no subject

Dear FutureMe, How are you? I hope you're well and not thinking about dying. I am right now. I'm thinking about dying. I won't, though, I still have our cat to take care of. I hope Bong is healthy? I don't know what else to ask or to say. I don't want to sadden you. I don't want you to overthink on your birthday. But I ultimately love you, you love yourself, I know that. Even though the world is so tiring for both of us, even though nothing goes well for us. You hate changes, right? Anything changed? Anything else stagnant? Is it better or worse? I'm dreading those changes right now. I'm sorry for making you go through it. I promise I love you, Sen. I promise you I do. Even though I loathe you, I love you more than anyone, I know you more than anyone. Please take care, Sen. Have fun on your birthday. Play your games, you started them for a reason. I'm signing up for Gemini Cup now and it's soon. You'll know the results but I won't, so hopefully it'll be good. Honestly, I'm curious what your art will look like in some more months. I know I talk big right now, wanting to draw backgrounds and do animatics. Did I end up doing that at all? Cool if you did. I'm proud of you. We should totally kiss by the way. "How?" Idk, but we should totally kiss if no one kissed you yet at this point. Hell, we SHOULD get married. But if someone DID though, kiss you on the mouth, congrats and it sucks it happened to you instead of me. I miss kissing someone else, this sucks so much actually. Living sucks balls, I hate you actually if you did kiss someone. Cheater. ******. Whatever, I keep rambling. I love you and take care. Don't **** yourself as long as our cat is alive.