A letter from Apr 21, 2025

Dear future me, This letter will be sent to you in a year, so you'll be almost done with your first year of high school. How is high school? people always talk about it like its scary but people said the same thing about middle school and sure their are diffrences but that doesnt techniclly mean it was a big change in terms of the learning process. social life on the other hand only gets more complicated as you grow up and learn to mature and therefore lose and gain friends. i think i should learn to love highschool even if i grow to hate it because its 4 years long thats a big chunk of life, yk? And then theres collage, in a way everything is going so fast and i know i have time but i have no idea what i want to do with my life what am i even doing now. i dont make good decisons and for a while i thought that meant i wasnt a good person and even now im still struggling with that thought. do i ever quit in highschool? i had so many bad experiences with it but yet i continue to use and i justify it by saying hey it isnt cocain and i dont do it everyday but i do it enough that i find myself craving it. and when i see my dad asleep on the couch cause hes to high and drunk to function and needs to sleep it off before he drives home i wonder how much of me is like him. i remind myself cant be as bad as him, i shouldnt let myself become that. maybe when i get this letter i will find out if that bad desicion is really worth it and if it makes me a bad person.