A letter from Jun 16, 2025

Hi me, it's me... I'm writing this because I'm very, very overwhelmed by my emotions. I need someone to talk to, but I don't have someone that would be willing to listen to me. Tito Randy just died, and my phone is broken, and I don't know; I don't feel like I belong with my friends. It could just be me, but I don't know. I DON'T KNOW! I hate feeling like this. I've been concealing my feelings for so long, and now I'm having a really good cry while writing this. Since it's just you, I want to tell you that I hope na may magustohan ka because… I think that liking someone is an emotion that would make these bad feelings go away. I'm so sad I don't even know why. I feel like this is the lowest point in my life. I don't know what to do. I'm not motivated to continue my hobbies and scared to try anything new. I don't know what can make me feel good right now. I've always known how to take care of myself; now I just don't know! I keep forgetting I'm a teenager that really wants to be loved too, and it really hurts. IT REALLY DOES when you feel this ******. It's my graduation next week, and I'm not really expecting anything from anyone. To be honest, I don't want to graduate. Everyone keeps saying it's a good thing, but it's not! How is going on to another part in my life where I start from the beginning again? I don't want to lose my friends, even though I don't feel belonged or heard there anymore; they are still all I have left. I know my parents won't care to listen to me or anything or even support me, so I don't know what to do. I feel so lonely. Haa, this is so pathetic. I'm so sorry if you had to read this, but it kind of eases me that I will read this in the future. Isn't that kind of weird? Well, I don't care anymore. My room is such a mess, and I'm legit too sad to even do anything right now. I just want to talk to someone, anyone. Honestly, I didn't want to do this because I'm bad at saying my emotions or describing them. I'm dyslexic, based on everyone I know. I'm not really diagnosed, but I have all the symptoms. I struggle every day because of it. We don't have any money to diagnose me, so everything is really ****** right now. It sucks. I never thought I'd say this, but I don't want to experience my life anymore.