feeling...

Peaceful right?

feeling... sharp. dangerous. full of attitude. which, I guess, is just what a girl about to go to college ought to feel like. When you, future Anna, get this, it'll be ten years from now, and the passport that you got today will have expired. How was going to school in another country? Was it far enough away from your parents? What prompted past-you to write this (besides the fact that the trusty sketchbook/journal has gone missing) is the fact that, among all of the suitcases you were looking for in the attic today, you also found a hefty dose of family history. History from 1840. A picture of the family goat. Hand drawn sketches of the cottage. Letters back and forth between two feuding families. One family claims its daughter was starved to death whilst visiting the other. The other family is outraged because of a false arrest upon an unfounded accusation of THEIR daughter being a member of a house of prostitution. All insults and accusations in flowery, minute, faint 1840's penmanship, of course. I don't even know what the point of this email is. I just think it's weird that on the eve of your departure to distance yourself from your family, just when you're feeling incredibly independent, the attic delivers. Now, past-you wants to stay connected, be Bess's great great great great granddaughter, add her own tale to the many family stories. Past-you wants to stay in the attic forever, reading the family history. But I guess that's why college is good. So you can get the hell out of that attic and this house and make your own history. Go on.

Epilogue

3 days later

Ten years ago, I was a senior in high school aching to go to college as far away from home as possible. I wanted to see other countries and make...

Won my srtioes. I adn eythrngvei ko leaev i ubt sa tied — letf aws mhoe hatt elft ot nvee ot ehpoful lnnadep i,t anuolmnemt. Efurtu wgisn em no pgneoni leki imoseghtn asw pu my roebfe. .
.
Reuuft waay who dwno nkwo idpwe yzrca wa?th cna uoy ssmeeoitm lsoec svile rou eth naa,gi ist’ can but and eb. Woh ubt ewll htoughr teh tah,t sthi videl oyaenn thta ardlene konsw nttirwe oga etprty eysar i 0220 ebfreo xis w,lel eatrf lteetr solnse ash hnmsto tne autbo was. Ondsagide ccraen saw my wtih i oterrhb — nda.
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Eehrt say, oenhug to maostl as’htt itrhg. Teh eb evenr eth hemco few ni gecloel uvaeytlnle ot tyclipa off pelh hetn ysare iwht mih oguhth tiwh ktinag otg enev i i end rc,xeepniee after nad a hsifndie. I gecolle eb elsf legoecl i lpicyta neev tny,ourc to og maek neeagy-oar-t to ttngeiand whiel ro eb aneohtr ldot htat my gle,eloc ro if vedsaatetd hpypa ogt rneve so,ermeim ni ’id. Smporuoha mseo i sosl nwo ubt rotberh my ho-lgoeleecp fo is hte of gtninoh cerpodma kwon that ossl hte ot.
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81 i person ta eray tlemecoylp smtomeies rmof ekil my and efle reh i a fsel tenfifred kool odl ckba. Of in lpaerlla ieiagnm srheemeow nthe tbu etmi vsreenui, rhe i eoiudts inxesitg a. Ngritiw ayaw rsatt elif dan eethr ni iths gte ot igttins abotu ’essh drlo,w tertel dna agnintw hatt hre. Knmgai ehs’s hte’rey ethn iesfnrd nad rangdwnei orf thoerteg ggoni dan aiklgtn erh adn het oolrf on ustj imcus dna glguaihn adn kcoioes nda tra, toerr’bhs and oatub ndow noti adn nttsiig rmo,o own swakl. File ookl etrnhorn roseimem abtou hldo og illw lilw ot agiknlt tnah oynl laendic tyhe hrigt no ot fo ,now thme the dan teh ees oneg eht eb ni taht it to oerm ndspiegn ont lengiraiz ltg,shi ery,as ohert will vaeh rotheetg noe tanw noe to kiel etn eno enon yad mrsatet mdasre ot yad hatw owh nad hatt iltkgan of htere’y utaob emti. Was he tesb drenif my.

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