Five years ago today...

Time Travelled — almost 5 years

Peaceful right?

Dear FutureMe, Sitting in the study of my house in Liberty St, i feel compelled to throw a few questions into the deep dark abyss. It can't hurt i guess... I don't really know what i wanted to say in this letter, but hopefully it will bring a smile to your face. Currently you're with Steve, living the two of you in your 3 bedroom terrace together. You're happy most of the time, but you both have your moments. Occasionally you consider getting married, but the moment always passes. Perhaps next year in Amster*** you will raise the subject - you already know how he feels. If you're not with Steve any more, then i hope you have found forgiveness, either for him or for yourself. You've recently decided to get fit and healthy again. Eating 5 small meals per day is a good idea, so is walking the 50 minute home everyday. Hopefully you've stuck to your commitment, and are now happy with yourself and how you look. I imagine by now that you will have started your Masters. Keep at it, and you'll be finished before long. Your undergrad degrees weren't that hard, so you'll make it. You just have to believe in yourself. You're also job hunting - trying to find a more definite career path for yourself. This too will require patience and timing. Get over the Premier's job, if you haven't already. You can't win them all. Whatever you're doing now, make sure that you enjoy it. Make it a pleasure and your life will be richer. Jordan has just finished his first year of school, and Oliver his first of preschool. Hopefully they are healthy happy young boys now, intelligent and kind. Tell them that you love them. you should say that to Dad and Angela as well, and Gma and Gpa. Where would you be without these people? Love and honour your friends. Stand by them through thick and thin. They love you, don't forget that. If you feel your Spanish and French are slipping, then do something about it. Languages are amazing skills to have. Forget about your mother. If she wants to live her secluded life of misery, then there is nothing you can do to help her. When she comes back to you, then you can work out what is wrong and help her, but until that time remember that she does not want you in her life. Remember the 27/08/2007. And finally, i'll leave you with your favourite quote: If you can fix a problem, then you don't need to worry about it. If you can't then worrying won't fix it anyway! Live a long and happy life. With much affection. D

Epilogue

6 days later

Dear me,

Wow, five years ago somethings were very different, and yet some were still the same. It seems strange to think that i thought i was happy, when in...

Sex yaeltir i wsa otn me reven htewhre i etves aws nhivag weihl suer htwi telsp ro. Amse evah even i gtothhu bene of ttase i ntiknihg naelid a ta aoutb usmt ttha tehrienvgy ubt gsbinr syee asw the ni eitm ti uchs ,ti stera segus i fnei ym ot.
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Rpepor otw nbee senic imte rbeko lcteearorlsro me hitw tath nda a i pu nmhtos sha ,tpee fro tryetp enbe 'sti uhmc. A fo tlo ehat syda i mh,i i htis mih - on dna i feel sims atht ielk imss i. Tisnitg owlrd to eovl to me neve ddeclu vene ahve hatt ,sthi - gnitfgetor asrm shi part pu niieds wloud just fo eht eerh tnipgy sxstei. Tnsdeo' i onde stpo me ti that i wkon tbu os tihng het ormf veah enlfige by uoatb agnliev ti mhi, sad tgihr. - i i igfenel lnoyle taeh ielk hist flee. Ceaps neo meit wnhe nhkti hatt soem ubt lfilayn the tusedlio dan ot letf h,slmfeet o'dtn i ot hatw tisfr neo at or od won slefe nwok i tjus etgs. Of enve loepep eaid utbt awy raysc dan tgdnai atth on eigmtne eh rtseadt timaigntiidn wess,etib nggoi is 'ive a tib. 'im sloa afraid lbrnvecgn/aiosuliot fo nsrtapieiolh heornat eylmfs gtigtne iont. Ot bieng a si htat work ot nhgit wdluo lpau aboylbrp of loaear,snbe i houghrt ubt het noesd't onw taht shtee ti the kown i utb post rcesoind corppest ttha csary ussesi, lsislk yas heva. I elfe hamrset me tiggnte i mose eb,bias hvangi ddomgeadn opeple dna see ni f,lie ehlwe ekli i am sutkc niligv uandro iemra,dr. Deen fndi cbak ilwl to lalf i nthki ngeniam a to wseorihte i attse tmhgsneoi eisvseepdr feil uporse,p my i vgei toin dna.
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Eb lwil i peih ko eynghretvi. Sreu eb mi' will it. In olt i heva iworgkn foavur a my. Ujst teh htiw i woh it opce elplrloyow/ hwo atpr lefe, ehpas i wdoul this i lwdou nda aeeetustdrmndi sgeus creoryev fo. Ttsra igana si lla cerisneigx nad ti rcy anc tuo i do. Teh otmtvoniia it ot do radh fdni to it's. I i ot do mseo of aalwsy the btu eteymierv try ti tnsenintio indf heav tebs i tno oerasn. Rgniid ekwe illw llwi wfe i oodg rof i epr to a nikht eb em owrk setim attsr - plofyuleh ahtt. Oogd eicdofnecn stefsni ym nad ofr my. Iarnt adys the dna i can alwk rteoh. Ghimt eecaphr eb aols it.
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Vnheeigry"t hte ont otn itnyrvgh"ëe ilwl tahri"lsgi seam iwll be the same" tsya as.

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