A letter from May 07, 2025

Sofia, As of this current day in time, we're officially no longer on terms that would lead me to believe we have any sort of future together. I've come to terms that I hate you, and my love for you has at last fizzled out. I don't currently and pray I don't ever have an urge to message you again in my life, but I figured for an attempt at some closure I'll send you this letter in the hopes that when it delivers you'll be able to read it and for once maybe understand that I wasn't all that bad of a man. We ended because of your hidden attempts at infidelity, and how you lied about it. Those actions caused me to self harm and I guess in your eyes, that's what scared you away. I sit here wondering if you even realize that you were the catalyst to those actions. Did you intend on that from the moment you started feeling feelings for my once best friend? How long did you process splitting up with me before you actually did it. And I'm always going to wonder this until the day I die, but how could you have been so heartless as to just leave me sitting there after I self harmed. In reflection, it's strange that you did that, you didn't even offer me any consolation. If that doesn't speak on the "love" you had for me, I don't know what will. And then you strung me along for months, for what I've come to believe was to ease your guilt of what you did. "Keep the Liam in my life so it doesn't feel like what I did was so bad, he's still around. He still loves me." Did you do that on purpose? Why did you keep telling me you wanted to get back together, then continue to string me along? The first few months after our split were some of the most grueling I've ever endured. 6 months later and I still weep over the pain you caused me in those moments. The times where you'd still come over, have *** with me, and then sleep as if nothing was wrong. You know what I was doing? Sitting in the corner of the room, crying my heart out into darkness, maybe subconsciously knowing that the moment we were in wouldn't last forever. But it all got worse once we officially stopped talking, and you found someone new. I still think about what you said to me in 2022 often, "Yeah if we were to break up, I'd likely be having *** 1/2 weeks after splitting." During our relationship this statement caused me grief thinking of the future and the unknown. **** became a reality. How soon did you start flirting with other people? Were you flirting with them while we were still talking? I think of our final moments, when we were going to the aquarium together, and I thought to myself as we were having ***, "I'm probably not the only one she's thinking of during this intimate moment anymore." I'll never know this truth, only you will, but I've chosen to accept that people like "Matt G" and "609gz" were there long before I had initially thought. And if I'm honestly right, that's ****** up. Even in the aftermath, you couldn't help but lie through your teeth. Life is short, and we are young. But I'll be honest with you, aside from the ******* you pulled at the end, I think we had a pretty good bond Sofia. Sure, I didn't have all the money on the world to spend on you, and you're an attention hog so maybe that was a sign of incompatibility. However I think of the peaceful times. When we could .05 each other and smile and laugh, it was so pure. The times where we did things, not even intimate, that those who were truly in love do. The harshest, and perhaps what I need, part of all of this is how I've forced myself to move on. I've forcefully so many of our memories, or just rewrote them to match the you who I know to be today with the you who you once were. The Sofia Marinello who first brought me to Camp Out in 2022 has now morphed into the Sofia Marinello who shattered my heart into more pieces than I could even count. I was never an angry person, you know this. But I've learned these negative emotions again, and they've all unfortunately latched onto you. So in the end, no revenge, no pettiness. But every ounce of "love" we once shared has now turned to hate. So please, do me that same favor and learn to hate me if you haven't already. I am weak, and I always will be weak. And I fear that in any age in life if I crossed paths with you and you tried to interact with me, I would fault on all this progress I've made. So one year into the future, I hope you're doing miserable. Never forget what you threw away, and never forget how you turned my love wicked for the rest of my life. Here's to the rest of our lives, if I'm in Heaven, I hope you're in Hell. And if I'm in Hell, I hope you're in Heaven. Unforgivingly, Liam DiFerdinando