A letter from September 30th, 2015

Dear FutureMe, Bruce just left half an hour ago. He came ou d to visit last night about half 10. You stayed up talking until half 1 in the morning despite being knackered after working from 7am. When he showed up you both did this awkward hug thing outside. It felt wrong. You we're glad to see him but it felt strained. Once outside you sat on a couch each, avoiding being close. Talking about work related stuff for hours. You've been in love with this guy since 2013. Do you remember going out for Halloween together? Do you remember that first kiss? When he said afterwords "well that took long enough" because there had been a spark since 2012? You stayed the night at his and although nothing happened you see both happy. In the morning as you left he gave you a hug that felt like home, kissed you on the head and said he'd call once he was back from his holiday back home. However, after he got back all you got was a message saying he couldn't be with you because he was emigrating to Australia and he didn't want to break your heart. But he did break your heart, right there and then, and it's still broken because for a year, until he went away, you were both stuck in limbo. Wanting to be together but not allowing it to happen. You spent nights in eachothers beds just holding one another. In denial. You had arguments about it and fell out. Hurting each other every time. Every time you thought about seeing someone else he would cut in and stop it. Not wanting it to happen. You didn't even get to say goodbye when he left the country a you weren't talking. You only made up later via Facebook. Do you remember the first time he face timed you from Australia? You cried. Partly because of work stuff, mainly because of him. Youve tried dating other people, but it's not felt right. Every time you slept with someone else, you've thought of him. A month or so ago he told you he had a girlfriend. You felt your heart drop. He asked if you were seeing anyone as he always does and you had to answer with no. Again. Still alone. And then he came to visit in a hurry, just really to crash on your sofa. He had made plans to get lunch together today, however, after your both got up and dressed, he changed his mind, said he didn't have the time as he was off to see his cousin next. So he left. You watched him walk down the path, then o really to his car and off he drove. You stared in the mirror willing yourself to cry, but no tears came, so you wrote this email. And then you cried. This is the absolute tragedy of meeting the love of your life at he wrong time. Is is love purgatory. This is limbo. http://elitedaily.com/dating/love-purgatory/1044856/ I hope this visit allowed you some sort of closure. I hope you have moved on. I hope you have found someone else.