A letter from December 11th, 2015

Dear Future Self, As 18 year old you it's difficult because they don't teach you how to do good in life, you just go out into the world and try to do the best you can, but when you're depressed and just getting worse it can seem way more difficult and it can stress me out easily as you'd know. We worry about all the big things which is fine, but we REALLY focus on the small things and I hope you've gotten better at controlling that because while you love your mom infinitely, you know you don't wanna be like her. You've seen how that effects relationships and you have a good one with Hunter (Even though we fight a lot lately and have some issues to work out.) He's told you he hopes you guys get married and he wouldn't mind being a dad. You got a really good guy that wants to be there for all your successes and comfort you in your failures, don't **** this up because you over analyze everything and the long distance is hard for you right now. You better be fighting for this relationship to work. Next, I'm going to give an update of your current situation in case you don't remember anything because you have a ****** memory you really should get that checked some day it's probably from your head getting hit on all types of different things as a kid you clumsy ****. So I just finished my first term of College. You suck at writing, but hey you ****** that Psychology class tho you got an A, so I have faith in your future. Next term you'll be going full time and on top of that you, your mom, and Hunter (Your friend not bf) are all trying to find a place to live so we can get away from our grandparents. You have pretty bad depression and I hope you've fixed that by now. This isn't permanent so you'll be fine and should be fine now. Moving to Canada is going to be a process, which I can't even begin to explain because I suck and haven't been looking into it as much as I should WHICH I SHOULD DO NOW SINCE IT'S CHRISTMAS BREAK BUT I PROCRASTINATE I'M SORRY!!!! Anyway, as you're reading this you'd be around 28 I believe, a lot can happen in 10 years so I'm gonna ask a bunch of important questions you'll know the answer to: Are we married to Hunter yet? If not are you married at all you *****?! <.< Second, Kids? Did you or did you not and I swear if the answer is yes and more than 2 HOW DARE YOU RUIN MY BODY! But also congrats gurl. ARE YOU IN CANADA RIGHT NOW!?!? If so then THANK YOU FOR FOLLOWING YOUR DREAM! Did you get your Bachelors/Masters degree? As you can see I haven't decided which one I want to chase after yet. Luckily you'll know this as plenty of time has passed. Are you a Marriage and Family Counselor? If not then I hope it's something you really like and hopefully we didn't waste all these years for a degree just to be working a ****** *** job that's not even in our field. Because I'll be mad as **** at you.... me. To sum this all up, I'm proud of you, I'm sure you've done great because I believe in you and what you're doing and pursuing after. You've been through a lot, but you can't let that hold you down, I hope you haven't let it hold you down because you don't deserve that. And I love you. Love, Michaela (18)