A letter from May 31, 2026

Dear FutureMe, Hey I haven’t done one of these in a while but I want to do a life update. It’s currently mid term 2 of year 11. I think this year is okay but with chino leaving it’s kind of sad. Xitong will be moving next week as well. I talk to Emma the most but I don’t think I’ll have a friendship with anyone like I did with chino. Anyways, remember April 2026? How Kira came and stayed for 2 weeks and I lost my virginity!! Haha crazy times. I miss Kira and I’ll be seeing him this July. But I’m not sure if we will last until December when I go to Japan—if I even go. I do hope I’ll marry him and he will change because I do love him dearly though. Anyways back to what’s been happening. Honestly life hasn’t been bad lately, well, I guess with all the stuff happening with Kira like how he talks to other girls yada yada but ugh it’s fine. I hate how I have to remind him to not talk to girls when I don’t even talk to boys in respect of him. He just likes the satisfaction of a girl interacting with him I guess. Also yesterday I talked to Akki. I know I probably shouldn’t but I haven’t talked to him since I blocked him in December but he messaged me on TikTok and I was like “wait are you akki?” And we started to catch up. I guess I still talked to him instead of immediately blocking him there because I am still mad how Kira talked to Kayla all this time. I showed Akki a screenshot of something Kira said to his friend about me and he translated it. He said stuff like “she’s not cute so she’ll be easy to ****.” Damnit it’s disgusting and I hate how it’s true. Nonetheless I still love him and wouldn’t want to change anything. Kira is my world but I feel like to him I’m just apart of his life. I don’t know but I don’t want to ever leave him so I will do my best at making him fall obsessed with me. I just hate how he always likes other girls. Am I just a *** drive for him? I’m not sure but whatever it is I love him and I want him to love me just as much. Also, after knowing what he said about me to his friends it makes me feel stupid when he says “hey cutie” or “you are the cutest in the world” because it’s not true. I hate how he lies and tries guilt tripping me to thinking I’m going crazy. I don’t know what to think. Anyways, whatever Kira does is better than Philip. I was reading an old email I did from this app and holy **** I was so obsessed with him. It’s so disgusting how vulnerable I was to Philip, knowing how he only wanted me when he was horny. Is that how Kira feels? The more I think of this the more I realise how all boys are the same. Sometimes I wish I was ***, lol, but I do love *****. Ugh I can’t think like this when I have a boyfriend I love. Anyways Ella I hope you are doing well. I tried sending this on my 16th birthday, so if you end up reading this at the time, happy birthday!! I love you so much and I hope everything is going your way. Please be safe and I hope reading this cured some boredom from you, haha. Please write more after reading this!!