A letter from Dad from April 21st, 2015

Dear FutureCJ, My wish for you is that you know what is right and pursue what is enjoyable and honorable in your life. Often at your age now that means playing sports, and often in the pursuit of trying to be the best at a sport, a person can lose the focus of the kind of person who they are. You will hear many examples about athletes (BTW, that's a 2-syllable word, not 3 as is sometimes mispronounced "ath-a-lete") who make bad choices and wind up paying heavy costs for their bad decisions. It's my lifelong job to help steer and teach you how to be the kind of man others want to be like. Here is such a story. I'd be very happy if you were the kind of person who did what the boys did in this story. In this recent story some players saw something wrong - bullying - that was going on, and stopped their own game (after all, it IS just a game) to stop someone from bullying a girl with Down's syndrome, who is developmentally delayed, or a special needs kids. This is the kind of person I expect you to be. This kind of act is seemingly "above and beyond" the normal behavior of people, but I have great, great, GREAT hopes that you will be this kind of person always, as a normal act of living, and not for any notoriety it might bring you - because of the quality person you are inside. That, Calvin my dearest boy whom I love so far and wide, is much more valuable than the Calvin who does well at sports or school or art. Players leave court mid-game to confront bully of cheerleader with Down syndrome *********************** A group of middle school basketball players walked off the court in the middle of a game when they heard bullying coming from the stands directed at cheerleader, Desiree Andrews, who has Down syndrome. "We walked off the court and went to the bullies and told them to stop because that's not right to be mean to another person," said Miles Rodriguez, one of the players, told Fox & Friends Friday. The athletic director at Lincoln Middle School in Wisconsin told the show he was proud of the boys for what they did, as well as Desiree and the other cheerleaders. "It truly does take a village to do great things," AD Tim Nieman said. Brandon Morris, who was the boys seventh-grade coach at Lincoln told the Kenosha News, "One of the kids stepped up and said, ‘Don’t mess with her,’. Eighth-graders Miles, Chase Vasquez and Scooter Terrien stormed off the court to confront the bully, who was giving Andrews a hard time. “We were mad; we didn’t like that,” Rodriguez told the paper. “We asked our sports director to talk to the people and tell them not to make fun of her.” In a video on TMJ4 news in Wisconsin, Andrews called the gesture “sweet, kind, awesome, amazing.” “It’s not fair when other people get treated wrong because we’re all the same. We’re all created the same,” Terrien told TMJ4. In a tradition that began last year, the introduction of the starting lineup for Lincoln’s boys basketball team always includes Desiree, coach David Tolefree told Kenosha News. He added that the gym was renamed “D’s House” in her honor, and students wear T-Shirts celebrating her inclusion with the team. “They have really stepped up, almost like they are big brothers to her,” Tolefree said. “It’s good to see.” Desiree’s father Cliff Andrews told the paper that his daughter’s interest in cheerleading came from the television show “Glee”. “They have a character with Down syndrome who is a cheerleader. And she said, ‘If she can be a cheerleader, I can be a cheerleader.’” Cheer coach and Lincoln teacher, Laura Stone, told Kenosha News she believes Desiree’s participation on the team, and at school, has helped her students grow. “She has been very special to us,” Stone said. ************* ************* ************* P.S. Today was "just another day", but when I went to wake you up because you get all agitated when I leave without hugging and smooching you goodbye, I wrapped you up like a bug in a rug, and you were all smiles. We all had a good morning. You got out of bed to give me more hugs & smooches before I left for work, and then you, Mom & Genevieve waved bye-bye from our living room window to me as I drove onto Hickman Rd. on my way to work. Waving farewell to you like that alights my heart and gives me a great feeling. I hope you understand this feeling when you also, may God will it to be so, become a father yourself. Then over my lunch I came home in our van "Devaney" to pick you all up so we could go get my '99 Jeep from our great mechanics, Ultimate Automotive, her in Des Moines. You enjoyed riding in my Jeep on the way back to home, but not before you climbed around the shell of a mustang that had no doors, engine or seats and was placed right next to where my Jeep was sitting. You had fun playing with the steering wheel and climbing in & out f it, though it had mostly rusted our flooring. Then, you & I drove in my Jeep back home and we all played outside, with you using a wide broom and riding your gator/green pick-up truck while we also watched & played with Genevieve. I loved being with you all & I imagined playing the Lottery and winning a gob of millions so we could do that everyday, but that's not real life. Real life is working hard & steady, enjoying what you do, and appreciating the times you can spend with your loved ones. I appreciated the experience I had on my long lunch today, to play with you & G and talk and hug Mom and talk about things. You picked the dandelions form our yard and put them in your blue bucket. They sure were bright and you saw the beauty in what adults pretty much always see as weeds. I can see the beauty in your spirit and personality, and I hope you will continue through all of life's unexpected burdens now and ahead of you, to be the man who loves life and sees the beauty in the everyday things. Love in and with Jesus Christ, ~Your loving Dad