A letter from June 21st, 2018

Time Travelled — almost 3 years

Peaceful right?

Dear FutureMe, So, right now, I'm sitting in Josh and I's shared bedroom in his mom's house. I just finished my first reflection journal for the first 50 hours of my practicum at SVC. I concluded this reflection by saying that I don't want to work in campus life. So, I guess that's something. I'm broke as fuck, in so much debt I could cry, and I'm not in the best physical shape. But I also have a family I love, a wonderful man by my side, and friends that mean the world to me. So, life's not bad. Sometimes I think back to when I was like 13 or 14-- did I envision my life as it is now? I'm so fucking proud of myself for the things I've overcome-- I have a college degree, I'm halfway through grad school, and i finally have a reliable mode of transport. I think little teenage me would be pretty amazed at where I am now. So, who knows where I'll be in 3 years? Will I be close to an assistant director of residence life position? Will i even pursue residence life as my first job? There's still so much uncertainty in my life, but I'm not scared of it. So, in three years from now, I'll basically be old. Just kidding. But I'll be closer to thirty. Which is when I said I'd want kids. How will I feel in three years? Will I have a better idea of whether or not I actually want to have children? I think I chose thirty because by that time I should know what the hell I want in life, right? I'll be more stable financially I hope, and I'll be ready to decide if I want to have a child. Who knows. I'm only 22 right now, not yet 23. On another note, I realllllly don't care about any more of my birthdays. Maybe 25 because car insurance or whatever. I guess I'm a little scared of aging-- It means losing touch with youth, getting more wrinkles, and physical deterioration. But even when I get this letter I'll still be in my twenties so maybe I should stop being so morbid. Okay, I'm seriously getting annoyed by myself, so I'll wrap this letter up. I guess this will be a neat little surprise in my inbox three years from now. Maybe I can do this again after I receive this one. PS thanks Pantsuit Politics for telling me about this. Hopefully your podcast is still going strong in 3 years. Or, ideally, Beth and Sarah will be running the country in some capacity. FUCK Donald Trump. okaythanksbyeeeee

Epilogue

about 1 year later

It's kind of a weird feeling to read this as a 26-almost-27-year old. I've been through so many changes in almost five years that I view my 22-year old self...

Wlil ïanve os as gessu lalogb + ersya pamindce i ievf you do nwo! to a thta. .
.
Ehettwresa shoj ersop:il ma ym on ithw i high neolrg oolsch. Enedd up augdtear su ot which fo duclo in of my yaer poiiatlherns egbni rou salt h,losco alliynf teh veha orf doineics etbs tboh den eeidcdd i -ae-md i. Eorthetg ew erew orf ahec nad 'wtrnee we toreh yunhapp idrcnelybi tgrhi tjsu. Noksep ni i igond but to i imh hope yesra 'hentav s'he rhete onw llwe. .
.
Rteinn swa at estb isreplo oonmese adn aws esary i ym oefber lyctuala eh a i ratp ii: mngaaer nehw dfnei;r to wltrmaa iamredr wno im' an etm. Aws eht esmdsgae tdagin no sitfr him cislasc ithgn __"_ app i ra"tma?lw nad ofrm noeretenccd a ew. Svwo up ni dndee a endwgid asol hsaper ym htat. .
.
Firts 3 of boj uobta grudatea out oolchs )!!!( eyar isnfhi ma of ot my i. Eornaht aisnfntiigc itlls resia is a ynceletr atfc i htat ipnstoio tepcdcea het pcseros m'i ot hatt igtryn ypa. .
.
Aahh up niangpeph het oghttuh ned not that cfat i at hnkta lf;ei ned duwlo ttha idd csienerde in esndgoso i up. .
.
Yan no emti ni ywa ha,ey oosn ho mi' nigvha dsik serhe't llhe. If tsi' veha do and i in oden neo a moeoyc?!n itsh hlic,d. .
.
Me :igthn i aubto earc 'ndot gthri aspt lao,s dyabrsthi mearnyo was noe ubtoa my. To eahv i i tuabo ma hwo teim lod lfah tkihn hte. .
.
Has it is rpta obtua rywro fo ot tllsi sthi gna,gi bcamree fo em but artp em trhaoen yignrt. Cnerxeeiep am file swdimo i gltafuer yda ega htiw dan yeevr wihhc fro cseom. Esgutdrgl fo guroeyn elss wnoma sa ma cear i htaw i a me hesort hhiwc tath oatub ot misnemeyl eitcon thwi gnrtstai i tknhi. Ensl"oo flie lelitt nda eetncr fi be i go eginb hecginta sllit ubt cuks em anteitp mreo yuo tle wlil "siegnr b;it a ot etsven aer ta etanpti eth ot. .
.
I dna acn in shit prats shit thta roehts dear lmhveestse pohe ese fo. Ewre riopvdme dan vytsal ortwe msloat a ncsei i epdcexneire a2y-er2ol-d emtis vife has ni emso ubt lfei hanesgc eneismm rtfsi owhtgr my 'vei lffiiutdc sa letret srya;e ym mtlsyo. Yufnn hghuott neno and dan lmtsoa way lpay hwo trsdoneiicp ts'i ym wtenda i it toseh cmea ot of elfi !()ewwh tuo out eon nlap olwud tuer. .

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