A letter from May 18, 2025

Dear FutureMe, I think about you very often. In my fantasy, you are braver than me, smarter than me, stronger than me and prettier than me. I think about the person I will become once I can stop losing pieces of myself to people who are unworthy. I think about the person I will become, living a perfectly messy college life, with good grades and casual ***. I hope to feel young in the future. I hope you stopped chasing the dream of being easy to love, being understanding beyond sane, being loving through hate. Nowadays, these thoughts are the only thing keeping me from drowning in my loneliness and self doubt. I hope you don’t do that. I hope you don’t live in your fantasies of the future. I hope you live in the present and you make the most of it. I know that’s hypocritical of me to say, but it’s true. I don’t know what your life looks like right know but I hope you are in peace, no matter where life led you. I hope you love yourself. Have you seen the third lord of the rings movie yet? If you haven’t, I think it might be time. Watch it with a friend, watch it with a lover, or watch it alone. But watch it. Stop romanticizing your endless waiting. You are not alone, at the very least you have your sister. I have some advice for you, if you will take it. Some people are not meant to stay in your life forever, know when to let them go. If everyone liked you, you wouldn't be human, learn to find your people. If you spend your entire life in fear of disappointing others, you will disappoint yourself. A person willing to let you go will never be the person that stays. If you don’t like something, change it, your future is yours alone to shape. You are not a victim of your past, you are the result of it, don’t live with regrets. Acknowledge your mistakes and do better, don’t wallow in self pity. Do your ******* homework. A year is not a long time to reinvent yourself, so it would be logical for me to assume you are not fully where you want to be. However, I don’t think you will ever be where you want to be- and that’s a good thing. You will always reach further into the improbable every time you get close and that’s why you will succeed. Reach for the stars but enjoy the journey, please. I love you with all my heart, more than I have ever loved anyone else. You deserve the love you give to others, don’t accept any less. You can’t go back in time but you can make sure your future is brighter by learning your lesson. Good luck with everything, I believe you can do anything you put your mind into. Love, Nate ps: i hope the braces are gone by now, I hate not being able to chew. if they are gone, chew some gum for me please.