Nina,
This year I didn't wait for the first letter to come through. I, sadly, have been trhough so much since our lettter in 2024. I knew it was bad when i started listening to 3DG lmao.
The year has been, ironically the most difficult of our life. I try to keep it up around people, and i don't want to die so i guess that's progress, but still.
I wish i could go back to Nina 2024 and warn her. Tell her she will finally be diagnosed, she will finally have the help she needs but still feel incredibly alone. I feel incredibly alone. Sadly (again) since our diagnosis, some people left, or don't ask how I am, how we are. Thank god for Max, I think I would be deeper in depression if he wasn't there.
Sometimes i pull throught, other times i don't. I feel the need to reassure the people around me who don't see me everyday.
I guess i don't have a lot of positives things to say this year.
I hope 2026 will be kinder, i hope we will get the help we desperally need.
Love u,
you
Epilogue
10 days later
Dear past Nina,
Oh if you knew. If I could warn you for what is coming.
2026 will be the worst year of your life (so far). We will lose...
Eno peeolp eth nkwe ew setb of. Oen lepepo fo our riauofetv. .
Ot og eht sipoatlh imh at hcsionog eiosdicn ees u,tb bste hte dmae we by. Arhd ti asw. Wsa it afwlu. Ubt it eimt one ot slat losa his asnhd asw odlh lteuiufba. Glnoihd ew cfeodsu no atth egvrndea oermmy os si hdsna his ni cuhm ti uro.
Ilfe rouy yad eftra teh rtswo lwil fo be. Eht nceyemro. Anna su , ish i kcstae bosibng klei reiagsmnc anbtekl our dnoilhg si dna icdlh, lla ofotncr rembreme a. Sahes ihs woh in ewll eth uedd hte and trweh. Dha ruaa a he iomrfncotg.
.
Die will to tnwa yuo. Oyu a oyu revey ot ot cyr temi aehv teak setp lliw awk,l. Lkta eotemisms to lwli dan you eh mhi eefl ekil deposnrs. Itnesl uoy tiem csmui you wlli ot ryc eyvre. Uoy yilpgan tops liwl tiruga. Aer wnko nowt' meyrnao uoy woh uoy. Oyu. Illw tanw. Ot. Ied. Hwy kepe oginebcm for ? ? 'ntca oyur 'tcna wtah fi teerh be hyw escebau orey'u see deiarrm hreet ? ont glvnii he fi od sh'e hwy if ayihgntn egt wingdde eh.
Fiel esgo btu on. It eaitl,rlly you otps nta'c. Epke oyu iwll wgankil ot vhae. Ehav rehhewt tpse tanw a ktea yuo ro ot to artoenh and oyu tno, will. Nda tanoreh. Wkal d,an. But uyo'll iemt cry rveye 'olylu lwka.
Ouy to die aip""p owldu ysa yuo hatt to ton lwli wnat efyruslo. Uoy so ide otnd'. To by etitll tyr and ueirsvv you lwil i,lttle. Oecbme liwl ivvsugnri inlgiv ltt,lie yb ilttel dna. Ew tbu erthe neto are tey. Viinursgv are llist we. Kepe ivale adn ot gintry naan.
.
Elov hesgnttr ndee illw htis from ymlifa adn ot uyo oryu mcrveooe srfdeni uar,oceg adn. Os i'm rteyvhngie caaevdn i in gensdin yuo have.
.
Uyo i eolv.
Piap trfo imas itema'. . . Frto èrts ):.
.
Ouy.
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