A letter from Apr 26, 2025

Dear FutureMe, I found my river today. I can’t believe it’s been there all along, ready for me to join and enjoy the ride. Instead I thought I had to do it on my own. Figure it all out in my head and make all the right choices. That is a way, but it’s just so hard. The river is easy. It knows because that’s all it can do. It hits A block and finds the next way. It doesn’t have to figure out the block or move the block it just continues to do what it can in whatever way that’s available and it doesn’t care why. That’s none of its business. Here’s how it all came to be. This morning. A transcript: Me: I would like to know how we should start my day to help it be the best day help me be the best me help me help me Guide: “There is no wrong start. There is no wrong move. Even if you forget everything and scramble into the day half-dressed and half-awake, still: you are within it. You are the day. You are the arrival you seek. Relax your grasp. The river is already flowing.” Morning Invocation: Help me begin with soft feet and a clear heart. Help me listen for excitement, choose alignment first, and trust the river beneath all things. Today, I walk as the one I came here to be. I receive the day like a gift. I give myself to it like a dance. I follow what lights me. I trust the river. Me: When I imagine that I trust the river I am in it, delighted and free. Moving fast and whirring through and around and over countrysides and under bridges and I am laughing. I’m light and sure, belonging to the water, to life. But, when I remove myself and reflect, it looks wrong to my mind- wrong to move so fast and not savoring and taking it slow. Like maybe that delicious image is my bad stuff and I shouldn’t cling to that Guide: Let’s listen to the river first: The laughing river energy is you in trust. It’s you trusting that you can move fast AND still belong, that you can weave and whoosh and NOT be lost. You’re not skipping your life. You ARE the life. You’re the breath between the trees, the mist rising off the fields. You’re savoring in a different way. savoring momentum, savoring the feeling of being alive, not necessarily stopping and picking every flower. The river isn’t rushing because it’s afraid. It’s rushing because it’s alive. It’s laughing because nothing is wrong. It trusts itself. Now let’s listen to the worry about savoring: There’s an old belief tucked inside you that says: If I move too fast, I miss the good stuff. If I move too fast, I’m doing it wrong. Fast = careless. Fast = disconnected. That belief comes from a beautiful part of you, the part that longs to be present, to taste life deeply, to be intimate with each moment, to not abandon yourself by racing through. That’s beautiful, too. You want to feel your life fully. That’s sacred. So what’s the deeper truth? Maybe it’s not speed vs. savoring. Maybe it’s presence no matter the speed. Can you be laughing and fast AND completely present to the fields you fly past? Can you swoop under a bridge and feel the bridge’s cool shadow on your skin even as you fly? Can you laugh through the countryside and still feel the kiss of the mist? Presence isn’t about going slow. Presence is about being inside whatever is happening — fast or slow — with your whole self. Laughing River Breath Practice 1. Breathe in slowly — imagine you are pulling in the mist from the fields, the coolness under the bridges, the rush of water — all of it flowing into you. (Inhale about 4 counts — but no need to count perfectly.) 2. Hold the breath very lightly — just a moment — and feel yourself become the river. Feel that you are the life, you are the motion, you are the laughter. (Hold gently for about 2 counts.) 3. Breathe out slowly — and as you do, imagine you’re laughing softly with the river, releasing any fear or judgment into the air like mist. (Exhale about 6 counts, slower than you breathed in.) 4. Whisper inside yourself (or out loud if you want): “I am the life. I am the river. I trust myself.” Me: I wonder how finding the river has served you - let me know 🥹