Dear Harley,
It's June 2026.
You're sitting at work, your left ovary is trying to commit war crimes, you're thinking about quitting O'Reilly's after 3.5 years, and tomorrow you have an interview.
Right now everything feels uncertain.
Maybe you've quit.
Maybe you're still there.
Maybe the interview went great.
Maybe it didn't.
What I want to know isn't whether everything worked out.
I want to know if you're proud of yourself.
Did you choose yourself for once?
Did you stop apologizing for being tired?
Did you remember that surviving isn't the same thing as living?
And most importantly:
Are you still writing?
Love,
Harley
P.S. How's the pain now? Please tell me the ovary calmed down.
Epilogue
about 1 month later
Dear Harley,
It's August 2026.
I completely forgot you wrote this.
Which feels like a very us way for this to start.
I suppose we should go in order.
You...
Tqiu dn'tdi ll'y'soeri.
Dysa eewr frate isittng tshree—ith dierf and e—ewavel ysad oterw ouy nlafyli you ggoin yusfoler ereht rhete nwdgeroin faret to tog fi oscheo.
Eoms aws ni uyo rethe iswh tlle i taht iuufebtal ucdlo onesls i. Rsoean a for a or endeed hgyeveitnr niveuers tath thta eth pu,hs epnaphs we nkwe.
Ot not ot ongig htat ouy do i'm.
Iugfnkc ceurl teh mssioetem si stju rneveisu.
Had teh dan atth yuo txen ady? reniteiwv.
The you bjo tdnd'i gte.
Btu htt'sa oyka.
Jbo uasbeec you trohnae frdfeeo ipotsnio a. It koot ouy.
Wno anargme alses yeo'ru pastr a.
Oto teh utabo of hwmoose and a itegtgn ned ridfe, ewek ttha epje ta'swn het eevn taref eaucsbe deid aosh,c eth.
Yes. Eehp.
I okwn.
Npcia utb 'odnt. Won ohdan ew avhe a oplit. Es'sh se'sh si reh orry enam r,de usor dan.
A inhtyegrve helwi irgitwn lepouc of ettrel iths ,eewks so sclyliaab eatlsb eddneiscro candhge uyo tnwhii.
Rkow ehgandc.
Car hte gcadneh.
Hancgde file.
Ewhhret otu n'tdid yuo ot know adsi gnvihtryee nwat oyu oekdrw.
Dasi ttha dgal im' yuo.
Out ntd'di wkro sbeeuca rihvgeytne n,o.
Know esle iomtngehs adnetw tbu oyu to.
Fo opdru flso?ruye ear yuo.
Eahy.
Tcauylla i ma.
Cfylrpete ehrtengivy suecaeb i ahedlnd not. 'indtd i.
Nrdag seuebca myelfs in mdhreac adn uot ton eommtn vrlebya ill'esry'o i shoec of oesm cincaeitm. That emnmto etg dntd'i i. Em ormf aayw that aws occeih aknet.
I got utb ahtw needaphp faewtardr ot choose.
Pu got kbac i.
Eth i bjo roeth otok.
Terso i nerdela a wen.
I ebcmae a amganre.
Iredfgu teh out oitsituan rac i.
Ggoin ,nwhe ddeiced orf hte ykl,rfan njeu wilhe ebta su ausotebl otu of ot i pkte a tsih.
Uoy ask: so hwne.
Oceosh lsyerfuo yuo ddi ofr ?once.
Kthin hte esy wrasen i si.
Nahepp nto in awy it usjt luwod eht hhutogt uyo.
Egdnin het ot egt sy'l'lroei eosoch i at td'nid.
Tfear cema cseoh i that it eht inignbnge.
Reitd yuo laso pestdpo if for nbieg pgnogaiizol i deksa.
On.
'im rroys.
One i'm irgkown listl that on.
Ertta lsilt mraol emmteioss 'tis elki a i ueshxtiano ligaifn. Smeeimsot i i od kwor eb sulhod ,emro rher,da albe peke tihnk wkaae ayst litsl gingo l,nogre to.
Rginyt denrik it 'im oautb to eb us tbu to.
Hent sdka:e oyu.
Sa ahtt si'nt singrvuvi uyo idd lig?nvi esam merrbeem tihng eth.
Tnkih to im' i ynliafl gtstiarn.
Me tjus pahpy ecaseub oden htye iev' eakm hnsgti.
Evi' ot depir ngeo. 'ive emvsio ot egon. Etl me byu lelitt inthsg uoliriucsd i've hety ebaecsu myeslf milse mkea. Im' spnla avhe engneylui i iedxcet tubao. Ycnlurrte rnepso nad dnik inlgimf gogni isitv hte to for eamg loahnimt a rmnaelto aebsceu aci,slotno ecigsonridn aer tanepylrpa eedtah t'htas wno 'mi iynflg rhamc ayrvirl fo ehyokc ot etxn ot nthe we.
K,sa shnea ew eovl laiy adn illst adn rfbeeo noutam an baolrusannee ouy ye,s.
T'ond emos nghcae ghitsn.
Em ngirbs rtptinaom eno to teh eaclld ouy tsom ietsnouq eht hhicw.
Llits rae ?trinigw uoy.
Sye.
Oot asnwer htta amlepocctdi is.
I nerwtti hmuc as i ihsw had as i vh'tnae. Radh neeb rteeh veah sha eershctts wiritgn eneb rweeh. Tnitsgi na lsilt danuor wgianit sabelolytu ear orf etreh fo mnreub esirsot pdtuis eihsfunind em.
Dtndi' tub aeelv eht oesstir.
I erteihn idd.
Ceetar lstil i. Nda i of tpu sdiine hmet sltil dinf efymsl icspee astarcerch. Me ttah hemt ihwt i ontw' paeapr egintmsoh evha ecsens ni ym ahde lvaee od elnoa i sitll niltu.
M'i a stlli rwrtei.
M'i uoy ltlis.
Torew uietnsoq tnhivgerey oyu aresnw hktin atrenhnude ta'tsh hte lutemiylta eht ot i adn.
No wrko ehnppa ta tnigsit tihw aedi ot yuo 2 on wree aws thaw btaou eunj. Uoy aws can,hge nwke going ot oklo but agcnhe awht ielk you ot dneede meihgotsn dnti'd onkw.
Tslil i hatw otdn' tenx wot hmsotn nhpepsa aerl,t wkno.
Ubt rthgi no?w.
Eehr m'i.
I'm idbnlugi wne ghoemnits.
Rofrwda 'mi figdnin ot to oolk shntgi.
Dsneiat of to eivl vvesrui ygrtni m'i yelrme.
Eylrah dna ae,yh.
Fo odpur 'mi su.
V,loe.
Eahrly.
P. S. Di,d clam ni evuaeynllt ctaf, eht ovrya ukfc hte dnwo. Ntahk oryu for yuo nnocrec.
P. P. S. On ss,oileyur eolucp aehv nxte to ncikguf eilk edia olko outab the fo oyu htwa kswee ear. Sorry in acevand. ❤️.
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