A letter from May 04, 2025

Bismillah. Dear FutureMe, Yesterday was your last HSC exam. I don't know how the HSC went for you, but speaking from the 04/05/25, we're in a tough place. Our ranks are all low: 3rd in chemistry, last in extension, 12th in maths and in the 20s for bio. That's horrible, even though we managed to be 1st in English advanced and SOR 1U. But I believe in you, I believe that by the time the HSC comes around, you will be 1st in SOR, English advanced and extension, still in the top three for chemistry, and in the top 10 for maths and biology. If you are, say Alhamdulillah, and praise Allah for how far He has brought you. (and skip down to when it says "-----") And if you aren't? Say Alhamdulillah, and praise Allah for how far He has brought you. It's sad, but look how far you've come, I guess. To be honest, there is nothing I could say, or that you could tell yourself, which would alleviate this grief. Really, there isn't. But you have a lot of time now to cry and reflect, to go through your old diaries, to write a lot and make plans for your business ventures. You have a whole life ahead of you. This was, truly, a tragedy, and perhaps a great plot for a film, novel or poem, but hey. At least you're here with me. --- You know, writing this, I am thinking about how far we've come. Not just in an academic sense, which is how you've primarily defined growth for so long, but also in an emotional nd intellectual sense. Remember how you were before you came to your new school? You were unsure, ashamed of your faith---and not realising why that shame was even bad! You held so much fear about the Qur'an, now it's your close friend. And how elegantly seamless, how amazingly unnoticed, was the transition? Did you ever identify the change between fearing the Qur'an, as if it truly harboured scary, oppressive ideologies, as if it would condemn you to some backward, unacceptable and repulsive lifestyle as a woman, to reading it almost regularly with the translations, to crying along with the recitation, to loving the Qur'an and your religion incomparably and referring to it for all sorts of guidance. To having the confidence to explore its meanings, comment on them, and explain them to your friends. You have a lot to thank Allah for, my dear, and regardless of your ATAR, you have come a long way. Isn't it sad that we live in a world where the pursuit of knowledge is not glorified simply for what it is? That instead, it is tied to, and respected only in light of, quantifiable markers of achievement? As if a trophy or award could ever indicate how much you've learned and how much you know. Live a little! What a shallow existence it is, to base your whole life simply around outcomes! What a shallow existence. It is not a pragmatic mindset, it is simply an unenlightened one. Live dangerously, and by that I mean, do not be afraid to throw yourself, mind, body and soul, into a pursuit, into a goal, a passion, as long as it is in the Name of Allah. For if that is the case, it doesn't matter whether or not you achieved exactly what you had in mind, because while you may not have secured worldly success, you would have secured that of the other world. It is when you forget that you live to worship Allah that life loses all its colour. That you think you have failed, that you think it useless to try your best if you cannot guarantee a specific outcome. It is when you remember that all this, all this was and is in the service of God, that your unending, burning desire for success is intricately and absolutely interwoven with your desire to please your Lord, to glorify His Name, to declare fervently and confidently to this entire world that He is One, unparalleled and unequalled, that your ambitions become timeless. It is severed forever from the thousand voices in literature--and, at some point, your own--that chided excessive ambition, it is divorced from melancholy, and feelings of helplessness. It is then that success doesn't matter, and, ironically, it is then that success is ensured. So, my dear, take a break, congratulate yourself and thank your Lord. Sit down, reflect, and read Qur'an. Think about all the things you've wanted to do, and know that it is time to do them. Apply yourself to them fearlessly: ice skating, writing, entrepreneurism... Gather all the books you will now have time to read! Prepare yourself for the next chapter of your life, and remember to start, and end, with Bismillah. "فَٱذْكُرُونِىٓ أَذْكُرْكُمْ وَٱشْكُرُوا۟ لِى وَلَا تَكْفُرُونِ ١٥٢ remember Me; I will remember you. And thank Me, and never be ungrateful. يَـٰٓأَيُّهَا ٱلَّذِينَ ءَامَنُوا۟ ٱسْتَعِينُوا۟ بِٱلصَّبْرِ وَٱلصَّلَوٰةِ ۚ إِنَّ ٱللَّهَ مَعَ ٱلصَّـٰبِرِينَ ١٥٣ O believers! Seek comfort in patience and prayer. Allah is truly with those who are patient."