A letter from June 21st, 2018

Peaceful right?

Dear FutureMe, So, right now, I'm sitting in Josh and I's shared bedroom in his mom's house. I just finished my first reflection journal for the first 50 hours of my practicum at SVC. I concluded this reflection by saying that I don't want to work in campus life. So, I guess that's something. I'm broke as fuck, in so much debt I could cry, and I'm not in the best physical shape. But I also have a family I love, a wonderful man by my side, and friends that mean the world to me. So, life's not bad. Sometimes I think back to when I was like 13 or 14-- did I envision my life as it is now? I'm so fucking proud of myself for the things I've overcome-- I have a college degree, I'm halfway through grad school, and i finally have a reliable mode of transport. I think little teenage me would be pretty amazed at where I am now. So, who knows where I'll be in 3 years? Will I be close to an assistant director of residence life position? Will i even pursue residence life as my first job? There's still so much uncertainty in my life, but I'm not scared of it. So, in three years from now, I'll basically be old. Just kidding. But I'll be closer to thirty. Which is when I said I'd want kids. How will I feel in three years? Will I have a better idea of whether or not I actually want to have children? I think I chose thirty because by that time I should know what the hell I want in life, right? I'll be more stable financially I hope, and I'll be ready to decide if I want to have a child. Who knows. I'm only 22 right now, not yet 23. On another note, I realllllly don't care about any more of my birthdays. Maybe 25 because car insurance or whatever. I guess I'm a little scared of aging-- It means losing touch with youth, getting more wrinkles, and physical deterioration. But even when I get this letter I'll still be in my twenties so maybe I should stop being so morbid. Okay, I'm seriously getting annoyed by myself, so I'll wrap this letter up. I guess this will be a neat little surprise in my inbox three years from now. Maybe I can do this again after I receive this one. PS thanks Pantsuit Politics for telling me about this. Hopefully your podcast is still going strong in 3 years. Or, ideally, Beth and Sarah will be running the country in some capacity. FUCK Donald Trump. okaythanksbyeeeee

Epilogue

about 1 year later

It's kind of a weird feeling to read this as a 26-almost-27-year old. I've been through so many changes in almost five years that I view my 22-year old self...

To seugs od as i a tath lwil so dimnpcae boglal oyu w!no ievf + rseay aveïn. .
.
:ilsopre gonerl sewtheeart olsoch twhi ghhi no hsoj i my am. Su het ym i odclu cdddeie taagdeur elsantirphio ot for rou osiniced in i ohbt hocs,ol tlas ainllyf fo bieng fo d-a-me tbse dne eahv wichh raey up dende. Nyaphup oethr ew 'erentw ehac tusj we grhit ncridyleib eerw orf nad tgtrheeo. Ihm in i nodig a'hnvet ot eyars elwl now hs'e erhte utb heop i konsep. .
.
Nosomee an aredrmi ngmraae at :ii eoliprs tulyacla 'mi mte he asw tapr hwen nad a won i ief;rnd orefbe asw ym rwtlama sreya tseb itenrn ot i. Gtinda ew het ___" ntceecrnode taam"?rlw from saw app on nad gnith rtsfi segdeasm a him i lsiccas. Up hatt aols dndee edngwdi pearsh ym ni a swov. .
.
Am fihnis boj tuo solhoc of raeautgd i my ritsf uabot !(!)! to 3 of ryae. Ttah nyecrelt a eth seopcsr rytgni esiar apy to hatt noispoit 'mi llist aiticnsifng rotnhea si ctaf eepactcd i. .
.
Ahha ricdsneee ta pu innpaghep i owuld eth akhnt up htat gotuhht end otn i in ctaf ile;f thta gsnsdeoo did end. .
.
Ho no yaw nay etim ah,ye hlle oons having hees'tr dkis mi' ni. Endo eon iths 'tsi a vhae do ni adn fi i h,icdl y!mnoce?o. .
.
Psat rithg swa reca me ynmorae butoa 'otnd one tahisdbyr tinh:g botua i l,osa my. I to aevh old teh oatub i am etmi fhla ntikh woh. .
.
Me stlil fo tngiry ahs tubao utb onarhet of em ecmbera arpt rtap ti wrryo si to ngiga, sthi. Feli wthi ma yad eprexicnee ruetfalg eeyrv gea owsmdi nda ecsom i hhcwi for. Omawn with to sa care gruyeno i ntikh ma simmeeynl grsttian i wichh atth fo iconet sles ggtdrsleu htrose tubao a me whta i. Etiltl lte eenrtc em og aer i eb to nad ltisl einbg svetne pttaeni inrsg"e i;bt nolsoe" if lliw ta eancgthi het eatpnti flei erom oyu ckus a ubt ot. .
.
Sthi hatt ni i phoe ratps ese eelhsmsvet cna hosert thsi arde of adn. Ltmsoa ehngsac yatvsl lfei frsti owtre iencs pecedenxrie o2-e-d2arly pvreimod terelt a yas;er tifcdlufi hsa ni my five v'ei htwgor symtol were sa adn emtsi msoe ym mniesme i but. Alpn wdluo my we!h)(w uot dotieisrncp dan etru hsoet to taosml uynnf neno wya ohw i layp adwtne mcae ti uto utogthh neo ilfe of 'tsi dna. .

This user has written an update to this letter.To see what they wrote, please

Press ← and → on your keyboard to move between letters

Write new comment

Load more comments