A letter from Jul 13, 2025

Dear Future Me, Right now, life feels like a rollercoaster. Some days I’m surviving more than living, but I’m still here. I’m learning how to protect my peace, even when it feels selfish. I’m setting boundaries—not to push people away, but to stop letting the wrong ones get too close. It’s not easy, and I still question myself a lot… but I’m trying. I’m working hard—sometimes too hard—but I want something better for myself. I want stability. I want peace. I want to feel proud of the life I’m building, even if it’s slow. I know I’m not perfect, and I’m learning to accept that too. I’m trying to trust my instincts more, even when people try to make me feel like I’m “too much” for doing so. I give a lot of myself, sometimes to the wrong people, and I’m learning how to stop doing that—how to save some love for me. Right now, I’m still with my boyfriend. We’ve been together for two years. We live together now, in a house that’s supposed to be a home—but some days, it doesn’t feel that way. We share the same space, but sometimes I feel more alone than ever. I love him deeply, but I’m hurting. There are moments where it feels like he wants me to be the one to walk away, like he’s pushing me out little by little. But I’m still holding on, even when it feels like I’m the only one trying. My heart is heavy in ways I can’t always put into words. My soul is tired—like it’s been stretched thin trying to carry love, patience, and hope all at once. I cry more than I let anyone see. I try to smile and keep going, but there’s a quiet ache in me that doesn’t go away. I just wish we were better. I wish we could talk without tension. I wish I felt more seen, more loved, more held. And on top of everything, my parents are moving away soon. That layer of support, even if it wasn’t perfect, is shifting too. It makes me feel even more on my own, like this version of adulthood is just piling up responsibilities with no break in sight. But even with all of this, I haven’t given up. Not on him, not on us, not on myself. I still believe in the possibility of better days. I still dream of the version of us that chooses each other fully—without hesitation, without fear, without games. I hope we make it there. I really do. I hope by the time you read this, you’re not just surviving anymore. I hope you’re surrounded by love that doesn’t make you question your worth. I hope your heart is lighter, your spirit more at peace, and your soul no longer aching in silence. But most of all, I hope you kept going. Love, Me