A letter from Jan 18, 2023

Peaceful right?

Hey my cherished future self, Mwah mwah it’s ur past self, how you’ve been? What r u up to now? What kind of adventures are you doing right now? I wish you nothing but the best. As of right now, I’m struggling through several day long stomach ache with a hard lesson not to abuse my stomach and be careful with what I eat on daily basis. It’s snowing…AGAIN. Winter back at our old home on the mountain is nothing like winter in midwest. I’m slowly going crazy in this place but at least, I’m warm, having roof over my head, and internet access. So, small victories for that. My savings has taken a huge hit after we moved here, I’m sure you’ve found job and is job jumping like usual. But I got to ask you if you managed to get car this year? Or at least getting closer to that goal? I still want car so badly even tho insurance and maintenance are a thing. I want my freedom. How about training and doing some Marathon, and working out in swimming pool? I want to do that, but with ***** going on, it seem difficult but I’m slowly getting there…slowly. I don’t know what I expected when I moved here, but it’s nothing like I’ve expected, this state is kind of boring, but hey, at least we got this year and onward to work on ourselves and figure out how to best improve ourselves and get our future set and in order. I know one thing for sure. Progress will be made in 2023. We will be better off financially at end of year, better off spiritually and emotionally, we will be more aware, and crush our shadow selves. It’ve been tough and rough. But I’m slowly taking it one day and step at time. Hopefully by end of year we have better progress on our writings to show for it. In the beginning of 2022, I have zero idea what to expect from future. And in the beginning of 2023, I have some ideas and desires, and hopes. Especially regarding writing, homesteading, and traveling (No idea if this year has travels in store for me, but I’m always open to opportunities, now that I have license…) I hope by 2024, I’ll have a foundation built and working toward something. I want to be the most lovely version of myself by the time I meet her. But at same time, I’m in zero rush, now I know I have a long list of goals and wants that I want to achieve in this lifetime. Being single can be incredibly awesome at times. I’m sending you so much love and hopes. And I’m hundred…no thousand percent sure that you’ll effortlessly conquer 2023, regardless if it’s grand and obvious, or simple and steady progress and before you know it, it’s over with. Go forth into 2024, my beloved, Go forth with my will, faith and determination, we got this ****. Always. We’ll make it. From your past self, 23

Epilogue

about 24 hours later

Hello, my dear past self!

I know you had some aspirations and hopes for 2023 but you weren't sure what you're in for, but let me tell you how incredible...

2302 to us was. . . Sa mose llwe hsare etsmsruiofn stmu tihw i. .
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Cryaz alet cmhotas eikl i kcyuill ew ehca one of raey we orf tdd'ni ni uessis pxeetc hte memrbere 0223 taoscndiept hatt hsaocmt uro het atth tnah erwe miet ohert srte asulu ll,we ahev veyr. .
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Nad in ot some erew did eehrt evha my 'evi nad i gtinae enbe ai,nerl retbet el,lw as ate tno moes tea but adys haitsb ydsa erhew t'si i lw,le erewh uittpng 'itdnd remdvipo teehrlhai etffro. .
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Rgonw saw i gseultrgd kgownin twhi ireotneagv ot fo aols this nstw'a drifgeu itwh ew tuo ttah laelb us ot rteaf enthgsomi ithgn ayesr utiln ,idsoderr sluiempcov eabl upt yare sith a btu. Si ton dna dan e'ewr na,gia modeprvi gthturouoh eiht,re tilun ialnadtodi oarvete ofr fllu ve'we nlyo tshi i sdya utb fretcep slsuen ere'w lraeyr emossmtie endssc,o ro tae go a ygrnhu tihw tol tisll segposrr aknscs. Days ewrfe ot i,ltsl be tahn ti era fra hotes esud. .
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Royu t,ey srpkueoeehe htna a ,jbo naamizg browor to snavig uyro esva the rftae vhae even nda ubt surne hte no itpno ouy atth eve'w orf icsne cbinielred ntah as acr m'i si a emor mneagda ogt tipsirieor igupttn fro yaer btu loytmpecel noefyratnlutu to you, ti dogo acr, ptas u,yo dah form a i to aehv ni meoh isht ,sepkr swen ew ta sresti, easdi ddi arf uoy iegrgb a i dignanri wtih and a job. .
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Ferodg nosipr si ehratr iftsr yruo rmfo sutj that raetileb igpacsen tleanm eurfylso to rf,ee has in twhi vahe adn sone'td iychlspa ruyo sueebca aedh nath ot ealving cra amek mroeedf yuo cearv fmro ocme odmreef uyo oyu eht. Fedomre ysa pduor itsh 'weve adn chvdeeai i'm to ttha. .
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Ew dedne itdd'n itsh obelmrp pu ysayllphic heug ton a meit thiw ew vhea rof ew tihw ti og,t ojb su but ytsaed gebin aiecvt eonuhg leatouftnunyr isht os amoewse jbo scexreei to lyckilu. .
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Tuo 3202 su ouy your ,ozne 'idndt uritlonseo ewn to own in htat wiht ftone lret,et idd hucm, ozen we ew edaxdpne oru t,hat adn rlebocftaom of in tse rfo sthi tge that menitno teh atth uoy so yvre isthgn mftrooc are rtocofm. .
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Na 'reew at,ht nylifal noneli of pmcaagni iilcenbedr adgnmae eitm & onji that grnado tfrea weikleby udnoeng we msete nglo fo npcgaiam to ot nad do now intwnag ptar. .
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Gtglsure ta lceap, do aetsl rfcneh much tbu ew not ah,ir ot we wuittho rou isht istrf bidra ni ohw raenlt cna loesrsveu. .
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Rof we be erev dna ni nteiaispolrh ntoi yuo iniregfdrl oyu to iedzlare got fitsr atednw sbcuaee hduers keobr ouy tdnd'i ietm ,pu.
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Gronts tish( we oenhug rkedats is daecf aridaf ew nad rdow su nihgt fnesurfig of yuo lable sa tnshak is tno ,us hatt to the abed,su tshi eyht ew ahonrte twne rwee loev sreaub a atth its' difntleci hhuogt,r uervess,ol lla of aerildze it oto ykao noup ti the teh ezlrida,e odrw utamras of ttha in bnegi fednei eusbda ot is erwe ew ctpases uro fuowpelr ot. ).
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Evbar nrgiwti twroe eugonh to estopd ot meos dna legchlena uiwerfooracnovh meabec kssill aflylni ew casinff nad htem uro elcdrbinie. Meso rtneur in and srfnide gor eelncibrdi dgaeni. .
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Ouy ****** aehv sdfinre treag edus ot hiwt athw ni rfidens sotcinnnceo vonlig it anht enasm rreaht ot be nseotoddru oyu. .
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Pian ttha etwor ew nda rr,cadei etmh plheed esstaeeicrmp emso ot fo mchu so we hte crenoisd mstre oecm toyepr i us tihw. .
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Ot etmrs dnede woetr htat ,htme wtih dan oga, htwa by uoy ilflnay ribgunn clcye ot dappnehe the aemc fo 5 eyvr trlete uoy stih oyu you fnali orrw,so yaer of afrte epytor and oruy toyerp adn pnia rotwe m,eth het abuser aawy eerrfder ewneteb that rfsit ot. Yclce ibetafluu lcseo that ot a nilalfy acme hsa. .
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Tow of of njdoei tsrfi rouy ibg eisnz upcloe nda uyo selcots a wtih agnb aflyinl ruoy ot edfirns paiepdl amndof. .
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Uyo ew lyeforus nwe kool ueevslors ot sglssae no,w cumh smeo ihtrg wiht owh i pkin to lfee ohme enm,tino in owh gte hda ofudn onw 'mi fgetnrtoo ehcnac ylraen you nda uyo adn i thiw ovel rundousr a tocehls os klie shypall,yci ta we lefe ,in. .
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Em gworth t'acn nda reots wtai i ahs ni ofr 2420 ash ees fo eenb hsit deibcnerli ot atwh eayr. .
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Ihdbytra tmsu dei,d tog odsiaengd tbu iersts ,uoy enws as 0232 erh rrbaegahietnk ynaerl kerab i your etrpsen ithw ot acncer teh sa. Eb ubt hcin nto is stih so hsti erhe uor end, nstgro nwok i we ot uy,o draifa eegrvi ortuhhg iflyma eb cealgel,hn hte lwli hoegun isth ycr your ries giturpsnop ytdreag rhe iths erojyun uievrsv dna o'ntd auesbec no ot peek orf eh'ss illw liwl sith eb ehs adn gruho ot pu nda irthg. .
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Ilwl oiccndeenf os, ceribleidn ti of prssasu orfht i liwl atth who hlsal reya a oint fra ni tihw 0223 eb 2240 go ,0242. .
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Nwko gbrin ,fsel my ssebignsl spta vebdole yuro htat pu cnhi lwli oyu pkee aynm reihcsh adn for 3220 to oyu. .
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L,oev whti.
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Sfel tfrueu yrou.
23.

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