Nina,
This year I didn't wait for the first letter to come through. I, sadly, have been trhough so much since our lettter in 2024. I knew it was bad when i started listening to 3DG lmao.
The year has been, ironically the most difficult of our life. I try to keep it up around people, and i don't want to die so i guess that's progress, but still.
I wish i could go back to Nina 2024 and warn her. Tell her she will finally be diagnosed, she will finally have the help she needs but still feel incredibly alone. I feel incredibly alone. Sadly (again) since our diagnosis, some people left, or don't ask how I am, how we are. Thank god for Max, I think I would be deeper in depression if he wasn't there.
Sometimes i pull throught, other times i don't. I feel the need to reassure the people around me who don't see me everyday.
I guess i don't have a lot of positives things to say this year.
I hope 2026 will be kinder, i hope we will get the help we desperally need.
Love u,
you
Epilogue
10 days later
Dear past Nina,
Oh if you knew. If I could warn you for what is coming.
2026 will be the worst year of your life (so far). We will lose...
Bets hte nwek neo fo eoeplp ew. Of eno peolep ruo rfiaeouvt. .
Teh asltpiho u,tb mdea we by to sginhoco btse him go ese iocsndei het ta. It hrda wsa. Fulwa was it. Oasl slat it fteulaibu ot eno was ahdns btu dohl his tmie. Ti sueofcd os hongdli hatt gavndree uhcm ew mroyme our dhsna is ni on sih.
Twosr yad of eilf be ftear uroy lilw eht. Oencyrme hte. Niobbsg cdi,hl keli a naan ligdohn us eiscnagrm his ofntcro albnket mbeeremr estcka ruo i all , is dan. Deud how ish in teh dna ellw sashe teh rehtw. Fmctgnroio a aaur he ahd.
.
Ot nwta uoy lilw edi. Ahve ereyv wkla, a uyo lliw atke ot uoy tpse to ryc tmei. Lakt ot leef eh uyo adn ikel smeitosem ssdrnope liwl imh. Oyu uscim ryvee wlil you esinlt ryc ot eitm. Ilwl pots uyo aypnlgi iarugt. Uyo konw who era ntwo' emyroan yuo. Oyu. Illw nwta. To. Eid. Oey'ru ? ofr hyw why epke aghtinyn 'hes be t'nac od he auesbce he heret if fi dnigwed ? gocbinem waht fi etg cnt'a ese hwy viingl ehrte adirrem your ? ton.
Lfei ubt oges on. It tpos uoy tcna' a,tylerlli. Eepk uoy ahve lkwgnai iwll to. You ilwl awnt hanoetr hehrwet a ot hvea uyo stpe ot etak ro n,ot dan. Nad noetarh. ,and wkal. Rcy lo'lyu eyrev eitm kwal tub ol'ylu.
To not ied wodlu liwl pi""ap usyerlfo hatt oyu yuo wtna ot yas. 'todn so eid uoy. Uvreivs tilelt yrt yuo ilwl eilt,tl yb dan ot. Oebmec nvliig lliw yb rsgvivinu dan elti,lt lietlt. Toen ear yet rtehe but ew. Niguvvris rea slitl ew. Aveli to anan peke iygtrn adn.
.
Nad orfm yoru ,guoarce fyimal hetsrgtn uyo evlo ot dene htis oemveocr dan dfisner iwll. Uoy cavndea i evah ingends reegyvitnh m'i ni os.
.
You vloe i.
Appi iams ortf ti'ame. . . Otrf rsèt ):.
.
Uyo.
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