Thanksgiving

Hey Junior Year Me, So it's Thanksgiving again and I wonder what you're up to. This year's Thanksgiving was very, extremely different. You know that the holidays are always really strange for me anyways, it seems it's especially strange now that I am adult, more than when I was a kid. It's like I can't quite get the rotation of parents and relatives just right. I always seem to spend the least amount of time with my dad and the maximum amount with my mom. I guess it's because I know that if I'm with my mom I won't have to listen to her complain about how miserable her life is. Anyways, life just keeps complicating things. This year especially was completely different from the past years. My pop-pop has been in the hospital and this is the first Thanksgiving in a long time that there hasn't been a dinner. Instead my mom-mom spent it in the hospital with my pop-pop. I went straight home from the bus station on Thanksgiving morning to help my mom with dinner. I had to close the night before and so I couldn't leave the city early. Usually my dad's side of the family has something going on, but even this year they didn't. I was expecting to be able to cover all my bases in one day and then spend the rest of the weekend catching up with friends, but it just didn't happen that way. I'm typing this letter to you from my mom-mom's house. I spent the night here after my dad dropped me off. I got to spend a few hours with him, and Debb, and Noa. I didn't get a chance to see Maddy, but I"ll try to squeeze in a visit before I go back up to New York for New Years. The house has this heavy air about it. Usually I'm here and the air feels light and happy. I'm reminded of my childhood memories and it's just pleasant. But right now it's eery. Everything has this sort of quiet to it, like everything is holding it's breath. There is this emptiness, the abandoned his and hers mugs, the empty refrigerator. I keep looking in the refrigerator looking for some evidence that my mom-mom has been making meals for herself, but there's nothing. It's like everything is on pause until he comes back, and I realize that that's what it's like to really love someone. Every morning my mom-mom wakes up and goes to the hospital to bathe my pop-pop. She spends most of her days by his side, helping him to eat, and drink, cleaning up his messes and being encouraging to him. It takes a lot out of her, yet she keeps going back. Every day without fail, she's there by his side. She counts the days and hours until he can come back and curses every second that keeps them apart. That's love. Real love, not a sick love that is dependent. It's more like they had a system, a state of homeostasis that won't resume until he returns to her side, and that's love. I hope that this letter finds you well. I hope that my pop-pop is feeling better and that your Thanksgiving has resumed some aspect of normalcy. I hope that your Junior year of college is going well. I hope that you're excelling and succeeding. I can't say for sure what your year is going to be like. I'm at that point in my life where I can't really see what's in front of me and I don't know how my year will unfold. There's this internship program that I really want to do, so we'll see how that goes! Can you believe that the first semester of your Junior year is almost over? That you've made your schedule for the spring semester of Junior year? That your Junior year is almost over? Crazy! Right?! Enjoy it! I know you will! I don't know what you have planned, but continue to enjoy your year girl! You deserve it! Oh! Also you should definitely do a length check on your hair! Here are the last measurements: November 28, 2014 Back right: 4.5 in Back left: 5in Back middle: 5in Middle left: 4.5 in Middle right: 4.5 in Front: 5in Front left: 4.5 in Front right: 4.5 in Alright! Have a great rest of the year! Love, Past self!