A letter from Mar 31, 2025

Do you see me? Maybe a little blurry, I'm still standing here, I've never abandoned you, I've simply walked away and slowly returned, every time you look in the mirror judging, I'm there like a silent spectator, stalking your thoughts, I love you, I hate you at the same time, I don't know why you do certain things or decide to stay in certain moments... The past is sharp and slowly bleeds you dry, the present causes uncertainty every time you open those beautiful eyes, and the future makes you excessively paranoid, sometimes I see all that potential going to places where the mind has no dominion, and you stare at the white ceiling waiting for something outside your own domain to happen, and you like it, you like to think that everything will be okay even when it's upside down, even when you're feeling everything burning in your gut, it's like you sometimes doubt who you are at certain moments, like you are your own executor and your own ego at the same time... You take photos because you cherish the moments and want stories to share, you stand in front of your reflection to appreciate every facial feature and doubt whether you are attractive or not? Like a Van Gogh in his prime, you simply feel that you are recognized enough, yet you feel that your own spiritual value, your foundations, your tastes, your identity persevere internally, and you cling to that, along with your willpower and a supreme being, so as not to let yourself fall into what once had you on the verge of mental collapse. You see yourself shining, but sometimes you like to hide from the sun (Like a Stone). You are grateful for what is coming to your plate, but not enough, because you always crave more. You see the clock passing quickly and you feel stressed, but you calm down and say there is still enough time. There are days when you get up again with everything on your mind and you look at the ground. You are an iceberg with burning and deep feelings. Others, you simply get up thanking God for the existence of what you have despite your emptiness of being adored, and you learned, you learned to see the good side of things in contingency. You want leave a mark, on people, in the place where you are, in the world, and the future shines on your side despite your difficulties, you learned to give a part of yourself without expecting anything in return because you learned to differentiate purity and emptiness in people, you learned to take care of your spiritual energy and to close your circle a lot, to appreciate your family beyond your faults, I think that makes you a valuable human being, but there is still a lot to learn, much of what will increase your potential and your value, do you want me to tell you something? Maybe today you will wake up and not look so bad at all to go out.