A letter from Nov 29, 2025

I should grow up. Probably should get some sleep. I should eat less. I should be less awkward. I should read more. I should work harder and rest more and have more fun. And travel more. And make more connections and have closer friends. I should figure out what I want. I should find a boyfriend. I should re-read my journals and rewatch my videos and figure out what's wrong with me. I should be more honest with myself. I should stop trying to be cool. I wasn't ******* cool in high school. I'm not cool now. I'm cringe and what's more cringe is pretending not to be. I have bad music taste. I say the wrong things and upset people. I overthink. I'm a loser daughter. I'm just....different. I'm not ******* cool and I never will be. Instead of cultivating myself for other people I need to focus on what I am genuinely attracted to.