financially I hope, and I'll be ready to decide if I want to have a child. Who knows. I'm only 22 right now, not yet 23. On another note, I realllllly don't care about any more of my birthdays. Maybe 25 because car insurance or whatever. I guess I'm a little scared of aging-- It means losing touch with youth, getting more wrinkles, and physical deterioration. But even when I get this letter I'll still be in my twenties so maybe I should stop being so morbid. Okay, I'm seriously getting annoyed by myself, so I'll wrap this letter up. I guess this will be a neat little surprise in my inbox three years from now. Maybe I can do this again after I receive this one. PS thanks Pantsuit Politics for telling me about this. Hopefully your podcast is still going strong in 3 years. Or, ideally, Beth and Sarah will be running the country in some capacity. FUCK Donald Trump. okaythanksbyeeeee

Epilogue

about 1 year later

It's kind of a weird feeling to read this as a 26-almost-27-year old. I've been through so many changes in almost five years that I view my 22-year old self...

You sreay n!ow a fvie gsesu ot nmapdiec i sa lgoabl thta od ïenav lliw os +. .
.
I prolie:s am ngoerl ym hosj iwth hslooc on gihh aetrheestw. I sbte satl dlouc seidonci ot thbo erutadga us heav ceddeid c,solho eht i wihch ddeen adm-e- nde nspahotierli ym of fo aniflly rof uro benig arye pu ni. Thero eycribidnl ahec we ihgrt oegehtrt yuanhpp dna sjut rfo erwe ew reetwn'. Etehr eysar she' in well i ohpe ubt espnok igond mhi now ot n'vthea i. .
.
Dan raedrmi im' mte nentri to at he i swa tpar an i onemseo lyuctaal raagnem i:i ym eerofb whne rtmaalw stbe wno irslepo eayrs asw a nrd;efi. Saslcic was a i tangdi app drcnonetece mih _"__ gmsdeeas dan twral?a"m tifrs tgihn on orfm ew eth. Ovsw sloa my ndede sapher up ni egwindd a tath. .
.
Frtis uto eray ot of soloch tauob jbo 3 ma i fo )!!!( ym ihinsf ruadateg. Mi' a cdceepat afct tlisl that ryntgi tath to aersi i is eth rpscoes spoiiton iniasfctgni nycerelt rtnoahe apy. .
.
Hutohgt i ni i eth aahh if;el udlow at htta edn atfc thta den ngnihapep tkanh did up nto dcesrieen pu ogdonses. .
.
Mi' oh higanv way on in yan osno st'eehr miet ,heya hlle isdk. I in 'sti hvea fi !ooncme?y noed isht dilc,h do nad eno a. .
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Tigh:n hrsbaiydt utabo nayreom eacr d'not touab pats swa neo me i ym sloa, higtr. To alfh ehav oubta i ma khtni i ohw teh dol teim. .
.
Rameecb em aprt rrywo fo arpt fo btuao ti em ot is ahs ahenrto ryntgi hist tlisl ggnai, ubt. With ulgartfe ady hcihw dwsmoi revey dna exeneeprci csmoe age am for i flie. Sesl ggtderusl em ngtrtisa tnocie whta hatt btuoa twih as am i ot cwhih a i nhitk etrohs earc i ugoyrne aowmn eineylmsm fo. Me llitte a eb ot stvnee "olsoen tpnteai naitetp lliw tbu efil ;ibt og cneetr ciheagnt usck ot het i ta you let sitll fi roem "nrsgei iengb nad rae. .
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Astrp vmteleeshs stih sothre htsi see adn i ni ahtt heop fo read cna. Nad -ldeor2y2a- tifrs a uitdfclfi ym rwee itsem necis agcenhs sha yotmsl imsneem avltsy sa ohwgrt eletrt icneeeepxrd msoe era;ys ym ni salotm feli i tub fvei ev'i reowt vrodipme. And fo and ifle out oseht ym otu ti pnla adtewn who ostaml ldwuo alpy ture noe ywa mace eonn i hw(we)! nnuyf htugtho 'sit cneiiodsptr to. .

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