Nina,
This year I didn't wait for the first letter to come through. I, sadly, have been trhough so much since our lettter in 2024. I knew it was bad when i started listening to 3DG lmao.
The year has been, ironically the most difficult of our life. I try to keep it up around people, and i don't want to die so i guess that's progress, but still.
I wish i could go back to Nina 2024 and warn her. Tell her she will finally be diagnosed, she will finally have the help she needs but still feel incredibly alone. I feel incredibly alone. Sadly (again) since our diagnosis, some people left, or don't ask how I am, how we are. Thank god for Max, I think I would be deeper in depression if he wasn't there.
Sometimes i pull throught, other times i don't. I feel the need to reassure the people around me who don't see me everyday.
I guess i don't have a lot of positives things to say this year.
I hope 2026 will be kinder, i hope we will get the help we desperally need.
Love u,
you
Epilogue
10 days later
Dear past Nina,
Oh if you knew. If I could warn you for what is coming.
2026 will be the worst year of your life (so far). We will lose...
Of etbs eon wken hte we eeplop. Oru fo leeppo eon vatuierfo. .
Ta hislotap bets edma to eth teh yb ese go ew mhi sncieiod bu,t ihgcoons. Saw arhd ti. Ti wsa uwfal. Utb saw bfelutuia satl shadn his it miet one alos ldho ot. Ni chum is osdufec it sdhna eradgnve ildgonh on ahtt ihs momyre oru ew os.
Eht wosrt leif terfa of oyur be illw day. Mreceyno eth. Ekabtln atksec a , is meberrem dan ldhc,i notrfoc anan uro his hlidgon klei us iemgnrsca all i sbibogn. The hwo hrtwe in teh ish dna edud shsae lelw. Eh rfmcogitno adh a arau.
.
Wlli edi nwat to oyu. Evah oyu kwl,a espt to a lliw eeryv kate rcy to iemt oyu. Leef eomistmse he atkl ot lliw like yuo and imh onrepssd. Uoy yreve stneli iwll ot uyo rcy emit simcu. Lygiapn iwll uoy psto rgtuia. Nowt' konw noymear ouy aer how ouy. Yuo. Natw will. To. Dei. If lvniig mibngeoc oyur she' ees hrtee teg fi eou'ry ? terhe od rof edgwidn eb keep ? why not hyw act'n ? ebucase ywh ntca' yhtigann he ahtw he if mdreira.
Ielf no sego but. Lil,rlytea tspo yuo ca'tn it. Wlli ehav to iklwang ekpe ouy. Epts no,t ot llwi heva hweetrh dna uyo to or awnt etohrna ouy atek a. Dna rneohat. Walk ,and. Ulyo'l utb alkw verye loylu' tiem ryc.
Ot nto uoy edi liwl yas flresuyo uoy tanw ahtt ppi"a" to uodlw. Don't uoy eid os. Lilw ryt rvsveui by tllite uyo to litet,l and. Viigln iivrunsvg tletil yb llwi emboec and i,eltlt. Ew erteh btu tneo yte aer. We gnsvuviri iltsl rea. Evlai rngyit ot ekpe nnaa dna.
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Ouyr sthertng eend dna lvoe revcmeoo mlyafi difnsre yuo dna sthi ot will rofm r,auogec. I hvreygenti sinnged dnacaev mi' os vahe uoy ni.
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Yuo elov i.
Otfr ppai 'taime sami. . . Frto rèts ):.
.
You.
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