A letter from Jun 05, 2025

Dear FutureMe, Hello to you, i have a lot to say pero depende nlng unsay matype dire. I hope mabasa nimo in the future kay di raba ka mag open og email nmo wa kay pake. Bitaw, in this time June 6, 2025, you're 20 years old already. Can't say that you had already things you can share well sort of naa man nuon, but at least you are learning from your experiences. All I will say in this letter is either magpabilin or makuhaan nmo i hope og lessons and also a reminder for you self in the future in case makalimot ka. I am writing this hoping that this will reach you in time you will need words. Although God will be there for you, but still hoping you can read this in time. I want you to remember and know that it's fine, it's alright, it' okay to be alone. Up until now you are still afraid of going out, like heart beats faster, having hard time breathing, obvious worried expression, idk if it's something what they call anxiety but despite that you still go on your own, maybe because no one wants to be with you or even accompany you in a short time or simply because you just want to do things alone but mentally and physically it whispers scary things to you. I'm in my 20's who wants to be with someone who I can share things i like and hate, rant or vent to someone, deep talks with someone. Is it just me or am i really that lonely. Questions like, am i not fun to be with, am i unpleasant to look at, does my vibe shouts awkwardness, idk. No one gets excited to see me, no one rushes to see me, no one wants to be with me, Just, no one likes me. I have a friend who I can call one, we've been friends for like almost 9 years, but still there is that awkwardness a bit, and basta, don't want to talk about that. Now I am so insecure, it's s hard to admit it, knowing I am uniquely and wonderfully made by God. But you know what, just little reminders, don't be afraid to go out on your own, no one will judge you but if there will be it's fine, the world is too big to even care about those things, if they judge you, minutes later they will forget about it, another thing is that don't force yourself into someone else's life, don't be sad that the people you like don't invite you to go somewhere or to do whatever, remember, you are not wrong yourself you're just misplaced, you just haven't meet the people who will see you and will love and like you for who you are and will be excited to see you, will sulk, and even decides not to go because you're not coming. I pray that you will find your own peeps, just trust God, He will not let you be sad for a long time.