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Dear FutureMe, A very Happy 35th Birthday to you! Writing this the day before your 34th birthday (still 33 years old for the next 9 hours!). You were surprised to get your birthday letter a day earlier but to answer your previous questions, "In previous emails you've been wanting to travel, do more yoga, work out more, read more, watch TV less, and do things I love. Are you doing these things now that you're not working full time? Or is it that you aren't doing them because other things came up in life (like working for LJ or doing other part time work)?": As of 2025 I've been reading so much it's almost an obsession. I have no interest in TV anymore but it seems like I've replaced one obsession with another (reading)? Still haven't started yoga (the plan was to start next week) so who knows I hope by the time I read this email in the future I will be fullblown into yoga. Working out well.. that's been a bit rough especially with my whole lifestyle change working at LJ. Still trying to wrap my head around it. What I wish for you is an actual Happy 35th Birthday and not one like right now were I just feel like crying and missing Mom's and Dad. Your 35th birthday will be your 3rd birthday without mom, and 4th birthday without Mammie and Padre. Despite that I wish for you that you have the courage to do what YOU want or even the courage to take the time you need to actually figure out what YOU want and not what is expected of you. Hopefully you have the courage to say you don't want to work the window of LJ. Hopefully you've had time to travel before getting kids (doubtful I know...), and hopefully you've sorted out all these doubtful feelings you have (especially your depression). Maybe then you will feel less depressed and have time to grieve properly. These emails are the only things really in which some of my thoughts can live on. On that note I hope you do find a way to journal with a peace of mind that others (aka husband) won't read your stuff. Love, your past-self (who is missing and nostalgic about my younger self)