A letter from August 11th, 2016

Hey, its your past self here. I'm sending this to you as a kind of check up. I want to make sure your life is in the right place and you have not forgotten the thoughts you are having tonight. Basically at the moment you are pretty upset with dad, and thats because you feel as though dad has not given you enough leash to give yourself the childhood you wanted. You may not remember but you always wanted a childhood you could look back on and be happy with. One that you could laugh at because of all the dumb stupid **** you did. Yet one that you could be proud of because of all the mature decisions you made that kept you out of stuff that could have changed your life for ever for the worse. Really all you want is to be able to look back and smile, and make others smile with the stories you have. I'm going to be 18 next year and although that still is young, I guess thats kind of a sign that your childhood is coming to an end. Things will eventually begin to change and although its sad, the things you wanted in your childhood might not be there when you read this. I'm just really sorry. Maybe i could have tried harder. I know the thing you wanted most of all was for dad to sit you down one evening and have a beer with you. Even though it does not seem like much you always wanted that to happen before you turned 18. I'm sorry but it really does not look like its going to be there for you. Know I want to get really serious with you for a bit. Sit the hell down and listen to yourself. You might be a father by now, but maybe not. Either way you need to remember this. DO NOT raise your kids the way dad raised you, don'd get me wrong, you love dad but there are some things you do not need to follow from him. I know you like to treat others the way you were treated but don't you bloody well dare do that to your kids. You are going to allow your kids the childhood you did not get. When each of your kids turn 16 you are going to take them out for their first drink. Not just one of them, each of them deserve that. Also you are going to have to trust them. If they have your blood then they are not going to be headless chickens, they will have their wits about them. So you have to trust their judgments. Let them be with their friends. Let them figure things out for themselves. Do not be an absolute fool and let them do whatever they want, because there is a heap of **** out there that can harm them. And lastly spend time with them, as much time as you can possibly spare. They are your children for heaven sake, so do not take them for nothing. Never lose yourself in work like dad does. So I'm sorry you did not get the childhood you really wanted. You only get one shot at life so I guess its just going to have to do. There is still time left so I'll make the most of it for you. At the moment you are working on going out with Luna. I've got her gift right here on my desk ready to give to her on Monday. It would be great if you could tell me if it'll work or not, and if you are still with her now. Then again this will contribute to your childhood wether it works or not. Anyways I'm off to bed, keep your life on track and do not **** everything up for yourself. You better still have dreadlocks, don't disappoint yourself. Night, remember what you said.