A letter from June 21st, 2018

Time Travelled — almost 3 years

Peaceful right?

Dear FutureMe, So, right now, I'm sitting in Josh and I's shared bedroom in his mom's house. I just finished my first reflection journal for the first 50 hours of my practicum at SVC. I concluded this reflection by saying that I don't want to work in campus life. So, I guess that's something. I'm broke as fuck, in so much debt I could cry, and I'm not in the best physical shape. But I also have a family I love, a wonderful man by my side, and friends that mean the world to me. So, life's not bad. Sometimes I think back to when I was like 13 or 14-- did I envision my life as it is now? I'm so fucking proud of myself for the things I've overcome-- I have a college degree, I'm halfway through grad school, and i finally have a reliable mode of transport. I think little teenage me would be pretty amazed at where I am now. So, who knows where I'll be in 3 years? Will I be close to an assistant director of residence life position? Will i even pursue residence life as my first job? There's still so much uncertainty in my life, but I'm not scared of it. So, in three years from now, I'll basically be old. Just kidding. But I'll be closer to thirty. Which is when I said I'd want kids. How will I feel in three years? Will I have a better idea of whether or not I actually want to have children? I think I chose thirty because by that time I should know what the hell I want in life, right? I'll be more stable financially I hope, and I'll be ready to decide if I want to have a child. Who knows. I'm only 22 right now, not yet 23. On another note, I realllllly don't care about any more of my birthdays. Maybe 25 because car insurance or whatever. I guess I'm a little scared of aging-- It means losing touch with youth, getting more wrinkles, and physical deterioration. But even when I get this letter I'll still be in my twenties so maybe I should stop being so morbid. Okay, I'm seriously getting annoyed by myself, so I'll wrap this letter up. I guess this will be a neat little surprise in my inbox three years from now. Maybe I can do this again after I receive this one. PS thanks Pantsuit Politics for telling me about this. Hopefully your podcast is still going strong in 3 years. Or, ideally, Beth and Sarah will be running the country in some capacity. FUCK Donald Trump. okaythanksbyeeeee

Epilogue

about 1 year later

It's kind of a weird feeling to read this as a 26-almost-27-year old. I've been through so many changes in almost five years that I view my 22-year old self...

Do own! as + wlil thta i ïvaen efiv eamincpd uoy ugsse allbog to so ysrae a. .
.
Ghih oclosh hitw sojh nlegro my on awtehester am i rsileo:p. Fo su i yinlafl tesb ni iwchh m-de-a gardtuae for idcddee our iecsnoid htob rtiinpashleo vahe pu doluc ot oo,shcl i ned tsal ended my ignbe of teh ayre. Et'nrew haec etgeohtr rof dan rtghi juts ew oerht pnyhapu bdcinyerli rwee ew. I oidng won aesyr i snkepo to well esh' tbu reeht ni ihm 'tnehva hpeo. .
.
Artp to erebfo sbte wno dfnire; ta tme nad wsa rsaey einnrt i i tmwalra egraamn ardeirm ltyucala ewnh eh my ii: enoeosm a swa mi' osrliep an. ?mlrwa"at i we hgitn stfri a lciscsa eht mrof idntag swa on ppa ecdtnoceren dna mih "___ dgssmeae. Svow salo ddnee in saprhe gdwiend ym pu ttha a. .
.
Am uot i fo ym loshoc (!!!) irtfs boj arye of to uabot iifnsh 3 reautdga. Im' ltils ot si serai nrigyt a ttha apy i het oistpion dteepcca eltrncye isfntiincga oscsrep hreaont atth ftac. .
.
Fei;l teh ni tacf not taht hatt i aahh nkhta gihepnanp i ta uthhogt dne rieecdsen idd den up esosgodn wluod up. .
.
Meti yh,ea ellh er'seht ayw no hingav oons oh any in ksdi im'. Iths m!?oonyce dna a one haev od if lcdih, i 'its ni edno. .
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Em i obtau enayorm ym 'tndo rhysbdtia asw satp erca grthi ubtoa ghint: eon aol,s. Ma khint boatu ahlf eth itme lod haev i to i woh. .
.
Is iths to em oryrw atrp ti me batou ahs isllt tarp beaecrm fo utb ateohrn fo ,ggian yrignt. Arutglfe ma day fro cxerpeieen soiwdm aeg feil whcih nad eveyr i ihtw eoscm. Trheos i of me i ssle ihtkn gryeonu crae sa ot wiht meliysmne glrtsdeug am a monwa etoicn i oubat htat chwhi tahw asgrttin. Ielf be ettnpia teh uoy nceert nepaitt go gens"ir gebni i lsitl dna lte einacgth ta a ;itb me roem rae ot will if nvetse ubt to suck onsl"oe ettlil. .
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Eotrhs htat ese isht dna cna shit i in of rdea phoe ptsar etslsvheem. Woret lotams insce simte yvstal crdexnipeee cuifdfilt s;yrea sa i my a file eghancs elrtte a2oyder-l2- thrgow smieemn strif has 'ive vemidorp erwe ubt ifev mose otmyls dan in my. Eurt ayw dawent dan i fo hwo enon ()!wehw ghutoth out ethos adn paly uot apln ocdenirpist ym duwol to stlmao ist' elif oen came it nnfyu. .

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