A letter from August 19th, 2016

Dear FutureMe, Hello, you loser how have you been? It's has been 10 years since i wrote you this letter and i really hope everything is alright. I wonder if you experienced all those things you were afraid of before like falling in love, dates, drinking, partying, letting your self go basically. Are you happy now? Satisfied? I hope you are, i really do. What did you study? Please don't say that you gave up your studies or something? Oh oh where do you live? Greece or Sweden? Did you keep contact with your childhood friends? Well i wouldn't call them ''childhood friends'' but since summer/teenager friends doesn't fit that well i think you can settle with that. Anastasia? the others? Do you even remember their names? Do you have a boyfriend? How many guys have you've been with? Are you fat? Do you work out? Do you still listen to that marvelous music you were listening when you were a sad depressed teenager?Did your anxiety get worse?i hope that it didn't. Ok, let's talk about me now. I've been doing well. Tullinge gymnasium starts on Monday and i'm so stressed out. This week, the first week of me being in Sweden is the worst. i feel alone, I AM alone. My only real friends are in Greece and surprisingly enough the fact that they feel the same way, that they're also alone doesn't make me feel any better. I wonder what happened to Nikoleta, is she successful in the sector she wanted to be. What happened with that crush you once had? Is he still around? Did you have a thing with him? Omg i hate that side of me, that girly hopeless romantic that i hide beneath my skin. I makes me feel vulnerable. I also wanted to say that i may not love my self now and i may not be that confident but i hope that that will change, that i'll learn to love my self like i learned to love others. I will end this letter with a quote of my currently favorite poet, Charles Bukowski. “being alone never felt right. sometimes it felt good, but it never felt right.” PS. please do me a favor and listen to the song ''Chasing cars'' by Snow patrol after you finished reading the letter. I would also love to get the answers to all the questions i asked send back to the past, but apparently you can't do that. Do you? Well if i think about it more, i think it's better if you don't send the answers, what i want to say is that if my life is going the way i want it to, that is to say great, do not send them, if not please find a way, i need a happy ending even if i have to make it myself.