A letter from May 18th, 2025

Dear FutureMe, idk what to write so i’ll just give an update, my grades are not very good i cried a lot abt it and wanted to **** myself my parents are no help either and i feel tired, like my days are great but when i get home i just want to die but im afraid of *****, i dont want to tell them that they won’t understand i just wish i could skip this phase and go to the next one. i also think none of the boys like me, i want to fit in so bad but i can’t, i don’t have a lot of friends and im not even their first choice. i’m only 14 and i already have to much weight to carry, my parents are always putting pressure on me to get good grades and saying that im smart but i dont think so, i think im dumb and will fail in life but i dont want to disappoint them. i feel bad thinking that way because we are rich and most people aren’t and i feel my problems dont matter. most people say i am pretty but i dont think so. i hate when people compliment me and say like “you are so smart” i feel horrible i just want to tell them im not, its worse when they say to my parents like “your daughter is so smart and beautiful” they will tell me that for the whole week and say “everyone thinks that about you be better be like that”. they don’t let me have social media but i have anyways, since i was 10, i’ve started to answer them back and roll my eyes to them i just hope they won’t **** me lol.anyways, i hope you’re doing great.

date: sunday, may 18 2025status: letterboxd: 171 movies this yearwhite boy of the month: anakin skywalker