A letter from July 13th, 2025

Dear FutureMe,   it's 9:05, you've been up since 5:00. your stoned as hell sitting in Carson's room with a tent over his bed at Michelle's house (Carson's sleeping with his mom) it's been like a year since you smoked, yeah edibles every night but I quit smoking forever ago because I was coughing so much. any who...I'm freaking out (not really) that I smoked in Carson's room and it'll smell. it was a vape so I'm sure I'm okay but man I want another hit now but I gotta wait for michelle to wake up. lol...by the time she wakes up I'm going to be ready for a nap. she just wants to chill out and smoke and I'm perfectly fine with that. maybe watch movies more likely smoke sleep laugh. worried about Sensei trying to drive which isn't close to safe since she can barley turn her neck. I probably should have stayed another week but I felt bad being gone so long. Randy said to stay as long as I needed but there was a sense of guilt that I got to hide away from life even if I was taking care of my mom and doing everything it wasn't my problems. yeah that truth just hit as I was typing. back to reality ina couple of days. totally motivated to clean and organize my bedroom and the living room and bathrooms even. I'm smart enough to know the minute I see it all I'll be 200% overworked and will put my blinders back on. I really wish I could be clean and organized like Sensei. okay I'm just babbling (man I really want a hit and my suitcase which is in the car) Hope you're in a good place when you get this