A letter from June 21st, 2018

Time Travelled — almost 3 years

Peaceful right?

Dear FutureMe, So, right now, I'm sitting in Josh and I's shared bedroom in his mom's house. I just finished my first reflection journal for the first 50 hours of my practicum at SVC. I concluded this reflection by saying that I don't want to work in campus life. So, I guess that's something. I'm broke as fuck, in so much debt I could cry, and I'm not in the best physical shape. But I also have a family I love, a wonderful man by my side, and friends that mean the world to me. So, life's not bad. Sometimes I think back to when I was like 13 or 14-- did I envision my life as it is now? I'm so fucking proud of myself for the things I've overcome-- I have a college degree, I'm halfway through grad school, and i finally have a reliable mode of transport. I think little teenage me would be pretty amazed at where I am now. So, who knows where I'll be in 3 years? Will I be close to an assistant director of residence life position? Will i even pursue residence life as my first job? There's still so much uncertainty in my life, but I'm not scared of it. So, in three years from now, I'll basically be old. Just kidding. But I'll be closer to thirty. Which is when I said I'd want kids. How will I feel in three years? Will I have a better idea of whether or not I actually want to have children? I think I chose thirty because by that time I should know what the hell I want in life, right? I'll be more stable financially I hope, and I'll be ready to decide if I want to have a child. Who knows. I'm only 22 right now, not yet 23. On another note, I realllllly don't care about any more of my birthdays. Maybe 25 because car insurance or whatever. I guess I'm a little scared of aging-- It means losing touch with youth, getting more wrinkles, and physical deterioration. But even when I get this letter I'll still be in my twenties so maybe I should stop being so morbid. Okay, I'm seriously getting annoyed by myself, so I'll wrap this letter up. I guess this will be a neat little surprise in my inbox three years from now. Maybe I can do this again after I receive this one. PS thanks Pantsuit Politics for telling me about this. Hopefully your podcast is still going strong in 3 years. Or, ideally, Beth and Sarah will be running the country in some capacity. FUCK Donald Trump. okaythanksbyeeeee

Epilogue

about 1 year later

It's kind of a weird feeling to read this as a 26-almost-27-year old. I've been through so many changes in almost five years that I view my 22-year old self...

I od vief a as os w!no ot esayr + eanvï mipnaced htta wlil uoy usges loagbl. .
.
Sreatethwe cohsol ghhi eognlr i se:oirpl my ma no hiwt hsoj. I of pu lyialfn vhea bset lcduo ihchw our fo nitrlsohaipe salt dne the i deecdid ciidseon de-am- ddeen ni datregua eyra to us osoch,l orf ohtb enibg my. Orf ent'wre ew ahuypnp rgtotehe tujs chae reew ibdenrcyil and we erhot rtigh. N'vahet btu ohep i to him in own i ellw eopnsk rehte dnogi yaers 'hse. .
.
And na tapr ta ot was i maregan fedrn;i i best lspeoir rmeaird seayr i'm mnesooe efrbeo my eh met ii: nehw tlaulyca aws onw intren a amtalwr. Nda ncenderetco wtlra"?ma on __"_ him i ritfs aws csscali nigtda morf saegsemd we a pap teh inthg. Pu ym dendwgi laos wsvo atth erspah a dende in. .
.
Am finish ochsol ot uot i fo ym bouat obj yrea adgutrae 3 !!(!) rifst of. 'mi lsilt ttah caft eht si a to rtyleecn aiesr decetapc eranhto iciitnangfs crsspoe pya gitynr taht i iospiton. .
.
Naenhgpip pu tkahn ddi l;ife utghoht taht dowul haah i dne i tcaf hte otn ta pu in thta rcednseei edgosnos den. .
.
Yaw meit yan yhea, 'esehrt on nvigha oh lhle in sono im' ksid. Veha i hits dnoe ?oome!ycn sit' ni dna one do fi a cli,dh. .
.
Wsa uobta noe tgirh erca tasp mrnoaye :htign srybihtad ubota me i lso,a t'dno my. I ouatb fhal to dlo haev i het miet woh nitkh am. .
.
Oyrwr has fo si eacmreb ti hsti tyginr nhertao part tlsil tbu outab em g,gnia em of to rpat. Efil i hcihw for aeg somiwd ayd nad ma trgufeal verye cperneeeix wiht smeoc. Ttah i htoesr hitw gudreltgs a buato atwh nlemiseym nowam caer ciwhh as am em ansttgir ot i i uogreny khnit ietonc fo elss. Era paitnte rctene tlliet fi oyu adn veents i to em tills at ot wlli orme elt go einttap usck srgein" lfie ibneg ;tib sonl"oe a hacgetin ubt be eht. .
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See hseetlsemv nac satrp edar ihts htta of tosrhe itsh dna opeh i in. ;eyasr denecirepxe 'vei smeo btu sytvla mstoal insemem ni erotw fultcdfii flei ghcnase sicen oytsml ahs o--2el2ardy i torwhg prevodim ertlte etmis fvei my sa a irfst ym ewer and. Nyfun hsoet ym napl pnridocetsi uthtohg neon uowdl nad eon ypal it's i out otu caem yaw ot dawnte (ew)w!h how feil ti true of sltoam nda. .

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